I thought twins where bad but triplets are worse

hoodlesshunter

New member
I have 5 yo single and 3yr old twins, we welcomed our triplets on the 10th of November and they are now a little over a month old

I was fortunate enough to carry them for as long as I did they didn’t need any major nicu time the middle triplet needed a few extra tests but they where able to come home after a few days

This has unfortunately meant we where straight into the deep end with them

The diapers are just never ending, I remember the new born stage being awful but this just feels like hell sometimes, we have a full time day nanny and we recently hired a part time evening nanny, I’m on maternity leave aswell but there always a baby in need

The middle trip was born deaf there was a fluid build up in her head but they where able to slowly drain it when she was born to relive pressure on her brain (she was still unfortunately deaf though) and they then completely drained it last week, so now she has went from being completely deaf to having great hearing, she used to be so quiet and easy going but now she the same as the other 2 every little thing sets her off

By some miracle I’m able to exclusively breastfeed bar using formula the first week until my supply strengthened, I want to do it but god it’s just frustrating, my boobs feel like their always in demand wether it be from feeding the trips or from pumping, when I nurse over bottle feed there’s always one getting shafted and so I have to just watch them cry for an extra 20 mins until I have a free boob, I try to rotate it so it’s not the same one all the time

Everyone volunteers to help but when they come over to help all they do is hold the babies which is not helping, I’m told how lucky I am to have not needed a c but when I bring up the fact I passed out for 3 hours after I pushed number 3 out I’m just dismissed “yeah but your ok now”

My husband has been great but he’s still working, we take shifts but with 3 babies we end up both being up dosent matter who’s shift it is, my twins are throwing temper tantrums over being ignored, we give them an hour a day every day but they still get mad. When the triplets cry the twins will run over to them not to help calm them down but rather to shove a hand over their mouths and yell shut up at them, I don’t want to let this keep going but I also don’t want to forge any resentment between the twins and triplets

Is my life just going to be utter hell for the next few years?
 
@hoodlesshunter if twin parents need 4 people to give the same parent to child ratio, triplet parents would need 6 adults, but Wow you have both Im thinking you need 8-10 people at once to help. This is crazy. you are doing amazing. how did you find time to post?

write a chore list, be specific. Include a place for them to sign up. Everyone loves holding those babies Im sure!

Bottles or pump parts need washing
laundry
dishes
grocery shopping
meal prep
snacks for mom (dont forget the oreos)

wishing you and your family the best. You are doing amazing.

Dont forget to give yourself some grace 💕✨
 
@hoodlesshunter Omg I've been wondering how you are! I didn't even know vaginal delivery of triplets was possible, you're amazing.

I'm so sorry it's so hard, I cannot imagine. Keep hiring all the help you can!! You deserve any break you can get. Do you want to consider formula sometimes to ease the burden on you? Exclusively breastfeeding triplets sounds like an enormous burden for you.
 
@hoodlesshunter Every body here has twins or more and is amazed

What you described is like a gold medal of parenting so I can't say much: keep up with the good work and try to stay in good health (I mean you the mum)

Remember you can say no to help if it's not helping so much and irritates you more than anything

Have fun!
 
@hoodlesshunter Congrats on the trips arriving in good health!

Sorry, no words of advice but you're in the trenches for another month or so

Good luck, breath deeply and allllllll the caffeine
 
@hoodlesshunter Congratulations mama - you are amazing for carrying and birthing those babies so well. Be easy on yourself - your body would still be healing too and your hormones still balancing out.

I have 11 month old twins and 2 older singletons (5 and 4) so these are just some of my thoughts/ideas;

In regards to streamlining things can you start formula feeding so others can help with feeds? Have a daily list of chores that need to get done (washing, vacuuming, dishes, sweeping, toy tidying etc) and assign a job to every adult who comes into your home. Holding a baby isn’t a job.

I would suggest trying to get into a daily routine and stick with it - that way everyone knows what’s happening and when. It might also help the babies and twins settle a bit?

It’s great you are already spending dedicated time to your twins and singleton, perhaps adding some positive verbal validation? Are they in school or childcare? Can your family take them for a few days to get them out the house?

I think the next 6 months will just be survival mode for everyone in your family until you settle into your new “normal”.

Best of luck and try to focus on the positive- you have 6 beautiful children and a lovely family xx
 
@srrngugi Another plug for formula feeding or at least adding in a formula feed now and then. We exclusively FF our twins, made a full pitcher of formula every day and stuck it in the fridge and then it was ready to go immediately, and anyone can feed a baby (we fed cold).
 
@timothythe2nd Yup it really alleviates a lot of the burden for mum but not everyone is comfortable formula feeding. I only FF my 4 kids and found it great for getting my husband to bond with the babies.
 
@hoodlesshunter Wowwwww maybe your husband can step in and have a conversation with your family that if they come over, they need to help with X chores? I was very blunt with my parents that if they were coming over, it was to help me (cook dinner, get groceries, clean, mow the lawn, whatever) not to sit and hold a baby all day (of course they can hold a baby, but help me first). If you don’t want unsolicited advice then all I have to say is YOU ARE AMAZING because holy fricken hell, that’s a tough hand, mama!
 
@hoodlesshunter Ten months into having twins, I tell everyone who will listen that triplet parents should be in charge of everything. Heads of state, climate change, political unrest, leave it up to the parents of triplets that have navigated the truly impossible. I salute you
 
@hoodlesshunter Following this post because this is going to be my life soon and I am definitely so nervous for it. I have a 3 year old singleton, 19 month old twins, and am 19 weeks with triplets. I’m not planning on breastfeeding (couldn’t supply enough for my twins so I’m not gonna stress about trying for 3) but otherwise same.
 
@hoodlesshunter Wow how were you able to have a vaginal delivery? Are you in the US?

You are going to be in the trenches for a while, but sounds like you have a good support system. Switch to botto feeding it EBF becomes too much for you mental health.
 
@levopoly There was a number of factors that allowed me to have a vaginal delivery

I’m in good health and so where the kids, I had no deficiency’s and no problems with previous births which where all quite fast from when labour started till kid came out

They where my 4th kids so apparently that means my body is more likely to be able to handle it all

The infants positions where perfect for a vaginal delivery

Not in the US though U.K, I had to deliver in the OR in case anything did go wrong so they could quickly intervene

It’s rare to do a vaginal for more than twins but if the sun moon and stars line up it’s possible
 
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