@lynnede Goddamn I’m so sorry for you. Not being sexual enough for him is not even an excuse that should cross your mind. People cheat because they’re cheaters and has NOTHING to do with how much sex they’re getting at home.
@karavcs Word. It’s hard not to run everything through my head because it’s all so intrusive. I know it’s not a justification. You guys are helping me really stand by the fact that it is unjust and unacceptable.
@lynnede I’m sorry honey. Just here to say I hear you and I’m holding you and your pain in the light. Rant away. I’ve been where you’ve been and trust me, it does get better. Be gentle on yourself.
@lynnede Dude, I can empathize with you so much. I’m working on my master’s right now, I work, we have 4 kids. Literally the last thing on my mind is sex, and my husband doesn’t get it. So I totally understand your point of view, and he is a total shitbag for what he did to you. You should be proud of yourself for what you accomplished, and he does NOT deserve you.
@ineedadvice101 Thank you! Like it’s a season it’s so busy. Is loyalty, respect and appreciation so much to ask? NO. Sick of these guys. Good for you on your masters! I don’t think I can do it lol.
@ineedadvice101 That’s amazing! Well my dream job is put on hold. Currently pursuing my teaching certificate because I need to make more money asap and all keep a schedule that matches my sons.
@lynnede Omg even if he hadn't cheated, he was a demanding asshole who expected you to be all revved up without him doing his share in the home.
So yeah, you will be better off and be able to relax in your own downtime.
I had one that hated that I would take time to read a book and not be jumping him.
Three jobs me, he didn't work, and on my "days off" I was cleaning the house. We barely lasted a few years (my decision). Go figure.
@blk519 It’s true. I just kept making excuses for him. When he was home he would literally drink day and night and play video games for 10 HOURS STRAIGHT.
I had to read a shit ton for school. I always had to prep for the classes I interpret at my job. I was busy. And I like leisure reading. He needs to read a fucking book. It was certainly not a sustainable relationship…I was pushing through for our son but I’m beyond my limit.
@lynnede OP I am sorry you are going through this. It super sucks and your husband is a trifling POS. I was married to someone similar - I found out he was unfaithful for our entire marriage AND was a coercive sex pest (aka a rapist). I was hard for several years out that I am so much happier, so much less stressed. Even with things being hard/stressful, it’s still better. Am I super busy? Yes, totally. It seems like you are already doing everything. Getting rid of this joker will immediately improve your life. Get a lawyer. You can do this.
@alansteve Right. Like it was already stressful so it’s not different. He was not a help anyway. Sorry to you too but it’s inspiring to hear you are getting better better.
@lynnede Ugh, he's over there fucking anything under the sun and is offended at the idea of you cheating? He's a liar AND a hypocrite.
I'm sorry you found out like this and that it happened at all. The good news is you have that shiny new bachelor's degree that you can launch yourself into a better life with.