@andy1993 Transition from 1-2 was easier. My second is a far "worse" baby when it comes to sleeping and still it's easier. We chose a small age gap (18 months). Yes its harder dividing attention and all but we are at home a lot, structured our lives to cater mostly to them and actually look forward to them being slightly more independent in a few years so that we have more free time. Although, now that the youngest is 15 months, we are thinking about the 3rd. From 0-1 it was a huge mental shift. All the time for us, our work, friends etc. And then very little of that. No sleep training meant never having a night out. 1-2 did not change that, we were already in that mode if that makes sense. And getting to see them play is really something. Oh, mornings and naps, when they wake up and start rolling around and playing in bed - be still my heart
We take AP loosely. As in we are committed to fostering open emotional communication, creating a safe environment for expressing feelings, encouraging asking questions, following children's cues. But there are so many days that we share ourselves with both at the same time. We do not see it as a bad thing, sharing is an incredible emotional growth that aids in relationships. Yes, they are too small to understand and everything causes trauma, but we are thinking more along the lines of evolutional parenting, that some traumas are worth experiencing if there is growth. So, we try to mitigate the pain that we assume the older one is feeling at times.