10 Year Old Can't Read or Count

[thumperofbibles]

@ichabod Regarding her urination, has she been tested for diabetes? That’s almost always a first sign of it.
Others have answered with the rest of what I was going to digest.

 

[katrina2017]

@thumperofbibles This! I was looking to see if someone mentioned T1D. Very common to have incontinence with diabetes. Please have her checked by a regular doctor. I know she needs to see s a lot of professionals, but unchecked diabetes kills.

 

[harrisd83]

@ichabod How is this child 10 yrs old and the school system hasn’t spoken to her mother???? How has she passed from 1 grade to the next when she can’t read or count?? How can a school system be so lax? Someone needs to speak up for this child.

 

[stanleyd]

@ichabod There is DEFINITELY a learning disorder.
I have studied the DSM V manual, like it's the back of my hand, and EVERYTHING you have written, is SCREAMING RED FLAGS.

I understand you Love V and her mom, BUT SOMEONE HAAAAAS TO STEP IN.

The mom is trying to keep this innocent, let's just keep working on this, BUT SHE IS WAITING TOO LONG!
V HAS MISSED MANY LEARNING MILESTONES!

You are in a tough situation, BUT bc you have this relationship with the both of them, the likelihood of V's mom being WILLING TO ACTUALLY LISTEN TO SOMEONE, IS VERY VERY GOOD.

As an educator, I really feel like you NEED to put THAT metaphorical "hat" on, and give her mom the TRUTH.
You're the very BEST person to do it, BECAUSE she trusts you.

Please don't let V suffer any longer.

You and I BOTH KNOW, that MOST kids, that are coming out of Kindergarten, now have to be able to realize and know how to utilize,.....at LEAST 50 sight words, BEFORE they can graduate to the next yr.

V IS FAR BEHIND THIS POINT, AND SHE IS 10!!!!
PLEASE BE the voice that V needs, bc she CANT do this for herself!!!

As a kid, I had high functioning ADHD, BUT there was NO name for that disorder then.

My mom was CONVINCED that she or one of her illustrious boyfriends, could just "beat it out of me."
So I learned to be silent, and suffered alone for so very very long.
I suffered TERRIBLY bc the "high functioning" version, allowed me the ability to mask it.
I'm extremely intelligent, so grades weren't ever my problem.

I TRULY BELIEVED THERE WAS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME AS A CHILD.
I literally broke down in art class once, in the 4th grade, bc I couldn't draw in a 3d version, to make my art look as real as the object on the table.
I remember yelling at myself in my own head, telling myself to stop being so stupid, or I was going to be considered a "problem."

"V" CANNOT DO THIS INNER OBJECTIVE REASONING, BC SHE DOESNT EVEN HAVE THE SKILLS TO DO THAT YET!
PLEASE DO WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW, NEEDS TO BE DONE....OTHERWISE, V WILL BE THE ONE WHO CONTINUES TO SUFFER.

I'm willing to bet...whenever she came down the stairs with the toys in the bag and told yall about the clothes being in her toy box, she was probably actually really proud of herself for accomplishing "exactly what yall said."
You KNOW that THAT was the straw, that should be like, "OK, I need to break this news."

If there's anyone who can do it, and I think be able to do it without hurting either of the ppl you care so much for, it truly IS YOU.

PLEASE GO HELP V.
IT'S VERY LONELY, NOT HAVING PPL UNDERSTAND YOU AS A CHILD.

 

[ichabod]

@stanleyd I really really appreciate this perspective.

 

[jennifer1977]

@ichabod I wonder if V's mom is trying to avoid a diagnosis because she may be hiding something. Some of V's problems are similar to my nephew's learning disabilities due to being exposed to drugs and alcohol as a fetus.

 

[stanleyd]

@ichabod I'm so glad, I really wanted to help, bc I feel like WE NEED to be the voice for V, bc she obviously can't understand everything that's happening to her.

 

[jayy18]

@ichabod The first that came to my mind is auditory processing disorder.

The baby talk and daytime peeing…might be cognitive delay of some type. I also wonder if there is any chance she is being or has been sexually abused?

Edit to add:

…she isn’t a doofus…

You haven’t said that mom is alarmed by the behaviors or lack of academic skills. Frustrated by the baby talk, but not alarmed. This sounds like mom is not aware of what a fifth grader should be able to do? If she is aware, has she sought intervention of some sort? If not, then it seems like there is a parenting concern, after all.

 

[alwaysbethinkin]

@ichabod An assistant principal that is asking Reddit for advice on a child’s delayed learning?
Perhaps you should consider a new profession.

 

[ichabod]

@alwaysbethinkin I know what I'd do professionally. I was asking about how to support her mother as a partner.

 

[alwaysbethinkin]

@ichabod You would also have to talk to parents about their children in your “profession”.
I’m not convinced you’re a principal.
If you can’t talk to your “girlfriend” (probably not the best idea to sleep with the mother of your student) your relationship is doomed from the start.
This whole scenario is weird.

 

[antioch88]

@alwaysbethinkin I'm not convinced that this person is any sort of educator either. It's probably some kid worried about a sibling or another kid in their class.

 

[ichabod]

@alwaysbethinkin Thank you for your time.

 

[shadowoflight]

@ichabod Your ethical duty is elsewhere than supporting the parent.

 

[everettbarron]

@ichabod This child
Has an obvious intellectual disability

 

[zois]

@ichabod Sounds like some cognitive delay. My seven year old with ASD, cognitive delay, and apraxia knows his ABC, can count to 100, and knows some sight words. He’s been in lots of therapies and special tutoring to help him get here. V can get there too with the right help. But it all starts with a proper diagnosis. We did the school first and then three independent facilities that specialized in children with disabilities. Once we got the medical diagnosis and codes and got him in all the therapies (starting at age 3) that’s when he really started to turn around. Oh also get ready for a battle with your insurance company. All the best practitioners are out of network in our area.

 

[chinita1416]

@ichabod My almost 2yo has been able to consistently count to 10 since 18mo. He's also able to say and recognize the entire alphabet. I know he's advanced...but this 10yo should have had an assessment done a very very long time ago. I'm really shocked that this isn't considered some form of neglect. Poor kid is suffering and clearly has some real medical problems. Especially the wetting herself thing and always peeing? That sounds like a physical problem. How has she passed her grade levels? My 1st grader repeated her grade simply because she's slightly ADHD and one of the younger kids in her class....and this was strongly urged by her teachers AND principal.

I say this with peace and love...I feel like you may have been underreacting to this a little bit. Especially as an educator...if mom isn't open to an assessment for her daughter I'd strongly reconsider the relationship and even think about making a CPS report for neglect.

 

[chriscomplex]

@chinita1416 To be fair, what your toddler is doing is rote counting (reciting 1 2 3) and not actual counting with one-to-one correspondence, which is a skill that develops in preschool.If you put 7 blocks in front of your toddler, he will likely not be able to count them reliably without your help, especially if they aren’t in a line. He may miss counting one or count one twice. Whereas the activities that OP was talking about are to develop one-to-one correspondence counting.

 

[chinita1416]

@chriscomplex Actually he does count. Specifically, he counts his cars the most often. He's autistic and we've been through developmental screenings numerous times.

 

[onthemoveto]

@chriscomplex As someone who has worked with a bunch of toddlers, they can definitely count at 18 months if they’re advanced. Not in a line, not rote.