Sex after birth

[shannonthetigermom11]

@deamy I had no desire to have sex while I was breastfeeding! I tried maybe 3 times in 10 months - I had no desire at all. I also had pain and seeing pelvic floor PT really helped with that. Basically I was holding tension in those muscles and once I got that worked out it was pain free

 

[richardn]

@deamy Has a verry similar issue. What worked for me was LOTS OF LUBE , LOTS OF COCKTAILS and LOTS OF FOREPLAY. I do masturbate on a regular basis, that keeps my libido up, and keeps me into sex if that makes any sense . Since I keep having orgasms , I keep wanting more …

 

[requiringguidance]

@deamy I had 3rd degree tears, I healed faster than expected but I do have some granulation tissue issues. I’ve been intimate I’m 3 months pp too . Certain positions hurt & it’s really hard to get it in ..sorry if that tmi. Idk it just feels like my whole hoonie is smaller not sure if it cause I got stitched up but I’m hoping it will not hurt after a while. But if you got stitches too that may be why it hurts . Just stay on top that’s the only way I can make it work

 

[gfmitch72]

@deamy It's all personal really. After my first, I had sex right at 6 weeks, but not frequently. Maybe once a week, or every other week?

My second, my ex husband and I were all but broken up, so it was very infrequent already. Maybe a couple months? I masterbated way more than I had sex.

I just had my third 3.5 weeks ago and I'm counting down the days until 6 weeks lol my partner and I both have incredibly high sex drives, so we were having sex 3-4 times a week, with the last time being literally the night before I went into labour.

Start slow, use lots of lube

 

[ashira]

@deamy Totally normal. I’ve had 4 kids and my libido was basically a zero until after I weaned. And I try and breastfeed for a year so it’s a long year of no sex drove but it is what it is and it’s your body working at its best!

 

[nattyz]

@deamy we tried at exactly six weeks with a LOT of lube & a lot of mental-relaxing on my part. it wasn’t great at first, but it quickly got better after a few tries. i actually couldn’t orgasm the first 3ish months PP, but that went back to normal, too. it just takes time.

 

[unideus]

@deamy Once I stopped pumping, I felt like my body was more mine. Some people go right back o feeling normal. I had low to none post partum feels, but didn’t start REALLY feeling like myself again until a month ago. And my baby was born in September lol. What a beautiful and strange process it all is!

 

[havesexs]

@deamy I’m told it’s normal—my hormones are so out of whack, I feel negative sex drive. I’ve had a couple good days since PFPT helped me not fear pain (the first few times we tried SUCKED) but I still have 0 desire. Some of it is being touched out and some of it is exhaustion and some of it is just hormones (or lack thereof).

 

[4defaith2017]

@deamy I breastfed until 10 months pp and I had zero sex drive until I weaned. I also felt really stressed about it but looking back I can see now that it’s quite normal. Even at 8 months when we tried for the first time it wasn’t very comfortable because of dryness. We didn’t get back in a groove until after the year mark, and we’ve been good now. I did start exercising again after 1 year and it’s helped my pelvic floor as well.

 

[christopherv]

@deamy As others have said, also breastfeeding and 10 months pp. I started having a bit of libido around 5/6 months but everything was still dry. If your libido comes back but things hurt, I’d suggest sticking to foreplay if you are both comfortable with that but making time for that as well. It helped us feel more connected again rather than simply parenting together yet without all the pain. Planning on weaning at 12 months so hoping that helps…my plan is if it still hurts then I’m following up with the dr. (Also FWIW no period, I’m thinking period/estrogen levels/dryness are all connected?)

 

[deamy]

@christopherv It could be all connected.

TBH I am not looking forward having my period back

 

[francoisakafran]

@deamy Are you nursing? Sex was impossible for me until I started to nurse less, even though I was cleared by a pelvic floor PT. They can’t see what’s going on (or not going on) with your hormones.

Sex got okay around 9-10 months, with a lot of lube. My sex drive didn’t fully return until I got my period back at 13 months pp. We didn’t have much while pregnant since I had placenta previa and by the the time I was cleared I was too uncomfortable. My husband was very understanding. He knew that nursing for a year was important to me. I’m pregnant again now so we’ll see how this goes.

 

[slandley]

@deamy We had sex before 6 weeks. I know, blasphemy.