davemuscato
New member
My eleven month old hates bedtime. She’ll start getting upset when she realizes we’ve started her bedtime routine. My husband and I go to bed when she goes to bed and she’s usually tired enough that she falls asleep nursing (she’s EBF), but not always, sometimes she tries to get bitey and I trade her for a pacifier, but her entire life I’ve held her to sleep every night. And she’s almost always woken up anywhere from 20-40 minutes later. She used to just take a little settling and she’d go back to sleep, but after she hit nine months. Nope. It’s not always an event, but there’s often crying and some nights it takes an hour or so to get her to calm down and a lot of just cycling through nursing, patting rocking. She’s not hot or cold, not wet, she’s fed- she just doesn’t want to sleep despite obviously being tired. I thought it was her top teeth because they took FOREVER to fully erupt, but they’re both out.
Her bedtime is 9:30 but sometimes it takes her until 10 to pass out for the first time. I’m a sahm and she and I usually wake up around 9:30/10. Her first nap is usually 12/1 and anywhere from forty minutes to an hour and twenty. Second is usually 5/6 and the same length. The only time I ever wake her up is if she’s still asleep at 7pm. Naps are all contact. Bedtime she’s been in a mini crib next to me most her life, but I’ve recently started bed sharing and it doesn’t make any real difference with how she sleeps at night, but I like the cuddles and after figuring out side nursing, my sleep has improved.
The crying at night sucks. Especially since she can get pretty hysterical, but once she’s asleep it’s fine. I can get up to go to the bathroom and if I disturb her, she’ll look at me and just turn over. She wakes two times a night to nurse and goes right back to sleep. I think while she’s not a “good” sleeper as our friends babies, we’ve got it pretty decent. HOWEVER my stress about the situation is feeling like my husband sees it as a problem. On the nights when she gets especially worked up or if we actually do have a difficult night, he brings up how I should keep sleep training in mind even thought he knows I don’t want to do it. Specifically Ferber.
She’s tired. She’s fighting sleep. If we let her sit up and we turn on the lights, she’s instantly pleased as punch. She’s likely going to keep pitching a fit about bedtime. Putting her down into a crib and leaving her while she’s already crying would just feel like I was punishing her and doesn’t seem like it would actually solve anything. Maybe he thinks if we deprive her of stimulation she’ll just give up on being awake? I don’t know. The occasional nudge about considering sleep training if this keeps going has taken a situation that isn’t fun to deal with and makes it insanely stressful for me. If I’m having an especially hard time calming her Im also internally panicking because I’m worried that if I’m not getting her to sleep fast enough, my husband will start pushing for sleep training.
I guess I just want some input. Anyone else deal with this? Am I being unreasonable?
TL;DR
Husband keeps bringing up sleep training. I think that baby sleep often sucks and we don’t really even have it particularly bad. And I’d rather be drawn and quartered than not go to my baby when she’s crying
Her bedtime is 9:30 but sometimes it takes her until 10 to pass out for the first time. I’m a sahm and she and I usually wake up around 9:30/10. Her first nap is usually 12/1 and anywhere from forty minutes to an hour and twenty. Second is usually 5/6 and the same length. The only time I ever wake her up is if she’s still asleep at 7pm. Naps are all contact. Bedtime she’s been in a mini crib next to me most her life, but I’ve recently started bed sharing and it doesn’t make any real difference with how she sleeps at night, but I like the cuddles and after figuring out side nursing, my sleep has improved.
The crying at night sucks. Especially since she can get pretty hysterical, but once she’s asleep it’s fine. I can get up to go to the bathroom and if I disturb her, she’ll look at me and just turn over. She wakes two times a night to nurse and goes right back to sleep. I think while she’s not a “good” sleeper as our friends babies, we’ve got it pretty decent. HOWEVER my stress about the situation is feeling like my husband sees it as a problem. On the nights when she gets especially worked up or if we actually do have a difficult night, he brings up how I should keep sleep training in mind even thought he knows I don’t want to do it. Specifically Ferber.
She’s tired. She’s fighting sleep. If we let her sit up and we turn on the lights, she’s instantly pleased as punch. She’s likely going to keep pitching a fit about bedtime. Putting her down into a crib and leaving her while she’s already crying would just feel like I was punishing her and doesn’t seem like it would actually solve anything. Maybe he thinks if we deprive her of stimulation she’ll just give up on being awake? I don’t know. The occasional nudge about considering sleep training if this keeps going has taken a situation that isn’t fun to deal with and makes it insanely stressful for me. If I’m having an especially hard time calming her Im also internally panicking because I’m worried that if I’m not getting her to sleep fast enough, my husband will start pushing for sleep training.
I guess I just want some input. Anyone else deal with this? Am I being unreasonable?
TL;DR
Husband keeps bringing up sleep training. I think that baby sleep often sucks and we don’t really even have it particularly bad. And I’d rather be drawn and quartered than not go to my baby when she’s crying
