Michelle Wolf is hosting The Daily Show this week, and she did a really good piece about the medicalization of childbirth. Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GzV0SGzTb8
When she started by saying she'd recently had a home birth, I worried it was about to be a lecture about how I am somehow deficient for having a hospital birth. It wasn't that. Of course it wasn't. Michelle wouldn't do so many of us dirty like that.
As she listed all of the things that happen in hospitals in the name of getting the babies out in the most "efficient" ways, it started to become a mental checklist for me.... Yes, that did happen in my birth; yes, it did lead to that; yes, it did take forever; yes, it did end in a c-section. And this didn't come up in the piece, but yes, I did have complications after.
As I watched and checked these things off in my head, I started to feel so much sadness. I had hoped for a more natural experience, took Lamaze and everything, but I still fell into the same traps as (it seems) 80% of other women. It made me feel sad for me, sad for all of us. Sad for the state of the American health care system.
I gave birth two years ago now. I thought I was over it. My son's birth was a terrible experience, but I thought I had left it behind. "It's okay," I told myself, "It's over now, and I like him so much!" I thought I was breezy enough, and frankly forgetful enough. But it's still there. It's there in the same way my father's death (8 years ago now) is there - whenever I take too many moments to think about it, it is as painful as if it were yesterday. When I think about my childbirth experience, I feel grief. That sucks.
Sorry for the downer post - like the title says, I'm in my feelings today, and I don't really have anyone to talk to* about it.
*I did try to talk to my husband, but he just doesn't get it. Words he said to me: "Yeah, but wasn't your birth kind of textbook? Like don't most women have the same things happen?" I had to walk away, lest I actually punch him in the stomach. I sent him the link and resolved not to bring it up again, because I think he is incapable of saying the right thing.
Edit: Girls, I'm obviously not advocating for home birth, and neither, I think, is Michelle. Of course hospitals are necessary and I personally think that's where births should usually happen, to be prepared for adverse events. But I think it's pretty obvious that something has gone wildly, wildly wrong with how birth is treated in our medical system. Stop getting upset. No one is coming at you for how your birth happened.
When she started by saying she'd recently had a home birth, I worried it was about to be a lecture about how I am somehow deficient for having a hospital birth. It wasn't that. Of course it wasn't. Michelle wouldn't do so many of us dirty like that.
As she listed all of the things that happen in hospitals in the name of getting the babies out in the most "efficient" ways, it started to become a mental checklist for me.... Yes, that did happen in my birth; yes, it did lead to that; yes, it did take forever; yes, it did end in a c-section. And this didn't come up in the piece, but yes, I did have complications after.
As I watched and checked these things off in my head, I started to feel so much sadness. I had hoped for a more natural experience, took Lamaze and everything, but I still fell into the same traps as (it seems) 80% of other women. It made me feel sad for me, sad for all of us. Sad for the state of the American health care system.
I gave birth two years ago now. I thought I was over it. My son's birth was a terrible experience, but I thought I had left it behind. "It's okay," I told myself, "It's over now, and I like him so much!" I thought I was breezy enough, and frankly forgetful enough. But it's still there. It's there in the same way my father's death (8 years ago now) is there - whenever I take too many moments to think about it, it is as painful as if it were yesterday. When I think about my childbirth experience, I feel grief. That sucks.
Sorry for the downer post - like the title says, I'm in my feelings today, and I don't really have anyone to talk to* about it.
*I did try to talk to my husband, but he just doesn't get it. Words he said to me: "Yeah, but wasn't your birth kind of textbook? Like don't most women have the same things happen?" I had to walk away, lest I actually punch him in the stomach. I sent him the link and resolved not to bring it up again, because I think he is incapable of saying the right thing.
Edit: Girls, I'm obviously not advocating for home birth, and neither, I think, is Michelle. Of course hospitals are necessary and I personally think that's where births should usually happen, to be prepared for adverse events. But I think it's pretty obvious that something has gone wildly, wildly wrong with how birth is treated in our medical system. Stop getting upset. No one is coming at you for how your birth happened.
It worked so great, I didn't have Any pain from that point until like, ever? Even with stitches down there. I had bleeding and aching and all the usual symptoms after discharge for a couple weeks but really, that was the least of everything. The blood pressure cuff was literally way more painful that anything else that happened to me (super tight and frequent readings). I told the anesthesiologist that and she was amused. But I was serious!