@kthor64 Yeah, once OP tries to plan a birthday party for her kid, she'll understand how challenging it is. If she doesn't actually have any plans, she should go.
@snyder502 Don't feel bad. If you want to spend your first mother's day with your family that's perfectly acceptable. You can always go to the kids the day before the party and help set up our you can go spend a day with them after to make it to.
In reality, 3 and 4 aren't going to remember this birthday very well later in life but you'll always remember your first mother's day.
@snyder502 It happens... That's life... You have your own family now and they want to celebrate that day with you. Let them know your plan and that's that. I used to do the same with my brothers kids until I had one of my own. Now we just coordinate special days so no one misses out on the celebration. Some times it works, others it don't...it be like that.