(Update) DHS Left A Card on My Door? (X-post from /r/Parenting

[robert244]

Long story short, someone in my tiny (12 townhouses in the whole place) apartment complex called DHS on me.

They said that when I get home with my daughter, I make her stay in her room since she's not playing outside (because it's dark and already cold by then,) and since I take my dogs out the back door where there's a ton more room (not tiny dogs) and they can't see that from where their apartment is, my house is supposedly full of dog poop and pee, and supposedly my daughter goes to school smelling like dog pee and poop. Oh, and apparently I sit on my front porch and drink and smoke cigarettes all day before I pick up my daughter. All of which is completely false.

The case worker is going to do a walk through either at the end of this week or beginning of next and closing the case as long as things are good here, which they already are because I was a ball of stress cleaning and armed with a mop all weekend.

Now I'm paranoid because someone in this complex, whom I considered a friend, has done this. I don't know who, I don't know if she could have told me and frankly, I didn't want to know. So now I'm trying to fast track getting life back in order so that I can look into moving simply because I can't trust my neighbors anymore.

Thank you all for your support and advice. I appreciate it more than I can ever put into words.

 

[yahunatan]

@robert244 What?? If I dont see kids playing outside I dont assume they've been locked in their room?? What a strange and terrible thing to think/say/accuse..

 

[robert244]

@yahunatan Apparently because I'll come outside and have a quick smoke, she must be locked in her room? Never mind the fact that she is my only child and she loves playing with her toys and makes up these elaborate scenarios and because I'd been in there playing with her for an hour before I ran outside.

 

[leaderturk]

@robert244 I mean, she's five. Of course, she's able to stay on her own in the apartment for a few minutes. If she needed you, she'd know where to find you. Hell, even my 2.5-year-old is allowed to stay alone in our apartment for a few minutes while I take a load of washing down to the laundry room.

 

[robert244]

@leaderturk I mean, that's what I thought, but apparently not.

 

[erogrers01]

@yahunatan Shit. My kids are NEVER outside cause we live in a ghetto ass little complex with cars zipping in and out and drug addicts skittering around. We go to the park when we can and we play inside. We must be awful parents too

People are petty. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this.

 

[robert244]

@erogrers01 There's a fairly sketchy couple of blocks not far from here. So we play outside from ~March-~October when it's nice and we play inside when it's cold or raining. You know, like normal people, or so I thought.

 

[blessed09]

@erogrers01 We are in the same situation. There is no just going outside for a quick walk lol.

 

[katrina2017]

@robert244 Are you sure it was from your "neighborhood"? Could it be someone that feels you have wronged them in some way?

You got this, just make sure the house is clean, she has fresh bedding and clothing, clean toys to play with and there's plenty of food for her to eat in the kitchen.

 

[robert244]

@katrina2017 I'm fairly confident that it was someone here, and with some of the things said in that report that they just don't know because they don't see that it's not the case. It could be someone else that is mad at me, but I can't think of anybody who would be THAT mad at me, ever.

 

[andrealadona]

@robert244 Are there any older people in the complex? Sometimes people who are getting dementia can start having paranoid fantasies.

 

[robert244]

@andrealadona The only older people are a gentleman with Parkinson's and his wife and two sons and a different neighbor who lives alone and keeps to herself almost completely.

 

[katrina2017]

@robert244 People can be pretty petty, it's pathetic. I'm sorry you have this added stress though. I would probably give your neighbors a little distance in the friendship department though, be friendly when you see them, but don't go out of your way to try and be friends.

 

[robert244]

@katrina2017 That's definitely what I'm doing from here on out.

 

[suzanne123]

@robert244

It could be someone else that is mad at me, but I can't think of anybody who would be THAT mad at me, ever.

Are your dogs barkers? Because it COULD be someone hoping to get DCFS to tell you to get rid of the dogs.

 

[robert244]

@suzanne123 They'll definitely bark for a few minutes when I first leave the house. I've tested that theory before and they don't really bark beyond 2-3 minutes unless someone is knocking on the door. They very rarely bark when I'm inside either.

 

[pressingthrough]

@robert244 It could be someone a bit..unstable. We had a similar situation, not nearly as serious, but growing up our nextdoor neighbor was bipolar and had some other issues, and once she had an episode where she was convinced we were abusing our animals (2 cats and a dog). She used to call animal control on us repeatedly saying we starved them, kept them outside, etc. She would also sneak into our yard and leave food outside the doghouse (which the dog DIDNT EVEN LIVE IN, it was just there for when she wanted to chill outside). Animal control showed up and were greeted at the door by 2 very chubby cats rubbing against their ankles. After that they just didn't even bother coming. Neighbor eventually got her disorder somewhat under control and we were actually friends for years haha. But sometimes people get ideas in their heads for NO reason whatsoever.

 

[robert244]

@pressingthrough I have no idea. The not knowing anything and being fearful of who I can trust in my own little complex just really sucks.

 

[bohemond]

@robert244 I know how you feel. But you and your daughter are going to be fine. ❤

 

[robert244]

@bohemond I'm really hoping so. Thank you so much.