Kids are dropping the N-Word

@nathanstrong Oh boy lol so glad I read the whole thing and to most that are confused, the “n word” is not the adult “n word.” 🤣
Anyway, they’re gonna say it outside of the house and when you’re not around. So, you need to either inform them from an emotional perspective. Look up the word, figure out what feelings it can provoke and talk to your kid about how it makes people feel when they’re called that. Tel other there’s words that are just not kind. Even if they don’t mean for it to be mean or un kind, they are. If that doesn’t work, tel l them the rule is not to say it in the house and if they get sucker punched for calling a kid that word…. It’s on them. 🤷‍♂️
Either way, they’re still gonna drop those kids of words. In my day we used a lot worse words that were not racial but still pretty mean as a form of teasing each other in sports or games. Yes, I could have said other words but I was a kid and didn’t understand that yet and didn’t really understand what the words actually meant.
 
@tmichaelcart As far as I know, they don't know the racial slur beginning with N. There are several words that we strongly dissuade the kids from saying; Hate, Kill, Stupid to name a few. Now, when one of the kids wants to tattle on a sibling, they will say he or she said the H-Word, the K-Word or the S-Word. The first time one of them said S-Word to me, I had to ask for clarification.

This evening, Minecraft was on. My 7 year old had forgotten some basic things, so my 5 year old started calling her a n00b. After the 15th time or so in a 90 second period, I pulled the plug on n00b. So the 5 year old, without missing a beat, started calling her an "N-Word," the N being for the word n00b he wasn't supposed to say.

While I wasn't crazy about the n00b I was actively dismayed about his choice for a replacement. The OP was more about unintended consequences than having to beat the David Duke out of my kids.
 
@nathanstrong You really had us in the first half there...

Most E and T rated titles these days have the ability to disable voip and chat, i don't know about micecraft but the switch does have the ability to disable all communication in games through patental controls.
 
@nathanstrong Tbh we were banned from words as kids, including “stupid”, “hate”, “liar”, “random” and “idiot” (lol). We would have been in equal trouble if we carried on using those words as “s word”, “h word” etc. I think you need to focus on the concept (“that’s a strong idea/feeling, we don’t talk about your brother like that it’s unkind”) and why that’s wrong, otherwise you’re still giving the word power. Plus if they can’t use any variation they’ll eventually move on to a new word
 
@nathanstrong So in trying to stop them using a completely harmless, arguably mildly funny insult, you've accidentally just made them sound like a bunch of racists?

Also:

we've told them we don't use the word kill in the house and he's been reporting his brother for saying the "K-Word"

WTF? I get wanting kids not to use profanity, but that's literally just a harmless, inoffensive word that you've banned because you don't like thinking about the concept.

You and your partner kind of went from accidental goofballs to draconian crazy people in one sentence there.
 
@nathanstrong Lol I don’t want you to think that I’m telling you how to raise your kids, but calling each other newbs is harmless.

Science says for the most part, children should be left to figure out how they want to interact with their siblings, unless it becomes physical or overly abusive, but that doesn’t sound like what was going in your situation, and I personally would have refrained from intervening. Just some food for thought. Do with it what you will.
 
@nathanstrong "n00b" and "kill" are verboten words in your house? I understand the need to guide language development, but damn. There's probably quite the story that led to those decisions, but I question the wisdom that came behind those choices.

At first glance, it feels like removing knives from the house because they played with them before you made time to set the boundaries on how to use knifes safely. I hope I'm wrong.
 

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