katrina2017
New member
@chakra12 My child mimicked it from little kids calling each other it in first grade (with the a, not hard er). In reality, your issue isn’t with those kids, but their parents, and good luck telling others how to raise their kids.
I just explained to her it’s a bad word and when she’s older I’ll explain why. That would be my advice.
I just explained to her it’s a bad word and when she’s older I’ll explain why. That would be my advice.
logicrusade
New member
justme4now
New member
@justme4now No, we are white. It makes it worse 
katrina2017
New member
@chakra12 Don’t overload her with information. Tell her that it is a word that no one is supposed to say. If she asks tell her it is very hurtful and mean and tell her she doesn’t want to be mean. I really hate it when kids cuss because they parrot without understanding the impact. If there is something special she loves, like ice cream, tell her she won’t be able to have it for a week AND send her to a time out.
anthony316
New member
@chakra12 There is no such things as bad words. There are words that are inappropriate, but all they really are is air going over vocal cords and out the mouth.
Teach your child about socially acceptable language, and make the penalty the same no matter what the language she uses. Making this an "extra bad" word will only want her to use it more when you are not around.
Teach your child about socially acceptable language, and make the penalty the same no matter what the language she uses. Making this an "extra bad" word will only want her to use it more when you are not around.
ronaldballard
New member
@chakra12 Usually with kids at that age words are really abstract... and they have not they same meaning they have for us. Making a harsher punishment will make the word more attractive - the forbidden fruit etc. There is no way to make a kid understand exactly why and asking them for empathy and understanding is not really an option. No in this case.
So, ignore the word. Make other "bad words" that are fun to say, mean nothing and ask the kid not to say it to another soul! You can invent your own swear words that have different levels of anger in them. And invent your own words to curse people, like 'you utter buttercup!'
She means nothing wrong. But she also has no capacity to understand the reasons. The boundaries, in order to work, have to be set in something the child CAN understand.
So, ignore the word. Make other "bad words" that are fun to say, mean nothing and ask the kid not to say it to another soul! You can invent your own swear words that have different levels of anger in them. And invent your own words to curse people, like 'you utter buttercup!'
She means nothing wrong. But she also has no capacity to understand the reasons. The boundaries, in order to work, have to be set in something the child CAN understand.
katrina2017
New member
@ronaldballard I strongly disagree. My 5 year old knows what it means because he has heard other kids say it to/near him. Don't ignore it. Educate the kid on why this is wrong.
christyanthony913
New member
@ronaldballard 7 years old is enough to get a meaningful understanding. Certainly enough to understand why not to use it
No, it isn't an adult level understanding, but they can learn that unlike the usual other bad words there is no appropriate time to use this one.
No, it isn't an adult level understanding, but they can learn that unlike the usual other bad words there is no appropriate time to use this one.
@christyanthony913 Right? If my 7 year old is old enough to have experienced racism already, white kids of the same age are old enough to learn about it and fully understand why some things are harmful and cannot be said.
@ronaldballard I like this
katrina2017
New member
inwhominhim
New member
@chakra12 Did you ask where she heard it?
My son had a similar issue and it turns out apparently it's thrown around out his school like nothing between the kids. Non of them were saying it with intent to insult, they were using it as a greeting type thing.
Idk what kid started it, or how but I had to sit my son down and give him a talk about it, the history of it and why he in as a white person should not use the word.
I had to specifically tell him that because he was rather confused and asked why I have never said anything to his friends when I heard them, I told him because they are black they can choose to use or to not use the word. It's simply not my place to decide that.
He hasn't said it since from what I'm aware.
My son had a similar issue and it turns out apparently it's thrown around out his school like nothing between the kids. Non of them were saying it with intent to insult, they were using it as a greeting type thing.
Idk what kid started it, or how but I had to sit my son down and give him a talk about it, the history of it and why he in as a white person should not use the word.
I had to specifically tell him that because he was rather confused and asked why I have never said anything to his friends when I heard them, I told him because they are black they can choose to use or to not use the word. It's simply not my place to decide that.
He hasn't said it since from what I'm aware.
@inwhominhim Way to teach your child that black kids are different
@inwhominhim Your child absolutely can experience racism.