@lizzieb90 My daughter didn't go to preschool and it was fine.
No preschool?
- Thread starter lizzieb90
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- rant stay-at-home parents
@lizzieb90 My oldest is 5 and is only in preschool this year. It's also only twice a week from 9-12. Do what is right for your family. For us, waiting was what we thought was best. I want the time with her and children learn very well from just being home playing and exploring nature and helping mom cook. There are so many benefits. I don't think there is a "wrong" choice here. But I'm very happy with our decision. You do what's best for your family.
@lizzieb90 IMO, people who are asking about preschool for a under-1 are actually asking about daycare. I don’t care if you call it “school.” Also, I don’t think under 1-year-olds should be in school.
I do think there’s some benefit to having a school like experience before kindergarten, however. Not necessarily full time, but having that experience can really help with the transition to school-school. A lot of kindergarten is (age appropriate) high level learning in many districts, so not having any school like experience before starting that full time would be a huge jump for most kids.
Of course, at the end of the day, you know your kiddo best!
I do think there’s some benefit to having a school like experience before kindergarten, however. Not necessarily full time, but having that experience can really help with the transition to school-school. A lot of kindergarten is (age appropriate) high level learning in many districts, so not having any school like experience before starting that full time would be a huge jump for most kids.
Of course, at the end of the day, you know your kiddo best!
captainrogers20
New member
@lizzieb90 It's your choice! My daughter really blossomed in preschool and she wouldn't have been able to handle all day kindergarten without it. But it was only 2.5 hours a day. Not enough time to work. I ran errands and walked the dog.
Some preschools are low cost and the social aspect is huge. We waited until 4 to do preschool, because our cut off date here is late, they have to be 5 by July.
Some preschools are low cost and the social aspect is huge. We waited until 4 to do preschool, because our cut off date here is late, they have to be 5 by July.
abortionnyc
New member
@lizzieb90 I had fully planned on skipping preschool, but as my son is getting closer to 3 (end of May), it’s clear how much he would benefit from it. We’re going to start him this August and it’ll be Monday and Wednesday 8-11:30 so it’s super part time. I’m due with #2 in March but this didn’t factor into the preschool decision. Mostly I want to make sure that kindergarten isn’t such a shock for him. If he hates preschool we’ll pull him from it.
@lizzieb90 My son goes to "preschool" two days a week for 2.5 hours at a local rec center. It's perfect for us! Most of the moms are sahm so we keep the kids home when they're sick so we haven't had any preschool illnesses which is nice. Also, it's only $100 a month which obviously is a steal. My son gets socialization, and learns to listen to other adults. I also struggled with being away from him, and definitely sobbed the first few times, but it's much easier now. Win win.
@lizzieb90 My daughter who is 4 goes to school half days M-F . It’s only 15 hours a week. She’s made loads of friends , learns so much, she absolutely loves it. I’d be a crappy homeschool teacher and she wouldn’t get enough socialization nap trapped with me and the baby. When we all go out together I’m basically in survival mode trying to keep everyone in the same place and safe so it’s hardly quality time . Preschool is amazing and you don’t have to send them full time !
@lizzieb90 There is difference between preschool and full time daycare. Full time daycare includes preschool. However there’s preschool programs that are typically two half days a week for much lower cost. The program typically cost for one month less than a week of daycare.
Another option if that’s too expensive is to get involved in your local libraries ready for kindergarten story time and programs.
Another option if that’s too expensive is to get involved in your local libraries ready for kindergarten story time and programs.
@lizzieb90 We have 2 kids and we didn’t send either one to preschool. I did a lot of learning activities on my own with my kids at home. I feel like people thought because I stayed at home that I did nothing with my kids so I had to send them to preschool. I always hated the way people would always ask about preschool.
@lizzieb90 We’re not doing preschool. I’m homeschooling my kids, and he does plenty of other things to socialize with other kids (park, zoo, soccer, library, etc).
@lizzieb90 As a teacher, I can tell the kids who have gone to preschool versus the ones who haven’t. I don’t believe in putting littles in school full time starting at age 3, but a few days per week of a play-based program does wonders to get kids ready to be part of a classroom community.
I’m not super worried about academic readiness, but the social and emotional aspects of being in preschool are critical in my opinion. Sadly, we no longer do enough play or social-emotional activities in most kindergarten classes because of the academic demands (another conversation for another day). So if kids don’t come in ready with those skills, they may not be able to catch up. Students who struggle socially and emotionally tend to also struggle academically by the time they are in 3rd/4th grade because they lack coping skills, perseverance, etc.
For my family, we chose 3 days of a play-based preschool that focuses heavily on social development, spends a large portion of their day outside, and engages kids in process art. We started fairly recently and I already see a huge difference in her independence and focus. This will also allow me to have one in one time with our second who is coming soon!
You might consider looking into co-op preschools, which are generally low cost (mostly just materials fees) and utilize parent involvement to function. There is a great one in our area that we looked into but it just wasn’t feasible for us because it was a bit too far.
Best of luck!
I’m not super worried about academic readiness, but the social and emotional aspects of being in preschool are critical in my opinion. Sadly, we no longer do enough play or social-emotional activities in most kindergarten classes because of the academic demands (another conversation for another day). So if kids don’t come in ready with those skills, they may not be able to catch up. Students who struggle socially and emotionally tend to also struggle academically by the time they are in 3rd/4th grade because they lack coping skills, perseverance, etc.
For my family, we chose 3 days of a play-based preschool that focuses heavily on social development, spends a large portion of their day outside, and engages kids in process art. We started fairly recently and I already see a huge difference in her independence and focus. This will also allow me to have one in one time with our second who is coming soon!
You might consider looking into co-op preschools, which are generally low cost (mostly just materials fees) and utilize parent involvement to function. There is a great one in our area that we looked into but it just wasn’t feasible for us because it was a bit too far.
Best of luck!
katrina2017
New member
@javetuka When I mentioned the prohibitive cost of preschool in my HCOL area, many people suggested a co-op. My issue with that is, if you have younger children, who is supposed to care for them while you're working at the school once or twice a week? If I have to hire a sitter every time, that's going to cancel out most of the savings.
@katrina2017 The ideal situation is finding a coop that has other SAHPs involved and switching off watching the younger kids while the parent does their duty day. For younger babies sometimes the moms would just bring them and wear them in a carrier during their shift. And we only had duty days twice a month because there was always at least 1 paid teacher there. The other volunteer hours were made up of meetings, fundraising, cleaning days, or small jobs like getting library books for the classroom or making the play dough etc. Which can be done at other times when the other parent is home.
@javetuka Thank you for this outlook! I have mentioned to my partner if we do go the preschool route, it will be mainly for her to learn what is expected in terms of structure through out the day. Listening to other adults, having a schedule that she needs to follow and being in a social setting would be super beneficial.
The more comments I read, the more I’m leaning towards pre-k probably around age 4 for a couple days a week. I am not the most social person, and I want my kid to thrive without thinking I’m holding her back in any way
The more comments I read, the more I’m leaning towards pre-k probably around age 4 for a couple days a week. I am not the most social person, and I want my kid to thrive without thinking I’m holding her back in any way
@lizzieb90 My mom didn’t put me in preschool.
I don’t think it made a difference. At the time it gave me anxiety to know other kids did go but it wasn’t something that was supper impacting to me.
I don’t think it made a difference. At the time it gave me anxiety to know other kids did go but it wasn’t something that was supper impacting to me.
theycallmejt
New member
@lizzieb90 All 5 of my kids did GREAT in kindergarten and NONE of them went to preschool. 
We didn’t do anything special. We prioritized reading to them, doing the shape sorter, counting things organically (grapes at lunch, etc), and having LOTS of talks. We encouraged coloring and drawing (fine motor skills are a real thing), and our kids got good socialization twice a week at church groups.
You do you, mama. You’ll be fine.
We didn’t do anything special. We prioritized reading to them, doing the shape sorter, counting things organically (grapes at lunch, etc), and having LOTS of talks. We encouraged coloring and drawing (fine motor skills are a real thing), and our kids got good socialization twice a week at church groups.
You do you, mama. You’ll be fine.
annmarhanno
New member
@lizzieb90 I didn’t go to preschool but I’m determined to do better than my parents did. My son is now 5 and he’s been going to preschool for 2 years and it’s been great for his social skills and how to behave in a classroom. I’m a lazy ass mom so I have to supplement somehow . I’m just not one of those moms who wants to take him to a park everyday or go to playdates. I feel like he will be greeted at kindergarten because school will not be shocking to him. He’s pretty excited to go be a big boy at school.
. I’m just not one of those moms who wants to take him to a park everyday or go to playdates. I feel like he will be greeted at kindergarten because school will not be shocking to him. He’s pretty excited to go be a big boy at school.@lizzieb90 We aren't sending our three kids to preschool. Our oldest will be attending kindergarten in the fall and I know I felt the judgment about not sending ours as well, but I'm happy with the choice now.
What we've done with our oldest to get experience away from me and having to get instruction from another adult is get her into swimming lessons as well as a children's class our zoo offers (parents don't need to attend her age group). We'll sign up for any other classes like this we can find.
My kids do fine with socializing but my biggest fear was how they'd handle being away from me and having to listen to another adult they don't personally know. But these two classes they'll all attend puts me at ease.
It's funny tho how it seems like everyone expects you to get your kids out of the house and away from you as quick as possible. You do you and stay strong
What we've done with our oldest to get experience away from me and having to get instruction from another adult is get her into swimming lessons as well as a children's class our zoo offers (parents don't need to attend her age group). We'll sign up for any other classes like this we can find.
My kids do fine with socializing but my biggest fear was how they'd handle being away from me and having to listen to another adult they don't personally know. But these two classes they'll all attend puts me at ease.
It's funny tho how it seems like everyone expects you to get your kids out of the house and away from you as quick as possible. You do you and stay strong
carlthedreamer
New member
@lizzieb90 Why do people feel like they have any right to an opinion about how you raise your kids? Luckily, I’ve yet to experience such assholery. I’m still undecided about preschool. I MIGHT do it if there’s a convenient local program, otherwise I’ll purchase a preschool curriculum and do it myself. It depends on how my daughter feels about it when the time comes.
recklessabandon
New member
@lizzieb90 First of all, your cousin is rude. It's not silly at all.
We tried preschool a couple months after my baby turned 3-years-old. He spent about two weeks there and did not care for it at all. He didn't like his teacher. He was having accidents there, but not at home. And they were fibbing on the app regarding how much he ate during breakfast and snack.
We pulled him out with no regrets.
I don't think we will send him back until he shows interest in it. That is, if he ever does.
Keep your baby home with you if that's where you feel they belong!
We tried preschool a couple months after my baby turned 3-years-old. He spent about two weeks there and did not care for it at all. He didn't like his teacher. He was having accidents there, but not at home. And they were fibbing on the app regarding how much he ate during breakfast and snack.
We pulled him out with no regrets.
I don't think we will send him back until he shows interest in it. That is, if he ever does.
Keep your baby home with you if that's where you feel they belong!