How did you know you were ready to send you kid to preschool if they didn’t HAVE to go?

[btsfan]

@elinternational My son just missed the cut off for public pre-k by less than a week. We opted to send him part time to private pre-k for this year solely for the social aspect. Before school, he thought any kid who walked past him was his friend, and he cried when they walked away. That was our breaking point. He needed to be around kids his age.

 

[awchristian]

@elinternational My girls will be 4 in the fall and we’re definitely sending them to preschool - for us it has a lot more to do with socialization and getting them used to the idea of school, and how to listen to teachers, and just generally what will be expected of them in kindergarten. It’s not about whether or not they’d know letters/numbers/etc or not

 

[ldingle]

@elinternational I was originally going to start my kid in preschool at 2.5 very part time (two mornings a week, and I would be there one of the two days) at a coop preschool, mainly so she could spend more time with other kids and adults other than myself. Unfortunately Covid hit at that point and we cancelled it, so the next year at 3.5 we started her at 2 half days a week and quickly bumped up to 3 as she was thriving there. This year (4.5-5.5) she is doing 3 days a week 9-3, more than last year. In kindergarten next year she will be doing 9-3 5x a week and I don’t want that to come as a big shock to her. Especially since your kid is shy I would be starting to give him opportunities to practice asap, though probably not 4 days a week.

My kid is way ahead academically as well. The point of preschool for us was practicing social skills and conflict resolution, getting exposed to types of play I may not be doing at home, practice interacting with other adults, and practice being away from me and home. To this end I chose a play-based preschool that does not focus on academics. IMO this is the most age appropriate option as well, and academics are easily handled by me at home.

Kids really start to be able to play with other children around age 3 so I feel like this is the ideal time to start preschool. I want to do two years of preschool prior to kindergarten for both my girls, though only part time.

You mentioned the only good preschool you could find is 4 days a week. I am surprised as most play based preschools near me offer 2 and 3 day a week options, especially for kids aged 3! If that is the only good preschool could you sign up and just only send him 2 or 3 days a week, if you feel that is the right amount?

 

[heatherolivia]

@elinternational So I sent all 4 of mine to some kind of preschool and each situation was slightly different, but I was happy with all of them. If you are planning on full day kindergarten, I highly recommend doing something before. It really helps with the transition. All of mine started in a part day situation around 3 or 4. As you said, it's just getting used to being there. A class full of kids with 2 adults is a lot different than the one on one reality they have been living. Even if they know all the "skills", just the environment is an adjustment. So go for it. It gives you a little adjusting space as well. Half way into the school year, with my youngest finally in full day school, and I'm still feeling at loose ends during the day sometimes.

 

[mosymuis]

@elinternational Keep him at home. He's doing great with a loving mother, and you can always sign him up for extracurriculars to learn something new. He's still so young, they just need a loving mama who will continue to teach and nurture them. Plus he's got a little sibling to play and help you with. The friends can come later! He'll be happier at home with you.

 

[pkenn166]

@elinternational I think most of school before high school is for social and emotional development rather than the academics. It's easy to teach the alphabet at home. It's much harder to teach dealing with teachers and other kids when it's just you and your boy.

 

[patricia1213]

@elinternational My son has been asking me since he was 3 to go to school. His pediatrician also recommended it at 3. I held off because Covid. Now he’s going at 4 after getting vaccinated and he likes it. My main reason was for the social aspects but then I found out from school that he was lacking in some motor skills needed for kindergarten. He doesn’t like to write or draw or color so he’s practicing that at school daily. I don’t allow playdoh or slime in my home but apparently that helps with their fine motor skills.

 

[kuhao1806]

@elinternational I sent mine at 2.5 for several reasons:
-she needed social skills & exposure to same-age peers

-I wanted to acclimate her to different authority figures so things like taking turns & following directions from someone else would come more easily

-overall enhancing school readiness. My child is very smart, but so much of learning at this age is through play and interaction that I couldn't provide to her by myself

-I wanted more of an identity for myself; I love being a mom, but I was kind of losing myself in Momhood and needed to build up other strengths & qualities I have. Luckily, I found a great job helping caregivers of young children learn about parenting & child development (so my work enhances my parenting, and my parenting enhances my work)

 

[lambofgodgirly]

@elinternational I started my daughter in preschool very part time (only 6 days a month) when she turned 3. Next December she'll turn 4 and she'll start full time preschool in the fall, just shy of 4.

It was partially to give me a break, but also to help her socialize and learn how to follow instructions from teachers. I also think the structured environment is really good for her. They do so many crafts, learn songs, make friendships, play on the playground, etc. I could do all of that with her too, but it's really exhausting to plan out everyday like that. And I like that she's doing it all with a group of kids her age.

They honestly don't do a lot of structured "learning" in preschool. I used to be a preschool teacher and besides a craft and maybe a little worksheet, they mostly play and interact with each other. There's lots of songs, structured movement time, rest time, etc. But it's a lot of play. When she turned 3 I felt preschool would be beneficial to her, before that it didn't feel all that necessary. It's still not what I'd consider "necessary", but it is really nice and helpful and can be a lot of fun for them.

 

[mrseedsower]

@elinternational I did pre-k with my oldest at 4, 3 days a week for 4 hours. It was great. He had such a good time! I thought he would be sad to leave me, but he ran inside and didn’t look back every day. I kind of want to send his brother at 3, but we’ll see how things shake out. His brother is more shy and clingy, pandemic child. He won’t even go into story time at the library with me .

 

[frankarmendariz]

@elinternational We enrolled our son in preschool this year primarily for social skill help. He is a really social kid but mostly with adults, not kids his age. It’s cute when he comes home and talks about his classmates. I think he would still choose to play with us or other adult family members but I feel better since before preschool it was just him and me all day long playing. Also in the same boat, I have a baby girl at home so it’s helped having him have a bit of a schedule and it’s only three days a week for 2 1/2 hours so it’s not too hard to plan around it. I’d say do it if you find a school you like.

 

[frozenhockeypuck]

@elinternational We sent our son to preschool five half days when he was 2. There is a super high demand for preschools in our area and we found a spot in a reputable school we liked so we jumped on it. The school is very small (I think 90 students or so) and their waiting list is 150 students.

Personally, I felt like I needed more time to get things done and for myself. My son gets to socialize, learn things, do messy art projects, run around outside and so I feel less pressure to do it all.

Also, my son is shy as well but he has adapted to preschool very well. He only cried a couple days at drop off and the teacher said he never cried at school. I really thought he would have a harder time but he didn’t.

 

[katrina2017]

@elinternational We plan on doing preschool at home and getting socialization with our local homeschool groups, going to the playground, socializing with family members and taking field trips. We plan on homeschooling in general.

 

[msmith33]

@elinternational I knew it was time to send my twins to preschool because they were driving me bananas and I desperately needed a break from them my husband works a lot and we don’t have family nearby so school was my only option for a regular break.

Preschool is about so much more than academics! They get to socialize with other kids their age, learn classroom skills, and get the opportunity to do things they wouldn’t get to do at home. Like messy crafts or going outside no matter the weather I think school vs. lots of extracurriculars gives them more of a chance to connect with other kids and make friends since they’re together longer. My kids go to a play based preschool so there’s not a ton of academic focus anyway, but they learn so much through play!

Mine also have a birthday right after the cutoff so by the time they start kindergarten next year they’ll have had 3 years of preschool. They started shortly after they turned 3. We started with a half day program 3 days a week, then the next year it was 4 half days, and now they’re in 5 full days. You can definitely ease into it.

 

[taznq15]

@elinternational I sent my 2 year old to nursery when I had a baby because I knew there was so much she would get there that would be hard for me to do while caring for the baby. The school is big on outdoor time and it’s important for me that she gets outside once a day, so I love that they check that box for me. It has been a wonderful experience. She has friends that she loves talking about. She is only 2.5 and tells me which one of her little people (fisher price) are her classmates. Like she pretends they are her classmates, it so freaking cute. And the exercise of her going into the world for just a little bit and then returning to me has been really positive. I feel like her home base. She just seems to be having a blast so I couldn’t recommend it enough. The one big caveat is that the program I chose isn’t exactly cheap, so there is that aspect. Obviously it’s wwwaaayyy cheaper than a full day sorta deal, but it is like $10K for the year.

 

[katrina2017]

@elinternational Our second and third kids are just a year apart, and the first had some developmental issues and adhd, and he qualified for a developmental preschool designed to help, so we jumped at the opportunity.

Then covid lockdowns hit mid year and he came home. When they opened up the next year we sent him back for the help, but kept his neurotypical little sister home.

By the next year, I was just ready for a little break (I’d been sahp with three kids for four years at that point. Even just an hour a day break to drink a cup of coffee and run some dishes/laundry without interference sounded good. And because of covid she’d only been socializing with her siblings.

Sending her was the right choice. She loves going, got over the stranger danger, and is making friends and playing with other kids.

And yeah, I get to drink a cup of coffee now.

 

[bbonilla2]

@elinternational I don't think he has to have 2 years of preschool, but definitely something. Maybe start slow the first year.

Based on what you said about being shy and apprehensive, then I definitely encourage some preschool. Extracurriculars are not the same.

I thought my kid would love preschool. At age 3 he was always asking for friends and trying to play with random kids (this was COVID 2020 so we skipped preschool that year). Now he's almost 5 and has been going to preschool for 6 months and he only kind of likes it.

He gets really overwhelmed with all the chaos and noise of being surrounded by kids. It's just us at home and he's happy occupying himself alone in our quiet house. And he struggles to join established groups of kids playing. He's also learning a LOT about setting boundaries with kids who annoy him, how to play (the other kids aren't doing everything he wants to do like his mama will and they're not polite about it lol), negotiating, problem solving without an adult, learning to eat lunch in a reasonable timeframe or else he'll be hungry, etc.

I'm glad he's getting this practice now. You could always join a homeschool or co-op program that encourages parents to be at the school too.

 

[seadog]

@elinternational As someone who had a preschool teacher in their life, please consider sending your kids to preschool so they know how to interact with other kiddos before kindergarten. The social impacts of preschool are huge.

 

[phillychristian]

@elinternational Something else to consider that would give your son the social boost and experience listening to adults who aren't parents, is a dance/tumbling/martial arts class. That way you don't have to worry about him being bored, he gets to make friends and be physically active while learning skills and coordination as he grows.

 

[cbole]

@elinternational I did it when I needed it. She has gone for over a year and still cried at drop off but has SO much fun throughout the day. More fun than she would have at home. The teachers console her at drop off.
I like that she’ll know the “rules for school” like how to stand in line, follow the teacher, make friends, etc.