What’s so special about months 6-12 trying unassisted?

@bella304 I definitely would advocate for getting some of the less invasive/easier testing done at the 6 month mark. I’m in the middle of my IVF cycle now after my husbands SA came back low. While it has not been a fun process, I am thankful we were able to figure out a cause and plan for it earlier on. Each month we would get a negative test was hard and I couldn’t imagine going through another 6 months just to find out there was probably no hope the whole time.
 
@tina2655 Getting my husband's SA done will be a HUGE relief. I've had everything but HSG done. He was under the impression it can take a year so has been less than enthusiastic about doing it sooner but I wanted to be pregnant by 30 with my 1st (even if that means IUI/IVF).
 
@bella304 Yeah the SA is definitely one of the easier things to cross off the list! Fingers crossed that all is fine on your end though and you have luck in the upcoming months!
 
@tina2655 Yes! If I were the penis-haver, I would have had this tested as part of an annual physical because I am a proactive planning health anxiety type A freak! My loving amazing husband is a type B, "we'll get there when we get there," only-solves-problems -when-they're-right-in-his-face type human being. We balance each other out so well 90% of the time but SHEW this has been testing us LOL
 
@bella304 If it helps I had my husband get tested before we were even trying bc I’ve had lots of people struggle with infertility & a lot of the time it is MFI. He was all for it knowing it would ease my mind. We actually got pregnant with our first fairly quickly, but are now struggling with secondary infertility due to pcos that was undiagnosed. His SA cost us less than $200 out of pocket.
 
@bella304 Another BFN for me this cycle. Was feeling honestly really numb about it. This post and the comments couldn’t have come at a better time. Thank you.
 
@bella304 Studies show that between 85-90% of couples under 30 years of age end up conceiving within one year. When you’re 35+ you can seek help after 6 months of trying. This mitigates the volume of people seeking medical intervention for something that they may not need.

However, if you or your partner have been previously diagnosed with a condition that could effect fertility such as endometriosis, PCOS, etc, then that may warrant earlier medical intervention.
 
@bella304 Most endo will not actually be a barrier to conception. Only stages 3 and 4 could have an impact on fertility. Also the only way to diagnose endo definitively is via lap, which is rather invasive and not something you want to put yourself through if you don't have to.
 
@bella304 In the absence of symptoms or a diagnosis, you would probably still need to wait the 12 months though. For the same concept as mentioned before. Bridesdilemma is correct. I’ve had 2 laps to remove stage 4 endo, and doctors still wouldn’t take me seriously lol. The protocol will still likely be to try for 12 months and undergo a laparoscopy to diagnose you with asymptomatic endo.
 
@thomasw59 Yes! We are having more than enough sex in confirmed fertile window - I've even had blood tests to confirm ovulation. That's why I'm so confused! Must just be unlucky dice rollers.
 
@bella304 I think it's math, something like a compound probability curve. Yes people will get it at less than 6 months but they are still considered in the 12 month range. Each try is an independent try but because you have tried before your overall likelihood changes each time. That said, it is a huge mental difference between 3-5 months trying and 12 months. I have absolutely loved alternative treatments and acupuncture is something I do because it doesn't focus on one part of the body but instead your entire system. Even if the acupuncture doesn't 'work' because my last cycle failed, I know I'm trending in a positive direction because I notice it improving my cycle health.
 
@bella304 Okay, my ONLY caveat to the trying for 6-12 months is that I think it’s worth getting an SA sooner rather than later. It’s not an expensive out of pocket test, and we tried for 13 cycles before finding out that my husband has no (not low, but actually zero) motility, and it never would have happened for us unassisted. I would have liked to have done the SA sooner and had a jump start on IVF since it was our only option.
 
@booklady I asked my OB at my preconception appointment when I got my IUD out for baseline testing. She did carrier screening and said "see you in a few months when you're pregnant!" This same OB is refusing testing until 12 months, so I've made a self - referral to an RE. I'm sure she has her reasons, but the gaslighting of "see you in 3 months" to now not taking me seriously is frustrating. Her nurse was like "make sure you're 100% ready, I got pregnant before I got my first period off of BC!!" So I don't feel THAT crazy for being confused.
 
@bella304 First time commenting on Reddit, so hope this is ok! I think it is reasonable to get some basic testing (SA, ultrasound, blood tests) done after 6 months of well timed intercourse. Although around half of couples will still get pregnant spontaneously before 12 months trying, the flip side of course is that half won't. We got basic testing done after 6 well-timed cycles which actually immediately threw up a concern (0% morphology in husband's sperm).
 
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