Wife’s water broke at 31 w / 4 d - scared and alone

anon9000get

New member
My wife’s water broke Christmas Eve morning, she is currently 31 weeks and 4 days old. She’s been admitted into the hospital and given steroids to help develop our baby’s lungs and antibiotics via IV and orally. The plan is bed rest at the hospital and hope and pray that we can keep the baby inside my wife for as long as possible, target 34 weeks.

We’re both extremely scared and afraid though my wife is really strong. I’m scared for her risk of infection along with her having to endure (hopefully) weeks in a hospital. Additionally we’ve both read and heard how premature babies in the 32 or 34 week period are at high risk for long term emotional and intellectual impairments not to mention the physical challenges of coming into this world without fully developing senses; I’m hurting so much thinking of seeing our baby in the NICU with feeding and breathing tubes.

Does anybody have experience with this and can offer some reassurance? Anybody raise a premature child and can quell our development concerns? How can I help keep my wife strong and support her during her stay in the hospital?

I really just feel like my world is crumbling around me and don’t know what to do.
 
@anon9000get Try and stay strong for your partner going through this.

I was born at 26 weeks and I survived and am just fine. All I've got is asthma and ADHD.

It can be stressful but modern medicine is absolutely amazing and your partner and baby have amazing odds in their favour.

Deep breaths and see if there is anything else to be done before baby gets here to help keep you busy.
 
@juraganloak Thank you so much! We’ve heard how babies around this gestational age are likely to develop emotional challenges in addition to being more challenging when they come home from the NICU due to their higher anxiety and stress. Have you experienced that in your patients?
 
@anon9000get Early preterm I would worry about this... You guys are so close to full term (37 weeks) that I would not worry about long term issues at all!!! Lots of babies are born even earlier than yours and they are absolutely fine. :) Seriously, do not worry!!!
 
@anon9000get My niece was born at 32 weeks, while she does have asthma and some allergies, she is very social, and super smart too! Not to mention very active as well.

Things will be okay ☺️
 
@anon9000get I have a 3 year old who was born @ 29 +4 weeks. We spent 51 long days in the NICU but my son has had zero issues resulting from his premature birth so far. In fact, most people couldn't believe he was born prematurely because of how quickly he caught up.

I won't sugar coat it. Having a baby with an extended NICU stay has been hands down the hardest thing I've ever endured. BUT, looking back, it was such a short time in his life.

If you have any questions feel free to ask! 32 weeks gives your baby a very high chance of survival. Good luck and keep us updated!
 
@anon9000get I'm a Registered Early Childhood Educator and a Child Development Practitioner and the vast majority of preemies catch up to their peers by kindergarten! It's super scary but the odds are in your favor, just keep mom calm and let the doctors take care of her and baby. Good luck!
 
@anon9000get I will echo some of the other comments in here. Worst case scenario, if the baby comes now the outcome is likely going to be fine at this stage! It will be tough in the beginning, but long-term a baby born at this point is usually just fine. I know it’s hard right now with all of the emotions and fear, but try to be strong for your wife and the baby! You can do it!
 
@anon9000get I’m so sorry this is happening to you guys. I know r/NICUparents is an active community, so you might want to cross post there. I’m sure you could get some good input from the parents over there.
 
@anon9000get My friend’s water broke at about 31 weeks as well! Her fluid levels were through the roof. She was sent home after a few days in the hospital and put on bed rest. She actually ended up needing to be induced last week at 38 weeks since her baby was fully developed by then and on bed rest for 2 months at that point.

Good luck to you!!
 
@anon9000get I believe they had her on a magnesium drip for about 72 hours then she went home! She had a false alarm again around 34 weeks and had to go back in for more magnesium (I could be wrong but I’m about 90% sure it was magnesium) for about 24 hours. Then no sign of labor again until she was induced at 38 weeks!
 
@anon9000get I was born at 28 weeks nearly 32 years ago. Mild childhood asthma that I grew out of, but no other issue, no mental delay or chronic conditions - I have a masters degree. Don't worry about it! Outcomes are great these days and preterm babies do well often! Maybe that helps you, maybe not, but I'm sure everyone will be fine!
 
@anon9000get My friend/coworker had her third baby at 26 weeks. Her little girl is doing totally fine, developing normally, off oxygen for a few months now, and about to celebrate her first birthday! AND she is even more chill than her older siblings.
One of the little girls in my toddler class when I worked at a daycare center was born at around 30 weeks and she fit in perfectly with where she should be developmentally and emotionally.

Of all the people I've known with preemies or the children I've taken care of (also an RN), emotional problems or "harder" babies did not seem to be tied to their gestational age at time of delivery. When I did my rotation at the NICU as a nursing student, the only baby that I would qualify as more challenging was the baby who had been born from a drug addicted mother. The baby was going through withdrawals. He had an adoptive family waiting for him though, so happy ending, but otherwise all the babies were as relaxed and happy as any newborn!

Wishing you guys the best of luck 💜
 
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