Morning routine inspiration

[blessingsbe]

I am looking for some perspectives and ideas in order to get inspiration for a change in our morning routine, ideally from parents of children 3 to 8.

Background: currently with three kids (2 - 4 - 6). They wake up around 6 AM and need to be out of the house by 8 AM. During those two hours the main objectives are getting dressed and having breakfast.

The issue is that they recently got hooked on TV. The first thing they do as soon as they get to the living room is to turn on the screens. The older ones watch Netflix cartoons and the younger Cocomelon on a tablet.

I'm not against some TV time, nor against dumb fun - I think it's fine as long as it's balanced with deeper concerns. However, I don't like the idea of them spending 90 minutes every morning passively watching video content. To complicate the issue, I benefit from the fact that they are quiet and out of my way and that allows me to get ready myself and to prepare all the things for them (breakfast, grab clothes, prep lunch, etc.) If screens are off, chaos is on.

So what do kids do in the morning besides watching TV (and that doesn't involve constant monitoring and intervention)?

P.S. : Partner has a somewhat non standard schedule and I can't count on their help for more than a couple of morning a week.

 

[oceansedge]

@blessingsbe My kids are about the same age - plus I have an ADHD 10 year old. Excluding my 2 year old, I have a rule that no one is allowed out of bed before 6:30 and then they have to be done with their morning routine before any screens are turned on. This means:

- Dressed for school including shoes (They have a bin with pre-selected clothes for the week)

- Teeth & hair brushed

- Lunch, water & backpack ready for school (I pack bento boxes the night before and refrigerate their filled water bottles, they are responsible for ice packs and getting it in the back pack).

- Room & bathroom picked up (I don't care if their bed is made)

- Breakfast in hand (they can make/get cereal, frozen waffles, yogurt and muffins themselves).

This helps make them responsible for themselves AND allows them to have a productive morning before being rewarded with some before school screen down time. It doesn't always go perfectly but it moves us and them in the right direction.

 

[blessingsbe]

@oceansedge Thanks for the detailed reply! This is exactly the kind of answer I was looking for. I shall definitely use a few of these elements in our routine going forward.

 

[skepticaldaniel]

@blessingsbe It sounds like you have your answer. I'm not against TV either but I think it's really shooting yourself in the foot to introduce it when you're trying to get something else done. My kids at least are incapable of splitting focus like that. Can they watch TV when they get home/when there is legitimate down time?

 

[blessingsbe]

@skepticaldaniel Right, but if there's no TV how exactly do the kids keep busy? I am afraid that with TV off I will spend all morning supervising them, helping them, refereeing, etc. and I won't be able to get anything done.

 

[vote4waifu]

@blessingsbe I find that I have to get up before the kids get up to have a chance of getting anything done. Also I do as much as possible the night before. We’ve also fallen prey to the siren song of screen time before, but the meltdowns when it had to go away and the way it made their general behaviour worse wasn’t worth it for me

 

[322014]

@blessingsbe Involve them! Kids are innately interested in being involved, helping out, being useful. Our 3 year old has helped prepare breakfast and unload the dishwasher since he was barely over 2. Every day he grinds the beans for my coffee (well, I measure them and he presses the button). At first this sort of thing does require some monitoring, but all of your kids are capable and they’ll get there quickly. They feel helpful, you can delegate random household things that need to be done, and everyone ends up with some added agency around the morning routine. We swear by this; I hope you can find some piece of this that works for you as well!

 

[sarahrachel]

@blessingsbe We have this problem too... We just bought a yoto as an alternative and the older kids also play in the morning (3, 2, 6mo twins)

 

[blessingsbe]

@sarahrachel Thank you so much! First time I hear about the yoto, will definitely look into it.

 

[bobby28]

@blessingsbe I let my kids watch tv in the morning, but it’s limited and they need to share the screen. One show each, and then the tv gets turned off. This gives me enough time to get breakfast ready. I also know that my kids need to run around after watching tv, so I send them outside in our backyard to reset.

 

[blessingsbe]

@bobby28 Thanks for the reply. I will try one show each and see how it goes!

 

[marke2]

@blessingsbe We don't have a TV, but I have a similar problem to you with my kids reading. So they are now responsible for packing their own snacks and backpacks, checking the school lunch menu to see if they like that day's lunch, and helping prepare an alternate lunch if they don't.

I also focus on one or two kids at a time in the order they need to leave. So 7:55 bus needs to be ready before 8:15 walkpool and he needs to be ready before 8:35 carpool.

My husband is rarely home in the mornings, and when he is, he's at morning services 630 until 7:30 and needs to leave by 8:35. I work afternoons so I don't eat breakfast (except maybe coffee some days) until after morning carpool, which simplifies the rush.

 

[wren84]

@blessingsbe I have never let any of my kids watch tv that early. It disrupts their mood for the day usually. Definitely no iPad either. They go outside in the morning. They just play. Maybe by 4 pm they’ll watch a nature show. I make my coffee and take it outside on to the patio and hold the baby while the three older kids play.

If screens are off chaos is on because of the screens in the first place in my opinion. It disrupts mood and behavior. Especially content like coco melon. It’s so overstimulating and just not something that I find adds any value to our lives,

 

[blessingsbe]

@wren84 Thanks for the input. It is this "they just play" scene that I have a hard time imagining. What exactly happens? If I were to try that, the 2 year old would climb on any unattended higher surface (couch, chair, stool....) and fall on his head; the 4 year old will provoke and steal things from the 6 year old; and the latter will scream and retaliate by pinching and hitting.

 

[wren84]

@blessingsbe I find that when you cut screens out almost entirely they just stop doing that stuff. I have kids the same age, literally almost exact. 2 year old 3.5 year old and 6 year old. They really do just play.
They get along when they get used to having to get along.

 

[roger1234]

@blessingsbe I recently introduced an alarm clock with multiple alarms (different noises). We have a wakeup alarm- you can be awake before the wakeup sound but you DO NOT GO WAKE ANYONE ELSE UP, and quiet independent play activities are allowed but no tv. Then we have a "put on your shoes" alarm 10 minutes before we leave. The put on your shoes alarm has been surprisingly effective, and now they harass me to get my shoes on

Kids are 5, 3, 2 and 4mo so we'll see if it scales as they get older

ETA: quiet independent play before the wakeup alarm. They just play with each other after everyone is up once they're done with getting ready activities