@littledot It’s far more selfish to have another kid as some kind of vanity project. With every additional child you spread yourself more thinly, which isn’t fair on your existing children.
@littledot You can't be selfish or insensitive towards a child that doesn't exist. I think you're showing how much you care about your existing child by considering how a situation that could occur with a sibling would affect them. I've also been called selfish, but I don't care. My husband and I love our family of 3. We get to have time to ourselves still while our daughter gets so much attention. She's not quite old enough for true hobbies yet, but she does gymnastics and we take her to a lot of events within the community that would be difficult wlif we were balancing a second as well. As for the anxiety around conceiving and birth, that's your business and your business only.
@littledot Your friend should wash her mouth. Having sibling doesnt mean you are gonna have a good relationship with them (tbh most people i know that have siblings have awful relationship). Also - your only will have friends in the future, maybe cousins, aunts… its not like you only have “3 person family”
@littledot Your spouse is the only person who deserves a justification for whether or not you want a second child. Your friend does not get a vote, and neither does anybody else. There is no "wrong" reason to be OAD, so long as it is the right reason for your family.
