Thinking about being OAD because first born is so easy??

@brhjz Our son loves sleep, has slept through the night since 4.5 months. He takes multiple 2 hour naps a day alone in his crib. As a newborn, he never had reflux or purple crying or anything else. He has always been an easy baby yet I struggle with him. One of the reasons I am OAD, if I struggle with an easy baby, can’t imagine having a hard one.
 
@brhjz Hard cannot relate as my baby was a velcro and very forceful kicking and screaming kinda baby - the sort of baby that makes people stop having more. Don't be fooled by people telling you to have more because it's "easy" the more I'm in the parenting game the more I realise that temperament has a big hand in your kid and less so your parenting. I was OAD before having our son - he's 3.5 now and I'm convinced that if I have another they would be an even harder baby - whilst I am faced with different challenges now he's a toddler, objectively he is getting easier.
 
@brhjz That sounds amazing! My baby is 9 months old and around 7 months finally slept through the night 10 hours! He had bad reflux when he was a newborn so I ended up having to hold him for 30 minutes after the bottle so he didn’t spit it all up after. We are OAD for many reasons though! But I cannot do the sleep deprivation again I become a very unhappy person without at least 6 hours straight of sleep a night I’ve discovered lol
 
@brhjz My son was a very easy baby. Before we made the final decision to be OAD, I used to joke that his younger sibling would be the one to humble us. But we got what was coming to us in the preschool years. There were times I could not fathom having another child on top of him.
 
@brhjz I wouldn’t take a chance on another hahaha my kid is not a good sleeper. She’s about to be 2.5 and I’m still getting up once a night.

Also, this happened with my mom. My older sister was super easy. Then I came along and it was bad. I was a colic baby. Then my younger sister came and it was even worse. Childhood was bad too.

My daughter isn’t like crazy easy but she isn’t the worst either. Even though I don’t have a choice , I wouldn’t want to risk it either
 
@brhjz 100% this is one of my strongest reasons. She's such a perfect addition to our family, my heart actually breaks at the thought of having to share her or my heart with another kid.
 
@brhjz My one and only is now 14. He was such a good and easy baby. When I was being pressured for baby number 2 by his family my response was always “I’ll never get this lucky twice!” And I’m glad I never went through with a second. I have great memories of my son as a baby and I had it fairly easy with him (compared to others).
 
@brhjz My baby was like this. I remember when she was six weeks old I watched her on the monitor laying with her eyes wide open in her crib not making a peep and thinking and contemplating her life just totally chill. Even as a newborn we weren’t tired because she slept in 3 hour chunks. In fact she would’ve slept more and we had to set alarms to feed her. She’s three and a little more challenging but relatively speaking a breeze compared to most kids her age. She wakes up in the AM and plays quietly by herself for one plus hours. I can get done anything I need to do at home (ie my house is spotless) and she’s chill about it. I can bring her to restaurants and appOintments and don’t have to worry about meltdowns. She’s only had probably less than 10 tantrums in her life and only one lasted more than a few minutes. She is 3.5 and naps daily. She can already read. She’s sweet and polite and cleans up after herself. Adults love to talk with her because she’s so intelligent. This is one reason why I don’t want another. The next one won’t be like this
 
@brhjz We felt this way for the first 14 months of our child’s life. They were an absolute dreamboat baby. Slept and ate like a champ. Now I’m sitting here with tears welling up in my eyes because my child is the most violent child I think I have ever encountered right now. He hits, kicks, spits, bites etc.. I can’t take him in public without him absolutely embarrassing me. My husband and I don’t even yell at home let alone hit. We have no idea why he is this way. There is no way we could have another child when the one we have keeps us practically chained to our house.
 
@brhjz Our first is 15 months. She's an amazing sleeper, eats great, has such a joyful disposition. All kids are different. It can only go downhill from here!
 
@brhjz i’ll just say my mom said if my brother was first he would’ve been an only bc he was SO hard. i was first and a very easy baby- they thought they it would be the same the second time 😅 we have all sustained injuries from his childhood. LOVE him now, but lord he was tough

edit: to quote my mom “i read all the books with him, and nothing could help us”
 

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