It all came crashing down Tuesday

[henriettevann]

@pensonfam I've always found it easier to talk to strangers and hard to relate to people. If you want to talk at us, we're here. If you want to be consoled, we're here.
I do know that you need to be there for each other because you both probably feel like you can't talk to anyone.

 

[sk1llgrid]

@pensonfam You've probably heard this song, but I listened to it again after many years and the lyrics bring me comfort. "Lean on Me" by Bill Withers.

 

[blessedb]

@pensonfam So sorry to hear this. It is good you named him and are memorializing him. Grieve as you must. Also, keep notes. You will want them later. They may help someone else and give meaning to the current chaos, but later. Now, just breathe and let it out.

 

[hairybikerrev]

@pensonfam I am so so sorry for your loss. You and your partner are wonderful parents who did everything you could for your son. I'm sorry life is so unfair.

I just want to say, that you and your wife may grieve very differently and this can be incredibly difficult to reconcile. That her grief style doesn't minimise yours or vice versa. If one of you can't cry out finds solace in keeping busy, whilst the other never wants to see daylight again and can't get out of bed, they're both perfectly normal reactions. Be gentle with yourself and with each other.

 

[ssh]

@pensonfam So sorry to hear about your loss and sincerely hope you and your wife remain as well as you can through this journey.

We lost our first midway through the pregnancy and I can only imagine how you both may be feeling.

If i can share with you a line i came across a year ago that helped me word how I felt in the hope it may help you, it is that 'Grief is love with no place to go'.

I don't know where we go or what happens when we are no longer here but i sincerely hope it is with/or where our loved ones are. I think about my son every day and speak to him in my head before I fall asleep -- i'd like to hope that he and all the other little ones that never made it in to our arms are with family, and each other.

Please take care -- If you ever need someone to chat about it with, feel free to DM.

 

[khelzy09]

@pensonfam “Sorry” is bull*hit. I’ve lost close loved ones way way too early and I hated hearing people say “sorry.” It’s so commonly used that to use it in such a situation doesn’t honor the gravity and significance of what’s occurred.

What happened to you is unfair. You got screwed, you got knifed in the back by life and you rightfully should be absolutely devestated. There is no rationalizing or diminishing what you’ve gone through and will carry with you for the rest of your life. It’s not fair. It’s not okay. No one deserves this.

The only thing that’s ever helped me, aside from time (lots of it), is moving forward in their honor. Honor your lost one by living a life that was taken from them. Wake up for them. Get outside and live, in their honor knowing that they—your son—would have wanted this. Move forward for him. Honor the life he didn’t get to have by making something of yours.

I love you guys, this brought me to tears.

 

[katrina2017]

@pensonfam I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine the pain and heartbreak your family is feeling right now. If you ever need to vent, help yourself over to r/daddit. It's a wonderfully, supportive group of people -- I'd contest the best on Reddit -- and we'd love to have you.

 

[kaitlynzimer]

@pensonfam If you are religious then this is for you.

Our condolences to you, this is first.

Second, remember that this life is full of hardships and tests since you were born until you die.

If you get something nice, thank God because everything in this life is from him.

If you faced a loss or a hardship also thank God and have patience. Because you never know, we never know what is behind the corner and what is good on the long run.

Be strong and the biggest reward will be there definitely

 

[gaplek]

@pensonfam Never stop trying. You'll look back and the hurt will never go away. Still there for us after losing three. But finally we made it. Our daughter is the joy of our life. The three we lost will never go away. But the happiness of the one that's here today is multitudes larger than the sadness. Keep trying. Never give up. It will come one day.