My 8 y/o daughter came out as bi but she doesn’t understand what the means and I need advice

[ian1978]

@robbiedaug Someone doesn't agree with you or has a different opinion and that makes them transphobic/homophobic and a bigot? Want to throw anything else at me? Islamaphobic? Racist? Sexist?

 

[chess123mate]

@raptureman2020 Mom of a gay daughter here. Our daughter came out to us at 11, but she was showing very clear signs ever since elementary school that her interests lay with girls, so we weren’t exactly surprised. Things like:

Posters of Taylor Swift and Hannah Montana in her room, not One Direction

Demanding to know who the “pretty girl” was in any movie we suggested seeing

Developing intense emotional crushes on girl friends while having virtually no interest in boys

So it’s definitely possible for your daughter to begin realizing her sexual preferences in elementary school. My daughter has a gay friend who came out in kindergarten.

I would think about whether your daughter has exhibited any age-appropriate interest in girls in the past, such as the types of things I mentioned above. That might give you a better idea of how long she’s been having these feelings.

But what I would NOT do is invalidate her feelings. Don’t tell her she’s too young, don’t tell her she’s mistaken, don’t tell her she’s just imitating her aunt. Just reassure her that you’ll support and love her regardless of who she ends up loving.

And just so you know, it’s completely normal for LGBTQ kids’ sexuality to shift around a bit. My daughter started out thinking she was bi, then decided she was a lesbian, then went back to bi for a while, and is now firmly in the lesbian camp. She also thought she might be genderfluid for a while. So if she does turn out to be gay, don’t be surprised if she changes her mind about what she is a few times—that happens a lot.

 

[kprado]

@raptureman2020 Hello, bi person (assigned female at birth) here, I was sexually interested in women from the age of about 5, I liked their boobs and their faces and all the things about them really, and I also liked men, I didn't know the word for bisexual much later and just thought something was wrong with me until then, but when I found the word it was like everything clicked into place, dont discount her man, she really may be bisexual.

 

[pinktuesday]

@raptureman2020 I mean, does she play “marriage”? Does she play “house”? Does she pretend to drive a car? All of those are adult activities & everyone of those children practice or play to come to an understanding of what they mean. Same can be true of her “dating” other people, whether a boy or girl. I mean, I had a “boyfriend” in Preschool that I stated I would “marry someday” repeatedly. It wasn’t sexual. We picked each other for games & held hands. What would be wrong with her doing the same with a girl her age? It doesn’t have to be sexual, but it is a form of learning that doesn’t have to be weird or involve inappropriateness at all.

Let her “explore” who she likes. If things ever got “sexual”, then pull her back & explain what that is. I truly doubt, however, that it would come to that.