Supporting big families

meraki

New member
Hello folks! I’m a dad of 5 kids (7,6,5,3,2… for now) looking to get my vasectomy reversed to have 2 more.

I’m curious as to what some of y’all do for work without diving in too deep in your personal lives.
 
@meraki If we aren't getting hand me downs from relatives, we thrift. I bareky have to buy clothes and most of our baby stuff was hand me downs or gifts.

My husband works in HVAC and I'm a nurse becoming a billing specialist. We live in an area where the cost of living is low (Although remote workers moving hrte msy drive the cost of living up)

Anyway 4 kids (10, 8, 3, 1) with very tightknit extended families. Grandparents are always willing to babysit. Husbands parents and Chikdfree aunt have a time share in Orlando they are always letting us use.

We have a service that delivers local meat and produce. Inlaws raise chickens and always give us eggs. Also produce.

With lots of aunts and uncles there are lots of gifts (unfortunantly lol)
 
@meraki I’m a physician and husband is a teacher. I always say my kids are my extravagant choice, everything else we are pretty frugal but having five kids was a spendthrifts decision (ha).
 
@meraki I’m an IT manager (20,17,14,14,12,4, and 3 months) and have been a hybrid remote worker for about 15 years, fully remote for the last 5.

I also run a small hobby farm with my partner and kids. It s currently a net money loser but we’re learning so much and the experience is invaluable for the kids. We’re hoping to find our niche so that we can rely on it for income when it’s time for me to retire from IT.

I also work part-time at two different jobs (less than 20 hours a week). For one I lead a youth group for LGBTQ+ kids and for the other I am instructor (of sorts) in a French Culinary School.

I guess I also have another side-gig running website hosting and IT consulting for non-profits as well as helping my partner manage our AirBnb.
 
@prays2 Not a lot, but I’ve always been a go-go-go kind of person and it works. The best part of all of it is that I am able to spend a lot of time with the kids, I don’t really have any of the traditional “dad hobbies” so when I’m not working I’m spending time enjoying life with my kiddos :)
 
@lostgirllikereallylost I thought it was when people aren’t legally married but are completely emotionally committed to each other long-term. Doesn’t seem like a downgrade to me. “Boyfriend” doesn’t convey the seriousness to me.
 
@lostgirllikereallylost I don’t think so. I view it as short for life partner, which seems more all encompassing than “husband” or “wife”. I love it when my husband calls me his partner. We are on the same side and tag team through life and parenting. The term seems to honor that.

I think “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” is a downgrade for sure though.
 
@meraki It’s mostly because we’re learning and making mistakes and not going at it full-time yet. For instance, we have dairy goats and we make a killing selling goat milk and cheese but we really need a dozen more to make it a real money maker so we’re putting all the money back into better equipment and other infrastructure to make it easier to operate legally and at scale. Not talking about “factory farming” but to be able to sell it legally for human consumption we need some commercial equipment we just can’t afford yet. Just stuff like that, trying to take small bites at a time over the course of years - small bites mean small losses from big mistakes and that’s a lot easier to manages than big losses from big mistakes. And pig feed is another example, we spend too much per head feeding them because we don’t have a good way to store the kind of quantity we need to order to get the price down and even if we did we don’t have enough animals to eat it fast enough that we don’t have to risk spoilage of a huge quantity. Someday :)
 
@research49 Slow deliberate progress. If yall have any pointers for early starters, we are all ears. We would like to start a homestead of some sort whenever we are in the position to buy land and put down some roots. We move too often right now to really buy anything so we are in the learn everything we can mindset right now.
 
@meraki We are expecting kids 6&7 in March. Financially, I stay home and do lots of saving money-we homeschool our kids and live on a farm so we grow lots of food, have chickens, etc but also our utilities are minimal. I also mend lots of play clothes, cook almost everything from scratch, buy all of our food in bulk, etc. We have always had minimal expenses-bought vehicles with cash and made investments toward things that reduce future expenses. For example, last year we paid for a woodstove and haven't needed to use our furnace yet this year, which has been amazing especially with energy prices. So we are really fortunate to have a good base of security as far as that goes.

My husband farms full time. Sometimes money is tight but through his financial guidance and the fact that we will never go hungry with what we can grow/harvest around here, we've been able to just tighten our belts and make do. I would also be remiss if I didn't give credit to his family for helping us get established when we were first starting out, but we've been able to steward those things toward more financial independence.

We have a smallish house-three kids bedrooms, no huge living spaces, etc. We do drive a very nice 12 passenger van that we were able to purchase with cash when we sold our other house and moved. But we don't go on huge vacations, we don't buy expensive fun things (unless they are for the farm), and we try to make every decision with long term financial stability in mind. This is easy for us as this suits both of our personalities, but it may be more difficult for some people.
 
@bible2 This sounds like my dream really. We are trying to line ourselves up as best we can to live similarly. We homeschool our kids currently with an outdoor education lead program and it’s been great. We don’t have a farm or land of our own yet, but next time we move that’s what we are aspiring for.
 
@meraki Pregnant with my third with plans for at least one more and I am a SAHM/occasional RN and and my husband is a senior software engineer.
 

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