"The Wagon Stroller Will be a Waste of Money Without a Sibling..."

@snpdoll11 Wow, your hubs, just... wow. Mine also says some boneheaded stuff sometimes and I just throw him a look that he knows to stfu.

Also the wagons are great. We carted my niece around in hers when we were camping. We put a pillow and blankie in it for a comfy place for her to chill by the fire.
 
@anton1 Wouldn't put it past him but, I think we'd have to actually be making any sort of physical contact with each other for that to be a concern.

But also, I have a copper Paragaud IUD all up in me. Besides which, even WITH that I would never consider doing the mattress dance without a condom.

One time he did get all snuggly with me and THEN sprung it on me that he had run out of condoms and I was alike "Ah...ok...give me space then."

Actually I think he started to get put off by the fact that I am now so overly cautious about pregnancy, even occasionally darting straight from bed to the store for Plan B, if I had any doubts that our contact had been fully protected.

And I think he's also a little put off by my weight gain, as he told me that I look like an escaped Jurassic Park exhibit.

But yeah...anyways...neither of us has got lucky in a very long time. (Except that I am pretty lucky that I look like a dinosaur. I consider that lucky because I do love dinosaurs tbh.)
 
@anton1 X,D I swear to God, right after he told me that insult I ordered a T-shirt which has a picture of a T-Rex eating some guys and it says "Emotional Eater" on it. It's the bomb, it's literally one of my favorite shirts.

It gave him a big, annoyed eye-roll too which was funny.
 
@snpdoll11 There are deep issues going on here….

…trying to make things difficult for you so that you’d decide to be a stay at home mom?

Almost sounds abusive…what kind of a sick fuck tries to manipulate someone into having more children or being a stay at home parent?

I would not trust him not to try to get you pregnant against your will.

What are you doing for BC?
 
@dosto "There are deep issues going on here…."

I am trying...not to laugh at the obviousness of the statement. ...But appreciate the concern.

"What are you doing for BC?"

Abstinence. It is the most effective form of birth control, after all.

(But I also have a copper Paraguard IUD, you know... in case of the unthinkable or whatever).
 
@snpdoll11 The other day I saw a mom with her boy, he must have been around 4 or so, they stopped on a shaded area, the wagon was one of those that could have the side removed and they both sat down on it to enjoy some snacks. Not gonna lie, it looked pretty cool and I'm tempted to get one just like that.
 
@snpdoll11 I love our wagon! Small coolers, stuffed friends, and sometimes actual human friends join our son in it! We got the Radio Flyer one where one side comes down so he will sit in it while we eat out, space permitting.
 
@snpdoll11 Thanks for your very funny post. I relate since having a kid caused marriage strain and it’s husband who wants another. I wish I had your confidence and resolve though. I’m still on the fence a little.

Anyway so I had super high blood pressure after having my son- I forget what but the top number was over 200- and apparently had a brain bleed. Then I had postpartum anxiety and psychosis. My brain broke. I was in the hospital for 3 weeks. I went in convinced my son was dying, and spent weeks away from him against my will. Even once I was home, baby stage was something to be survived, not enjoyed.

Husband thinks it would be better this time because we know what to look out for and will get help early.
I don’t understand how he can be so cavalier about this knowing what we went through.
Even now, though I love my 20mo son and his giggles when we play peek a boo, I just want to relax on the weekends and be left alone to read my book.
 
@muya Wow! I didn't even go through half of what you've gone through and even my brain broke from all the stress of the early years of childrearing.

I had OCD (even prior to my son being born) and it did get A LOT worse after my son was born. I didn't get on medication because I was nursing (and couldn't transition my son to formula because of his food allergies). I think my therapist was trying her best but the severity of my symptoms were a little outside her wheelhouse.

But yes, due to my OCD I was always convinced my son was dying. Especially fearing that I had fucked up or would fuck up and cause him some kind of harm.

And I didn't even get enough time to myself to see her in person, (or go anywhere besides home and work) we started doing phone appointments once my son was born (and this was pre-covid)

I actually did get really close to suicide.

I'm not going back to that whole place...

Honestly, in the months after my son was born I did get REALLY close to having another kid. And it wasn't because I wanted one, it was because I wanted to get it out of the way.

And because the more time I let pass was more time tacked onto the end, you know? Like, if I had another kid right now, while my son is three, my childrearing will be 21 long instead of 18 years. And you know, if I had a child now, I would have six total diaper changes years instead of three.

...You see the logic hear, I'm sure. I was the sort of kick who always chose a quick paddling over a long grounding.

Anyhow, now I'm thankful that I didn't do that. So very thankful that I didn't have another, in those confused months of dark despair.

For me, the baby stage was also just about survival. Nothing about it was enjoyed. If I woke up and found that my son had been a dream all along...the relief I would have felt. And would have run screaming from my husband.

My husband ALSO claims it will be better this time. HA! When I say "Things are starting to get better" he says "Now that you see that there's an end in sight, it will not be so bad for you the next time. Because you'll know that it will eventually get better."

HA! THE VERY FUCKING AUDACITY!

"I don’t understand how he can be so cavalier about this knowing what we went through."

It's because he didn't go through it himself. Did you see Alien Covenant? How can David be so Cavalier when Oram get's chestburst? Because, after wheedling and reassuring him with his gift of gab and his beauty to coax Oram into a dangerous situation, he's just using Oram's body to advance his own agenda. Doesn't care at all the pain or danger caused to Oram. You see?

Anyhow...if you want my input. ...Not that you do... I would strongly advise against relenting to your husband's demands.

Also, would you like to be friends? It's cool if no, but let me know if you'd ever like to chat or become pen pals or talk about movies or books or anything.
 
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