Wish I could, but I know better

[writergirlrs]

I have a 22 month old. I have all the common only child worries. I know he’d be a great big brother. But here’s the thing. I know better.

I know what another kid means. It means sharing my body for 9 months. It means the possibility of pre eclampsia and a c section. It means sleepless nights and erratic day time sleeping. It means mom guilt of whether my toddler is getting enough attention and love. It means the alone time my husband and I have reduces even more. And all of that may break me.

Yep, I know better.

 

[joycebowling]

@writergirlrs They will only be lonely if you let them. Between school and weekend stuff (tunnel park, trampoline park, pool club) - when my daughter is home she just wants her time and to be with us.

 

[jrebekah95]

@writergirlrs I watched my child today when we were waiting at a snow cone place interacting with the other kids or entertaining himself. It definitely did my heart good to see him be a social butterfly! Just get the little one out into daycare or do activities where others may be around. You’ll see how little it matters about a sibling.

 

[aver]

@writergirlrs What are your only child worries? Maybe talking them out would help, especially with others on here w an older only child.

 

[writergirlrs]

@aver Oh just the common, “will he be lonely” worry

 

[sembuya]

@writergirlrs This is a valid concern, and many of us in this community have it. I think the way we reframe that thinking is that plenty of us know people that have siblings who they never see, and thus feel a bit lonely too. Another way to spin it positively is that many people are very close with a couple of friends, who wind up feeling like siblings.

 

[admin001]

@sembuya This is the point that really drove it home for us. My brother and I are 3 years apart and have never been close. In fact, we aren’t even speaking right now. But I’ve been best friends with my childhood friend for almost 25 years now.

 

[sweetpeach]

@writergirlrs My baby is only 7mo but I already think about this a lot. I hear ya.

 

[holingragged]

@writergirlrs Yup, same here. With chores, work and studying, i feel like my toddler is not getting enough playtime with me as it is.

 

[janine_h25]

@writergirlrs 4 month old baby but same. Would love another, but I know better!,

 

[patie]

@writergirlrs I relate. Same, here

 

[katrina2017]

@writergirlrs Yesss about the pregnancy complications. You can't really fathom what it's like worrying about them until after you've had one without issues by the grace of God. I had a small subchorionic hematoma that I chose to put myself on modified bed rest for until it was cleared at the 24w scan. After that, I decided pelvic rest because I didn't want to chance it. Unfortunately I lost my previous pregnancy at 6w. It's insane that my son was born just shy of exactly a year later.

Nope. I want no more worry like that.

 

[abishai100]

@writergirlrs People ask how I'm so good at being alone, as an adult. I love my alone time. Being an only child trained me for me my favorite company is my own. Would I like a sibling to be close to? Sure. It would be great to have someone to be close to, period, sibling or not, but friends can feel like siblings, cousins can feel like siblings, etc.