Hey all thanks for replying.
Here is the exact text exchange:
Me: M just said he was scared this morning because you took the kids to the bus stop and let him stay home and it was 30 minutes late
Her: Indeed
Me: Okay I'm assuming R or someone is home at the time right lol
Her: It's hard for him to walk to the bus stop with us in the mornings, and it's been pretty rainy lately so he likes to stay home and watch TV while I walk them to the bus stop. Usually it takes about 20 minutes from the time I leave til the time I get back. Today it was 45 minutes and I had to make a decision halfway in, whether to leave D and L at the bus stop to wait, or have M wait longer than usual. I was going to leave L and D but when I weighed the chances of something bad happening to anybody, I felt that it would be safer to stay with them until the bus got there. There are not a lot of potentially horrible things that may have happened to him at home, and I felt that he was safer there by himself than L and D would have been by themselves at the bus stop
Her: It was not something that happened intentionally, and i literally ran home as soon as i saw the bus coming around the corner. And no, he's by himself in the morning when he chooses not to go to the bus stop. He's been responsible and made good choices, and normally he's not scared. When it's raining I'm not gonna force him to walk 20 minutes in the rain if he doesn't want to. He's not a baby, I know it's a weird concept, but normally he's fine for 20 minutes
Me: I can't tell you what to do but I don't let him stay home for the 6 minutes it takes me to get (my stepdaughter) to her bus. It's difficult walking somewhere in a timely fashion but maybe a wagon or something he can sit in. I know it's not malicious but I would feel a lot more comfortable knowing he goes with you to the bus stop. Like you said there's minimum risk but there's still risk.
Her: I think he should be able to choose for himself man, 6 minutes in the rain is a lot different than 20. I ask him every morning if he wants to get dressed and go with us and usually he doesn't. In my opinion it is an acceptable level of independence and it builds trust between us. However, yes, this morning was bullshit so I'll try to remind him that the bus can be late next time when he says he wants to stay home
Here is the exact text exchange:
Me: M just said he was scared this morning because you took the kids to the bus stop and let him stay home and it was 30 minutes late
Her: Indeed
Me: Okay I'm assuming R or someone is home at the time right lol
Her: It's hard for him to walk to the bus stop with us in the mornings, and it's been pretty rainy lately so he likes to stay home and watch TV while I walk them to the bus stop. Usually it takes about 20 minutes from the time I leave til the time I get back. Today it was 45 minutes and I had to make a decision halfway in, whether to leave D and L at the bus stop to wait, or have M wait longer than usual. I was going to leave L and D but when I weighed the chances of something bad happening to anybody, I felt that it would be safer to stay with them until the bus got there. There are not a lot of potentially horrible things that may have happened to him at home, and I felt that he was safer there by himself than L and D would have been by themselves at the bus stop
Her: It was not something that happened intentionally, and i literally ran home as soon as i saw the bus coming around the corner. And no, he's by himself in the morning when he chooses not to go to the bus stop. He's been responsible and made good choices, and normally he's not scared. When it's raining I'm not gonna force him to walk 20 minutes in the rain if he doesn't want to. He's not a baby, I know it's a weird concept, but normally he's fine for 20 minutes
Me: I can't tell you what to do but I don't let him stay home for the 6 minutes it takes me to get (my stepdaughter) to her bus. It's difficult walking somewhere in a timely fashion but maybe a wagon or something he can sit in. I know it's not malicious but I would feel a lot more comfortable knowing he goes with you to the bus stop. Like you said there's minimum risk but there's still risk.
Her: I think he should be able to choose for himself man, 6 minutes in the rain is a lot different than 20. I ask him every morning if he wants to get dressed and go with us and usually he doesn't. In my opinion it is an acceptable level of independence and it builds trust between us. However, yes, this morning was bullshit so I'll try to remind him that the bus can be late next time when he says he wants to stay home
, so giving him a reminder that the bus might be late doesn't take into account the fact that he's only 5 and can't possibly imagine the dangerous choices he could make during that extended time.