momof2napril
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@seekinggod2 Yes! Makes a lot of sense, I feel like I need to get out half the time haha although all I usually need is a walk
Under stimulated baby: is it concerning???
- Thread starter momof2napril
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@momof2napril What everyone else said!!
As a side note - I’m starting to encounter parents like your SIL. Alllllways busy - makes me feel I don’t do enough with my kids? Then I realized - it’s a personality thing. Mostly the parents, which rubs off on the kids. Pre-kids some of my friends were ALWAYS out - visiting multiple friends in a day, in addition to running errands and seeing local events. So now that they’re parents? Same thing. Kid is in sports or something almost every night of the week; weekends are packed with play dates and big adventures. They don’t mind being that busy, and the kids seem to thrive on the insane schedules. Me? I’ve always been a calm person, and a homebody. So no surprise my kids love the playground, but are ready to go home and chill after an hour.
As long as you and baby are happy? You’re winning.
As a side note - I’m starting to encounter parents like your SIL. Alllllways busy - makes me feel I don’t do enough with my kids? Then I realized - it’s a personality thing. Mostly the parents, which rubs off on the kids. Pre-kids some of my friends were ALWAYS out - visiting multiple friends in a day, in addition to running errands and seeing local events. So now that they’re parents? Same thing. Kid is in sports or something almost every night of the week; weekends are packed with play dates and big adventures. They don’t mind being that busy, and the kids seem to thrive on the insane schedules. Me? I’ve always been a calm person, and a homebody. So no surprise my kids love the playground, but are ready to go home and chill after an hour.
As long as you and baby are happy? You’re winning.
@momof2napril Stimulation is not a direct synonym of interaction. Babies need interaction, not stimulation.
Noises, images, lights and movement are all stimulating but they serve little purposes if the baby cannot interact with them meaningfully.
Noises, images, lights and movement are all stimulating but they serve little purposes if the baby cannot interact with them meaningfully.
@momof2napril So if you would like some hard evidence about this topic I would ask in r/sciencebasedparenting about it!
That being said, my household is very calm. My daughter isn't a baby anymore but things aren't much different now. We probably have the TV on more than we used to and perhaps more than we should. And our music can be a bit more rowdy than it used to be but that's mostly because my daughter likes to have "dance parties". I believe a calm, peaceful environment is best for children. Like you we don't go go go all the time. My cousin's grew up that way and...let's just they're all kind of a mess as adults. They don't know how to just sit. I think you keep doing you. If your pediatrician was concerned or your baby wasn't meeting milestones then that would be different. But I don't believe that noisey toys and an on the go lifestyle is better for children.
That being said, my household is very calm. My daughter isn't a baby anymore but things aren't much different now. We probably have the TV on more than we used to and perhaps more than we should. And our music can be a bit more rowdy than it used to be but that's mostly because my daughter likes to have "dance parties". I believe a calm, peaceful environment is best for children. Like you we don't go go go all the time. My cousin's grew up that way and...let's just they're all kind of a mess as adults. They don't know how to just sit. I think you keep doing you. If your pediatrician was concerned or your baby wasn't meeting milestones then that would be different. But I don't believe that noisey toys and an on the go lifestyle is better for children.
momof2napril
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harrisonm7
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@momof2napril There's a difference between stimulation and chaos! How old is your baby? Hearing your voice, sensory play, books, playing outside, water play, music, shapes, colors, textures, etc all count as stimulation! Not having noisy toys or full schedules never hurt a baby. Also, quiet toys and open-ended play (eg Play-Doh, cups, blocks, sand, dolls) stimulate creativity a whole lot more than toys that repetitively do/say the same thing over and over.
momof2napril
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@harrisonm7 She’s 7 months, so she’s really getting the hang of play now. She loves when we talk, read, sing, etc. I think she’ll be perfectly fine judging by the comments here! And I love ALL the things you suggested. Her favourite thing right now if she’s totally just needing a reset and we can’t go outside or I’m busy is to put her high chair and I’ll put a silicone toy, a couple ice cubes, about 2 oz of water and some BLW appropriate veggies. She has a ball and it keeps her busy for up to 30 minutes
@momof2napril The world is stimulating! So much of any 'boring' day at home is brand new to them, and they're growing so quickly and practicing new skills in new ways constantly.
katrina2017
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@momof2napril We gradually phased out almost all flashing, shouting toys. I mean sure, you can definitely describe them as stimulating - in the same way that TikTok is stimulating to teens and adults. It can keep you entertained and hooked for hours (it's designed to do so!) but what is it really doing for you? I think most people would agree that there are much more meaningful ways to spend our time, whilst getting that mental/physical stimulation that we need.
I see battery-operated toys the same. Let's be honest here, my kid is not actually learning anything from his puppy yelling "BLUE, EIGHT, TRIANGLE!" at random. Of course it will entertain him, as that's exactly what these toys are designed for. It's all very well thought out, from the phrases, tone of voice, colours, the fact that they re-activate even when not touched. And don't get me wrong, we have a couple of those types of toys too - everything in moderation. But I noticed a massive improvement in my toddler's motor skills, language and behaviour when we moved away from those toys being the default.
Also, there's no need for kids to be buzzing all the time. I think some people see an overstimulated child as 'normal' now. A couple of people have told me that it's crazy how long my toddler can focus on an activity, but I think this comes from just practice. I try to get him toys that encourage him to carry out a task from start to end or encourage longer imaginative play. I would say those are definitely very stimulating for him, despite often being quiet activities.
I see battery-operated toys the same. Let's be honest here, my kid is not actually learning anything from his puppy yelling "BLUE, EIGHT, TRIANGLE!" at random. Of course it will entertain him, as that's exactly what these toys are designed for. It's all very well thought out, from the phrases, tone of voice, colours, the fact that they re-activate even when not touched. And don't get me wrong, we have a couple of those types of toys too - everything in moderation. But I noticed a massive improvement in my toddler's motor skills, language and behaviour when we moved away from those toys being the default.
Also, there's no need for kids to be buzzing all the time. I think some people see an overstimulated child as 'normal' now. A couple of people have told me that it's crazy how long my toddler can focus on an activity, but I think this comes from just practice. I try to get him toys that encourage him to carry out a task from start to end or encourage longer imaginative play. I would say those are definitely very stimulating for him, despite often being quiet activities.
momof2napril
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@katrina2017 Yesss this! I love how you mention kids are “buzzing” all the time, it’s I think why I always found kids very overhwhleming until I had one and have the calmest baby…
allforhim2014
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@momof2napril Oh god no. I'm into montessori and a big tenet is giving the baby time to explore themselves and their world, removing yourself and your stimulation from the equation and letting them be. There's nothing wrong with having periods of stimulating their senses, but it shouldn't be the default.
momof2napril
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@allforhim2014 Thanks! I love the Montessori methods too so I’m happy to hear it aligns 
@momof2napril You’re doing just fine! I feel strongly that maintaining a calm, low-media home environment with loads of time in nature nurtures focus, imagination, creativity and discovery of themselves and I have seen that firsthand with both my kids. My older one is in grade school this year and thriving socially and academically.
You may be interested in reading “Simplicity Parenting” which addresses exactly this issue and presents science-backed benefits to a calm, “less is more” home environment.
You may be interested in reading “Simplicity Parenting” which addresses exactly this issue and presents science-backed benefits to a calm, “less is more” home environment.
momof2napril
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@momof2napril Read. I suggest starting with your self-confident baby by Magda Gerber. Your baby does not need more stimulation than life already naturally provides. Also learning how to just be a super important skill. I think it’s some thing that has actually been getting a little bit lost nowadays but to thrive, children Should be the ones leading the activities, not the adults.
momof2napril
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@quigonj I totally agree and felt that way, I just didn’t know if I was basically “stunting” what she would be able to deal with as a child. As in I don’t want her to not be able to go to a birthday because 5 kids is too many and there’s too much noise. That can be alot but I don’t want her to totally meltdown because our house was “too” quiet
@momof2napril Stimulation is needed, but not in the way of them being constantly entertained. They also need moments to be bored in order to learn to entertain themselves. And they need moments where they are challenged to go beyond what they know already. So as long as you regularly provide stimulation like that, your child is fine.
I don’t have any direct sources to quote, but this is the advice we are given through our local government provided child services which are usually pretty science based.
From my experience (I have five younger brothers and two children of my own age 4 and 1 and some education on educating 12-18 year olds) children learn much more creative play from being bored every now and again. Younger children sometimes need help to get started on a game, but after that they can entertain themselves with seemingly boring things (like a bottle with some rice in it or wooden blocks) for half hour to hour long stretches at 1 year old. My 4 year old will tell a story with any toy that even is only half suited for it.
Stimulations to challenge your children very much depend on where your child is in their development. For my one year old it is challenging them to stand up without pulling themselves up, challenging them to try to build a tower from the blocks and not give up trying as I know they can do it with some effort. For my one year old it is requiring them to stay on task, stimulating them to help with small chores in the house even when they don’t feel like it and asking what certain letters are while reading them a book (which they can do) and sometimes asking them to put them together to form a word (which is still a challenge, to the point where you get results as that scene in Friends where Joey gets taught French).
I hope this helps to give some clarity.
I don’t have any direct sources to quote, but this is the advice we are given through our local government provided child services which are usually pretty science based.
From my experience (I have five younger brothers and two children of my own age 4 and 1 and some education on educating 12-18 year olds) children learn much more creative play from being bored every now and again. Younger children sometimes need help to get started on a game, but after that they can entertain themselves with seemingly boring things (like a bottle with some rice in it or wooden blocks) for half hour to hour long stretches at 1 year old. My 4 year old will tell a story with any toy that even is only half suited for it.
Stimulations to challenge your children very much depend on where your child is in their development. For my one year old it is challenging them to stand up without pulling themselves up, challenging them to try to build a tower from the blocks and not give up trying as I know they can do it with some effort. For my one year old it is requiring them to stay on task, stimulating them to help with small chores in the house even when they don’t feel like it and asking what certain letters are while reading them a book (which they can do) and sometimes asking them to put them together to form a word (which is still a challenge, to the point where you get results as that scene in Friends where Joey gets taught French).
I hope this helps to give some clarity.
bubbles328
New member
@momof2napril It sounds like her kids are older so this wouldn’t apply but I found the Possum’s research about the stimulation needs of babies very interesting:
https://possumsonline.com/blog/babys-sensory-hunger
https://possumsonline.com/blog/babys-sensory-hunger
@momof2napril Babies don't need A LOT of stimulation outside the home, honestly. Since EVERYTHING is new to them, they should start with home, and branch out as they get older.
That said, I firmly believe that a baby should fit into the family's lifestyle, not the other way around. So if SIL and her family love to be "go go go", then baby can absolutely adapt! If they are exhausting themselves for the sake of "stimulation" then that's silly and unsustainable. Conversely, if y'all are staying home when you'd rather go and do, then stop it! Go! Do! Have fun!
That said, I firmly believe that a baby should fit into the family's lifestyle, not the other way around. So if SIL and her family love to be "go go go", then baby can absolutely adapt! If they are exhausting themselves for the sake of "stimulation" then that's silly and unsustainable. Conversely, if y'all are staying home when you'd rather go and do, then stop it! Go! Do! Have fun!
@momof2napril It’s the opposite. You might not judge your SIL but I’m judging her 
The entire world is new to a baby, so they get all their stimulation and sensory stuff from the world around them.
The entire world is new to a baby, so they get all their stimulation and sensory stuff from the world around them.