We f***ed up. Ruined sleep trained baby

[jesuslovena]

@srjoanna We had our hardest sleep regression at 2 with both our kids. Chances are, it would’ve happened regardless.

 

[srjoanna]

@jesuslovena Thanks! I just thought that it was my fault I introduced him to something he loves and then take it away. That got me ugly cried for a bit

 

[yearn4christ]

@srjoanna Oh man, I feel this so hard. This was me two months ago...
We did the 100 walks back to bed thing and it was taking about an hour each night. We did this for about 5 weeks.

We ended up getting a baby gate for his bedroom door and honestly, it took one day and 20 mins to have him back in a proper routine. I 100% regret not doing it sooner.

You didn't fuck up. Change happens. It will get easier or you'll change tact.

 

[srjoanna]

@yearn4christ Thanks! We still try to keep the bed time cuddles but cut out nap cuddles since I will have care taker for him so I cant cuddle him. In my opinion cutting anything cold turkey always works faster. Im just weak

 

[yearn4christ]

@srjoanna For sure! We do a lovely cuddly wind down with cuddles while reading books and then we sing a goodnight song with lots of cuddles in bed. My guy just feels safer with a gate on his door, apparently x

 

[6ann54]

@srjoanna Honestly, this happens to us anytime there is a change. Went to the UK for a few weeks and she was in our room with us, took a week to adjust when we got home. Had her at grandparents for a few nights when 2nd was born, adjustment period when she came back. We usually ride it out for a couple days to see if she will adjust back independently but 9/10 we end up leaving her to scream after night time routine, books and cuddles. At her age now, 23m, she will scream.. like death curdling scream for about 3-5 minutes at the door, huff then drag herself back into her bed. Next day, she is totally back to normal.

 

[stanczyk]

@srjoanna i’m feeling the same thing but about my 3 months old lol!! we didn’t ruin them

 

[tdstaats]

@srjoanna 1) Your baby isn't 'ruined', that hurts to hear.
2) My kid sometimes benefits from me laying down next to her floor bed, I've got one of those kid fort things in her room and break out the thickest pad to nap on. I limit myself to doing it for a night or two a month, I can't do more than that and not resent it so I don't.
3) She is fine on the nights I don't, I do communicate expectations though.

YMMV and your kid isn't my kid. Best of luck.

 

[icansee]

@tdstaats ymmv?

 

[tdstaats]

@icansee

ymmv

(also ymmv) written abbreviation for your mileage may vary: used, for example on social media and in text messages and emails, to mean that you understand people may have a different opinion or experience than yours: Their first album is better, but of course YMMV.

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/ymmv#

 

[valetic]

@icansee Your mileage may vary

 

[srjoanna]

@tdstaats Thanks! Im trying to see if we can keep the night time cuddles. But thats good to know that it works!

 

[sagarjackey]

@srjoanna Your first kiddo? The only thing certain is that things will certainly change. Doesn’t matter if kids are sleep trained or not, they will go through sleep regressions for the rest of their lives It’s not just the first year. Nothing to stress out about, just decide with your husband how you want to manage it. You can definitely do things differently with nighttime and naps, just need to stay consistent

 

[srjoanna]

@sagarjackey Thanks! Thats very good to hear. Ive gotten advice to cut all cuddles together but we are now too weak for it now that he can talk. We ll try to retrain only for naps as its not very sustainable for me to cuddle for naps

 

[jamila]

@srjoanna Cut out all cuddles? That's awful

 

[shihtzumom]

@srjoanna This exact situation is currently happening with our 2 yr old. What’s been sorta working is telling him way ahead of time what gonna happen that night “when it’s time to sleep, Daddy is gonna go bye bye and you’re gonna sleep in your bed alone” and we keep saying this during the evening to remind him. Then once it’s time, my husband has been telling him he’s going to leave the room and come back to check on him, which he does every 5-10 minutes. Eventually he falls asleep but it can take a while sometimes .. other days it hasn’t worked so my husband has had to stay with him. But we’re gonna keep trying and hope he’ll get the hang of it. It just takes time!

 

[bacsb00]

@shihtzumom Hi! How are things with your son now?? Currently struggling through something similar

 

[shihtzumom]

@bacsb00 So we had the idea of having him earn TV time.. he LOVES watching tv. We bought some wooden coins on Amazon and told him if he was able to stay in his bed at night alone, he would get a TV token in the morning and he could redeem it after daycare. So far it’s been working! Lol we had to explain the steps a couple times but he got the hang of it quickly. I was worried about the delayed reward since he’s little but luckily he is into earning his tv tokens to put in his wooden box. He is watching more tv now bc he’s always redeeming them daily.. the whole reward system is still a work in progress but he’s slept on his own ever since we started it! The first 2-3 nights he still cried a bit and we did go in to help comfort him but we kept reminding him about the tv tokens and hyping them up!

 

[srjoanna]

@shihtzumom Seems like around 2 the kiddos have some sleep regression. Its quite hard now that they can talk and everything which is adorable but hard to train

 

[av3nger]

@srjoanna Sleep training isn’t a one and done thing- you’ll be fine. Even my 2.5 year old we recently had to “re- sleep train” bc she kept crying in the middle of the night we come and fix her blanket or say hi. We let her cry it out one night and since then she’s back to sleeping through the night.