Anyone on here who’s partner isn’t an abusive a-hole?

[marielk]

@vigilantrogue My husband has been a FANTASTIC dad so far. After our daughter was born, I didn't change a single diaper during our hospital stay. He jumped up every time and he insisted that I rest and recover from giving birth.

He also made my mental health a priority. He read about PPD and encourages me to get out of the house (alone) for some me time. Which is usually just getting an overpriced coffee and browsing at TJ Maxx by myself, lol.

He doesn't read into every baby topic and milestone like I do but he's always interested when I talk about that stuff. He's an attentive dad and we communicate our needs often!

Tell your partner every feeling so they get an idea of everything you will be going through, being a new mom. And remember that being a dad for the first time is tough for them, too.

 

[redlabour]

@vigilantrogue My husband isn’t abusive. He’s the most honest and loyal person I’ve ever met, actually.

 

[bcraig_6973]

@vigilantrogue My husband has been amazing . When I had my miscarriages he took care of me and cleaning up my tissues. He cleaned the entire pregnancy. When I had c section he took full care of Baby till leave was over. The first 24 hr he almost died to exhaustion helping me and baby. I had to learn how to take care of her from him when my c section got better.

Now after work he cleans dose full chores since baby is 4 months and glued to me atm. He also dose laundry and on weekend take care of her abit so I can get some break.

I didn’t want to marry my exs j lived with them. But my husband I always knew he was going to be a great life partner to share parenthood with and he didn’t disappoint

 

[rickyrixon84]

@vigilantrogue Adding in another amazing husband vote. He regularly lets me know my job is much harder than his and doesn't think he could do it. We also agree that my 'job' is childcare, not cleaning and cooking and keeping house. That's still a joint responsibility outside our work hours. We try to make sure we both get time to ourselves, but he's especially good at letting my time run over or giving me breaks outside of those prearranged times if I'm struggling. My daughter was 6m when Covid started so he's been working from home most of her life and its been a dream. Obviously I don't interrupt for small stuff, but when there was a nappy explosion and I needed an extra set of hands he was always there!

As for finances, we combined them well before having a kid. We see ourselves as one big family unit that we all work to support. He brings in the money, but I manage it. We both work towards our goals and contribute resources in whatever way we can. If I get a chance for some freelance hours I bring in extra, but it's not expected. Money is just a resource to us the same as time or energy, so it doesn't matter who brings it in. I know this isn't a common mindset, but it really baffles me that other people don't see it this way. Obviously I'm talking in healthy relationships, because unhealthy ones clearly have some warped thinking causing the problems...

I hope you have a lovely sahp experience, but as I've seen many others say; your support network is key to getting through this. First kid is an insane adjustment even to a great relationship. We were thrown for a loop and it took forever to get on an even keel again. Although I don't have a physical support system because we live far from family, being able to call my people and get help/support was life saving in that first year.

 

[psalmsofdavid]

@vigilantrogue My husband is the reason I love being a stay at home mom. He always takes the kids of a day on his day off and gives me a day to sleep/ read/ run (I often end up joining them in whatever fun thing they’re doing but that’s because I want to, not because I have to). He still helps with daily tasks like laundry and dishes whenever he sees it. He supports me training for ultramarathons because he knows I need something outside of my family. And on his days off we actually have time to spend together instead of just rushing to get groceries, meal prep, do chores, keep our head above water. We share sleeping in and time to ourselves and mutually respect each other. After two years at home, we have never been happier b

 

[tomydoor]

@vigilantrogue Our baby is 5 months old and my husband works a demanding tech job (he works from home but is glued to his computer) he gets out of work and starts his "shift" with the baby immediately he also does all of the wakeups and re-giving her the binky when she stirs too much in the crib at night. He only asks for help when she's too much(like he needs sleep too lol) he gives me as much me time as I need when he isn't working and makes sure we get snuggle time when we get to bedtime. He's also reassuring that I'm doing a good job I always feel like I'm failing and he's always really reassuring!
He was also amazing in the hospital! He got me snacks and Gatorade when I was in labor and fed me and brought me water while I was b-feeding our babes

 

[riceak]

@vigilantrogue I am another case of “husband got even better” after our baby came. He adores our daughter and dotes on her any chance he gets. As a couple, we still laugh and are silly often, go on dates regularly and have a healthy sex life. Every household has hardships but with open communication and mutual understanding, life can be smooth sailing overall.

I think that the people who aren’t as happy in their relationships tend to be more vocal about it to vent and find solace in others who have similar feelings.

 

[noahchild]

@vigilantrogue My husband and I have times of frustration, but he's not abusive. Been married 8 years, my oldest is 5 years old.

 

[bornagainchristian84]

@vigilantrogue The other day I was indulging in a finance book-learning more about investing.

After work, honey picked up our daughter from school she doesn’t drive yet. Then ran my errands. Came home did the dishes. Cleaned the kitchen. I glued my butt to this couch reading lol
Honey does this a lot so it isn’t a one time thing. I am grateful for him.