What do you tell your pediatrician about sleep?

[yoshinat0r]

Specifically for moms in the US! I usually have to fill out paperwork that asks how many wakes during the night the baby has. Last time at his 3 month appointment I wrote down 3-4 wakes and the nurse asked about it, seemed taken aback. I said just for feeds and then he’s right back down. They don’t know we bedshare and I don’t really plan on sharing that info. I’d assume babies that aren’t bedsharing are also sleeping more through the night than 3-4 wakes, hence her reaction. So do I just start lying on the papers? My baby is pretty dependent on the nipple to get him back to sleep, which I think is normal for bedsharing…right? So still lots of wakes! It’s more like 4-6 wakes/fast fall back asleep, maybe 1-2 of those are actual feeds.

 

[wren84]

@yoshinat0r I tell them they’re in a crib. I have four kids. I don’t tell them I cosleep, cause I don’t want to hear their crappy opinion about it.

 

[christ4ever777]

@yoshinat0r The truth. I don’t need their approval to do what works best for our family. They work for me. Not the other way around.

I’m not being sassy towards you. I just hate that this is even an issue in the US.

 

[justthisone]

@yoshinat0r I came clean to my pediatrician and she was cool and had a harm reduction conversation with me rather than judging and being strict. It was really respectful.

 

[mystisch]

@justthisone Happy cake day!

 

[macbarb]

@yoshinat0r Mine asks if the crib is free of blanket and pillows… yes and also free of the baby

 

[christ4ever777]

@macbarb

 

[aimee17]

@yoshinat0r I was honest the first time, but now I lie. She told me to leave my one week old to CIO when I told her we cosleep. During her 2 month appointment, my baby was tired and I was rocking her so she could calm down. Her pediatrician said, “I see she’s used to you comforting her, wow.” Like, no shit. I’m her mom and she needs me. These people are ridiculous

 

[yoshinat0r]

@aimee17 Yikes. I’d be like byeeeeee

 

[xor2]

@aimee17 How dare you comfort your child!

 

[christ4ever777]

@aimee17 Yikes on fucking bikes

 

[lcnolen2022]

@yoshinat0r I’m honest with them I don’t mind taking the flak, and I feel like i can hold my own if they get confrontational (which has never happened.) I’m hoping by openly talking about it, i can make it more mainstream and less of a crazy crunchy mom thing lol. They usually ask something like “How’s sleep going?” and i respond with a smile and positive tone of voice, “We are doing great! Baby is taking __ naps per day and usually sleeps __ hours overnight with several wakeups to nurse. We bedshare using the Safe Sleep Seven, so it’s super easy to nurse her in the side lying position and then settle right back down to sleep “. Our ped practice is known for being somewhat friendly to crunchy lifestyles though… one is dual certified as an IBCLC, they don’t recommend solids until 6 months, don’t recommend the SNOO or early sleep training, etc. so YMMV.

 

[lucas3478]

@lcnolen2022 It's crazy to think that bedsharing is considered crunchy when it's the norm across the world in many cultures.

 

[katrina2017]

@lcnolen2022 What is YMMV?

 

[llamapacker]

@katrina2017 Your Milage May Vary

 

[christ4ever777]

@llamapacker Ooooh I love this

 

[oceanbreeze4evr]

@yoshinat0r I would think babies who aren’t bed sharing wake more? That’s exactly why I do bed share—so I can get my sleep!

 

[talita]

@oceanbreeze4evr Yeah my baby sleeps through. She wouldn't if we didn't bedshare

 

[wolfbird]

@oceanbreeze4evr Yeah that’s been my experience. I’m still in heavy painkillers and can’t bedshare with my 2-week old and he’s waking 8 to 15 times a night to cuddle or nurse when my others were 2-4 times while cosleeping at that age.

 

[shalomhandiworkgifts]

@yoshinat0r I would be honest with them.

If you get any push-back from your pediatrician and still want to stay in the practice, you could mention Dr McKenna’s groundbreaking work at Notre Dame.

I’m a biological anthropologist and he is extremely well respected in his field. However, a lot of MDs simply don’t keep up with the research.

Here is a decent link to ND Mother and Baby behavioral sleep laboratory

cosleeping lab

And here is another link from them on “breastsleeping”

Breastsleeping