Unmedicated birth advice

[catholic2001]

I'm due in December with our second and am hoping to birth this one unmedicated. Last time, I made it to about 6 cm before I asked for the epidural and then received it at 8 or 9 cm, so I can very clearly remember that sensation (discomfort) of labor. My doula this time suggested the body-ready method and I know there's also hypnobirthing, but I would love to hear your experiences with what worked and didn't work.

My birth goal is "healthy mom, healthy baby" so I'm flexible to potential medical situations that could require medical interventions, hopefully we have a continued healthy pregnancy and then birth. My goal with "unmedicated" is for a speedier recovery as most of my postpartum healing came from pushing on an epidural for two hours. Thank you!

 

[firewithin]

@catholic2001 When I talked to my ob about birthing without meds, his comment was that it's not about managing the pain, but it's more about staying in control and recognizing that your body is doing things it's supposed to do. That mindset really helped me. The other thing that helped me was to keep moving - as soon as they checked the fetal heartbeat when I got to the hospital, I got up and spent the major of my time walking. My last nugget is to find what helps you - I always thought the bathtub / hot shower would be great, but I actually hated it. I found the most relief from standing up and rocking my hips during contractions and rolling my hips on one of those big exercise balls. Try a bunch of different things while you're laboring and see what feels best.

 

[sferber]

@firewithin “The pain is the point” helped me a lot. The body naturally tries to reject pain, but when contractions are still mild it’s easier to get in this headspace and embrace them, which helps delay any bad mental reactions IME. It’s a mind game.

 

[auhow]

@sferber "This pain has a purpose" is really helping me, along with "Feel the power my body can produce". Registering labor pain as a powerful muscle that your body is flexing (which is true) rather than something that you are being subjected to has shifted my mind a lot. I've also been practicing giving in to pain, like any cramp or soreness that I feel now, I soften something in my mind that just basically says "okay" and I let it happen, idk how else to describe it. I guess I've been reading so much about not fighting the pain of labor that I try to use any opportunity to accept pain when it comes to get into the habit of surrendering to it

 

[calebchoi17]

@auhow Practicing now is an excellent idea!

 

[sferber]

@auhow Practicing helped me too, I was training for a half marathon before my first pregnancy and teaching my brain to run harder into the sore muscles and breathlessness during sprints was helpful for labor.

 

[firewithin]

@sferber When I first got to the hospital, a lovely nurse told me she had 7 kids herself without meds and to "think about the contraction as your body hugging the baby." While it was a nice sentiment, it was a bridge too far for me to think about it like that and I gave my husband a "this lady is nuts" look after she walked away.

 

[sferber]

@firewithin LOL. One of the midwives with my first was big on “it’s not pain it’s strength” and “every wave brings baby closer”, too touchy feely for me! There’s a point where it just fucking hurts and your brain needs it to stop. Nice try, lady.

 

[firewithin]

@sferber Right?!? Like if that really worked, epidurals wouldn't exist because we'd all just talk ourselves out of being in pain.

 

[jordan5]

@sferber "The only way out is through"

I also hated the tub! I loved the tens unit and the birth comb.

 

[sferber]

@jordan5 Yes! This was big during half marathon training and helped me in labor too. Tub was horrible for me, I loved my comb though. I hated the hip squeeze that so many women enjoy too. My midwife tried it during my last labor in April and all I could say was STOP haha.

All this to say, one of my best labor preps was a menu of distraction options. I thought I’d love the tub but it was so much worse for me. Having a list of options to roll through kept me distracted and helped me manage different stages.

 

[paddy999]

@sferber Haaaated the hip squeeze!! I didn’t want anyone to touch me at all

 

[shiney77]

@firewithin totally agree with this. that is great advice from your OB. reframing the pain as a “positive” was so important for me. i am prone to anxiety and fear when i think something is wrong (like if my knee starts hurting, oh no what if it’s xyz horrible thing?), and fear/anxiety can make pain worse. but knowing that the pain of childbirth is GOOD, and doesn’t mean anything is wrong (it means your body is working hard), helped me avoid that. there is an interview with rhea dempsey about this on the birthful podcast.

and my birth pool helped me a ton, but i also agree with finding what works for you. earlier in labor it was this random position on my bed, like on all 4s with butt in the air

 

[blushedtweety]

@shiney77 That position got me through transition!!

 

[jday]

@shiney77 Can you link the interview pls?

 

[jcano]

@firewithin I felt the SAME way. Standing/rocking hips/breathing through it/being mindful that this is what has to happen for baby to come out.

Edit to add: pushing unmedicated makes you more aware of your progress. In both births, I pushed less than 5 minutes.

 

[abnormal2001]

@jcano Same, this was definitely my experience (my midwife both times actually needed me to slow down and push less, and even so the pushing was VERY quick). In terms of resources, I found the information and the guidance around unmedicated birth and pain relief options in Penny Simkin’s The Birth Partner to be REALLY helpful. It’s written for (duh, I suppose) the partner of the birthing person but it’s a really great read.

 

[goodman916]

@firewithin I absolutely agree with your OB and with other posters. The mantra that helped me was that there's a difference between pain and suffering. If you can stay calm and feel in control, the pain is bearable and purposeful; if you panic it becomes suffering and the process becomes unpleasant.

 

[reneprays]

@goodman916 This is such a nice way of putting it! I think panic can change the pain to suffering, as can other distractions like a busy hospital, needles poking you, unfamiliar voices and opinions…protecting that labor bubble is important and it’s probably best to have your husband or a doula try to do it for you. Because in my experience very similar to OP I got an epidural I didn’t want because everything was just so hfhebdifneklajfhf around me lol

 

[hansoj]

@firewithin Just here to second “trying a bunch of things when you’re in labor.” OP seems pretty flexible but I know some people can get kind of… I can’t think of the right word… really focused on their vision of what laboring is going to look like. Like “I’m gonna be in a tub and the water is going to help and that’s what is gonna soothe me.” If someone would’ve told me “hey, have you thought about, during labor, kicking everyone out of the room and lying there and freaking out and kicking and yelling when you feel like it?” prior to my most recent birth I’d have been like “no, that sounds awful.” But that was exactly what I wanted while laboring and that’s how I felt most calm. I’m glad I gave in to that weird little desire and didn’t think “but that’s not what I pictured .”