My child has been bitten twice in the last 2 weeks at Pre-K

[alisonhansford]

My child is 4going in five. Her Pre- K class is all 4/5 year olds. You must be at least 4 to start in her class. My child goes to school full days 5 days a week.
Staring in October I would pick her up and she would complain about 1 certain kid being mean to her. She also told me who it was. Being mean as pushing and hitting her. I told teacher she told teacher they said they would take care of it. Last day before thanksgiving break she got bit on the upper lip and it drew blood. She had to been seen and got antibiotics.

We had a meeting with administrators and teacher and they said they have a plan in place. I trusted the teachers and was like okay it happens we will see how it goes. Well today-12/13 I get a call she has been bitten on the stomach- left teeth marks and broke the skin. We are stuck on removing her and finding a different pre-k or what to do. And yes it is the same kid. The teacher and my child has also said he just walked up to her and bit her.

Any advice is helpful.

 

[luke2017]

@alisonhansford I find the fact that blood was drawn concerning. At least in my state if a bite leads to blood being drawn both children need to be tested for bloodborne diseases and a report needs to be made to licensing.

Bites are common with younger children, but less common with 4 and 5 year Olds. Bites that draw blood are even less common and should be treated very seriously.

Everyone is right, it shouldn't be on you to find a new Pre-K. On the other hand I'm not sure I'd feel safe with the way this is being handled.

 

[vincentodiaz]

@luke2017 I feel the same way like…okay an 18 month old biting…fine…4 or 5 years old??? Those kids are BIG and have all their teeth, to me this is physical abuse. Not to mention human bites are huge sources for infection. It is completely unacceptable this isn’t being taken more seriously, and I agree you should ask to see their behavior policy and ask for a plan in place to protect your daughter. If they can’t provide that I would be exploring options to leave for your daughters safety and well-being and tell them that.

 

[dreamer555]

@alisonhansford Ask them what their bite policy is. Our school has a strict 3 strikes policy.

 

[alisonhansford]

@dreamer555 Ooo that’s a good one. I was gonna ask about bullying but didn’t even think about a biting policy.

 

[dreamer555]

@alisonhansford Definitely check! Every preschool I’ve taught at has had a bite policy. I think my son’s school even has a separate policy for bites that break the skin.

 

[alisonhansford]

@dreamer555 I just went through my handbook and I didn’t see any biting policy just a bullying one so I’m def going to have to ask.

 

[slysly]

@alisonhansford Maybe peruse a few other handbooks that are available online so when you go in to talk, you can be more specific about what is standard for daycares around you and ask better questions about their own policies. If they don't have a bite-specific policy, ask what policies they do have in place that are meant to address biting (like if their bullying policy includes biting).

It's suuuuch a normal behavior for this age that they should be pretty well-versed in handling it by now and I'm sorry you've had it happen a few times already.

 

[haruchi]

@dreamer555 Does the policy take into consideration disabilities? If the kid is diagnosed with autism or ED or something, can they be kicked out? Especially if it's a public/government funded program?

 

[dreamer555]

@haruchi I’ve only taught at private preschools that did not have the services needed to teach any students with disabilities.

I have taught in public elementary school though and even then we had policies in place for biting. Students couldn’t be kicked out but they were moved to a different class or given an aide.

 

[haruchi]

@dreamer555 Yea, I work in an elementary school in NYC. Public Pre-K is universal.

There are "policies" about biting, but unfortunately it's still very difficult. You need parental consent to start an evaluation. A large portion of kids are in foster care and their parents need to be tracked down.

You need a lot of data. You need a full evaluation. You need parents to accept the IEP. You need to get funding for and hire a para.

I agree that it should be a lot more immediate. But when you have public school and parents who refuse to admit to anything is wrong, the school's only recourse is legal action, and lots of red tape.

 

[elijah13]

@haruchi If it’s a public program it’s a lot harder to get kicked out. A lot of preschools (at least where I am) are private though

 

[lorynp]

@alisonhansford Most daycares have a three times and your out rule. That child should be removed, not yours. I went through something similar with my kiddo.

 

[tomato777]

@lorynp As a former teacher to an EXTEME biter one year (like 10-15 attempts a day), I would have been so happy if our administration implemented a rule like this. Having to one-on-one a child when you have literally 10 others and only one other teacher? That’s bullshit right there. Teachers don’t get paid enough to shadow one kid.

 

[vfirestormv]

@tomato777 Right? We had a little girl one year we called Vampira because she bit at least one kid every day. Nothing ever happened.

 

[terranova]

@tomato777 There is also a difference between a two year old biting and a four year old biting. Neither one is ok, but I had a four year old in one of my daycare classes that would.not.stop.

Like a lot of kids that age bit…sometimes. But it was pretty much every day. It was exhausting, especially since most of the kids were starting to leave that phase behind.

Another thing is that when you have a kid that does that, it seems to reintroduce the idea to other kids. Like I said, four year olds do bite, but not to the level of kids younger by a year or two.

Both classes this little one went to had kids start biting more afterwards. His family seemed nice and he was a sweet kid otherwise. We had no idea what was going on. His parents definitely seemed to be trying.

 

[tomato777]

@terranova That is very true. I’d never expect it from a four year old. But even so, a two year old doing it as often as this tiny gentleman is no picnic and ruins a class.

 

[terranova]

@tomato777 Yeah, I edited my comment to add a bit more detail. It gets awful when everyone is just run ragged trying to make sure the jaws of life isn’t unleashed all day.

 

[tomato777]

@terranova Oh yeah. My Apple Watch would compliment me on my workout by 11:30am and I ended up throwing my back out. And it was impossible to stop every single bite. It was rare we’d get them all so even after killing ourselves all day, we’d still have to report to 2+ parents and the administration that did nothing to help.

 

[terranova]

@tomato777 I know admin and parents are often in a difficult situation, and parents are at their wits end and desperate. I get admin having pity for a family needing childcare.
It I just at a certain point, it really becomes unfair to other kids. I have run into that with similar situations

Good luck