Are we the only ones struggling financially?

sunflower232

New member
I think the answer is no, but I’m just looking for some solidarity from others. Husband and I both have decent incomes. We live in a HCOL area, and have 2 kids in daycare. Even with two daycares, it’s still worth it to keep working. We only have one car to cut down on costs, we bought a house last year but our mortgage + escrow payment is slightly less than we paid in rent anyway, we don’t frivolously spend. and we are STRUGGLING. We can’t save because something keeps happening. Finally just got our credit cards back down to $0 balances and then bam have to replace our main water line. We know our furnace is a ticking time bomb and will be another several thousand dollar expense. The dog and cat have their annual exams in a couple week and that always ends up being close to a $1000. We are so so so very fortunate to not be struggling with debt but I hate that no matter what we do we can’t catch a break. And I feel like we’re doing something wrong or are bad with money or something? Please tell me we’re not alone.
 
@sunflower232 🙋🏼‍♀️same! And we just got notice our daycare costs are going up $150/mo. I have gone through our expenses and we’re not bad at all - we do one date night a month and eat at home for EVERY meal…but damn groceries are expensive too.
 
@cristofar I second this. Asian grocery stores have cheaper produce and better quality meat than your normal Ralph’s, krogers, or Albertsons. If you tend to purchase processed foods like chips, syrups, cereal etc, they’ll be more expensive at the Asian grocery stores
 
@katrina2017 We budget for 370 a week as a family of 5. Sometimes we are over or under but damn when you say “we spend 1400 a month on groceries” it sounds insane.
 
@sunflower232 We are absolutely struggling, basically paycheck to paycheck with two full-time jobs and two part-time jobs (each of us have one of each) in a HCOL area. The cost of daycare is i sane, we are underpaid, and we do not own a home. We can make it break even but it’s a constant struggle and not being able to save or even dream of buying a house is such a grind. Thank you for making this post, we feel really alone sometimes. So many parents we meet own houses, take expensive vacations, etc.
 
@adamasw597 We had to add $200 to our mortgage payment for some reason for the past 12 months (I 100% don’t understand why but my husband does so I trust him lol, something to do with escrow maybe?) and that extra payment is ending in august and I was excited to get that $200/month back in the pot when I realized we’d have to start payment my husbands loans again anyway. It was a nice thought while it lasted 🫠
 
@jim48 Escrow is correct. When you buy a house you have your monthly loan payment for the house, and then an escrow account for your house insurance and property taxes. Most people opt to have escrow rolled into the payment, while a few say no and save it on their own. Depending upon your property taxes that can be a tough bill to pay all at once.

Long story short is yes, each year your property taxes/home insurance is evaluated and you can often have an escrow shortage. Your mortgage company will send a letter saying "You had an escrow shortage, you can pay the difference or you can have it tacked onto your monthly payment." There are a few cases where you can have an overage and they'll pay you back. In this market though, your home values are gonna keep rising, meaning higher property taxes, meaning more escrow shortages. Overall, if you buy a house and the monthly payment is $1500, you aren't likely to keep that payment the same for forever. It will go up due to escrow changes. This is why I will always tell people do not buy at your max. Your payment will go up over time.
 
@jim48 We had our payment go up but also received an escrow refund for more than the total icrease for next year. I get its probably a legal requirement but, Keep it please so I can keep the same payment 😅
 
@sunflower232 Ah yep I think that’s what happened to us too! I told my husband I thought the whole point of a mortgage was so you didn’t have any unexpected increases lol I was wrong!
 
@jim48 You probably pay your real estate taxes and homeowners insurance out of your escrow account. Those costs go up over time which is likely why your escrow account balance needed to be increased. If it’s not clear, I would highly suggest calling your bank so you understand what’s going on.
 
@prodigalsun My husband contacted our bank last year and everything is squared away. I don’t pretend to understand our mortgage and trust my husband to handle it (admittedly he was surprised at first also, but contacted a few people and got it figured out). Thanks for checking though
 
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