Plus size pregnancy

[thundergirl96]

Hello everyone. I’m currently 5w3d pregnant, I’m definitely plus size weighing around 260lbs. this is my first pregnancy and I’m absolutely terrified off of reading horror stories about how much obese women get treat differently, I have been trying to live a healthier lifestyle and diet more since finding out, I’m just terrified of my first initial meeting with the midwife. I’m also very self conscious so someone telling me I’m obese (even though I already know it) is very disheartening, PLEASE if there are any positive stories out there about plus size pregnancies it would put my mind at rest ! X

 

[msyue92]

@thundergirl96 I have had really good doctors who were very kind about my weight. They did let me know that I had a higher risk of complications like Gestational Diabetes and would need extra monitoring. My first pregnancy I was about 260 pre-pregnancy and this one I was about 320.

The only negative thing has been that my local hospital won't deliver babies if the mothers BMI is over 50, which mine wasn't the first time but is now. The doctors were very kind and compassionate telling me this though, and they set up the transition to a different hospital so it wasn't difficult at all. Honestly I already knew about their policy so it wasn't an unpleasant surprise, although I am a little disappointed that I won't get to have my baby there again. The MFM at the new hospital is amazing and I like my OB as well.

As far as mentioning that you're obese, none of my doctors have used that word, although it is in my chart. They did mention my weight because of the potential risks, but they phrased it more delicately, like "because you have some extra weight," or things like that. I haven't felt shamed or judged at all.

 

[thundergirl96]

@msyue92 Thankyou for this, it’s really reassured me. And congratulations xx

 

[returntotheway]

@msyue92 How common is the bmi for hospitals thing? This is the first I’ve ever heard such a thing and would like to look into it myself

 

[msyue92]

@returntotheway I think it depends on what facilities they have. My local hospital only has a very basic NICU and I think the reasoning is that higher BMI = higher risk for complications. The city 30 minutes away has two fully equipped hospitals for me to choose from. They also have better ultrasound equipment, and even in my first pregnancy I had to go there to get a more in-depth anatomy scan.

 

[garrettholliman2001]

@thundergirl96 I was 260 at the start of my pregnancy (now 27 weeks) and my doctors have been great with my appointments so far. Nobody has mentioned my specific weight or BMI. My doctor was answering some of my questions and did say something along the lines of, “and at your size…” but he was telling me the facts and answering my question and it didn’t bother me one bit. I asked, lol. I am nervous about being treated differently at my birth (thanks to all the horror stories) and with nurses I don’t know yet, but my friend (also overweight) just had her baby and said everyone was really great and my friend never felt like she couldn’t make her own decisions.

 

[thundergirl96]

@garrettholliman2001 Thankyou for this, it’s really reassured me that there can be positives. And congratulations! Xx

 

[garrettholliman2001]

@thundergirl96 Congrats to you too!

 

[tschau]

@thundergirl96 I’m am 5’5” and started my pregnancy at 265lbs. My OB never said a word about my weight, ever. I did do research though when selecting an OB and avoided those that women had negative interactions with based on age or weight concerns. The only time my weight was mentioned was on my chart from ultrasounds and it was automatic verbiage regarding my “maternal habitus” I had a very positive pregnancy and honestly a great labor and delivery despite it not going as planned. Due to being there for 24 hours before finally ending in a c-section I saw 2 midwives and a different OB than my primary for delivery and then 1 more during recovery to check my incision and prepare for discharge. Every single one of them were wonderful and I never felt like my care was effected by my weight.

 

[thundergirl96]

@tschau This is great that you’ve had a positive experience and gives me hope I will too! Thankyou xx

 

[tschau]

@thundergirl96 Of course! If the midwife you’ve selected isn’t it, it’s ok to switch and find someone that is going to treat you good! Don’t settle and you will be a-ok!

 

[michelhussey]

@thundergirl96 I was 270 at the start of this pregnancy and I'm about 290 now (34 weeks). I've not dealt with anything negative from my doctors. My OB told me I should only gain 10-15 lbs this entire pregnancy which was scary and sure I'm at 20 lbs gained but it's not a big deal to her. My MFM is absolutely amazing and doesn't bring up weight at all. Congratulations!

 

[thundergirl96]

@michelhussey Great Thankyou so much for the reassurance and congratulations also ! Xx

 

[labradoriansavedbygrace]

@thundergirl96 I was terrified and worried about being labeled “high risk” but not a word was said by my OB or any of the doulas I interviewed. I mentioned it myself, saying I’m worried I’m high risk and won’t be able to have a vaginal birth and they were like you’re fine you’re not high risk if anything changes we can address it but do you and you’ll be fine. Currently 11w5d and around 280. Started closer to 287 so have lost some in the 1st tri

 

[thundergirl96]

@labradoriansavedbygrace Thanks for this ! It’s definitely reassuring to hear, also congratulations! Xx

 

[msyue92]

@labradoriansavedbygrace No one said anything to me about not having a vaginal birth! They told me I was high risk as far as things like Gestational Diabetes and hypertension, but there were never any concerns about needing a C-section because of my weight. For me being high risk just meant extra monitoring and more ultrasounds during the pregnancy.

 

[labradoriansavedbygrace]

@msyue92 Well my concern was high risk turning into an early induction turning into a c section.

 

[hopefulinthebayarea]

@thundergirl96 Besides one midwife who was unkind on the phone because of my weight, I had only positive encounters in both my pregnancies!

 

[thundergirl96]

@hopefulinthebayarea Thankyou for this. It’s reassured me that there is positive encounters. Xx

 

[stephen583]

@thundergirl96 I’m 5’8” and started my pregnancy at 260. I’m 23 weeks and sitting around 263 (I lost then regained weight because of a sugar aversion, but my doctor isn’t concerned). My midwife told me early on that she doesn’t care what my weight looks like, her main concern is that my labs look good and that baby is growing as expected. I also see a MFM, not due to weight but because I have existing hypertension and bipolar disorder and have been on meds through pregnancy, and they have not mentioned my weight either. My A1Cs looked good on my initial bloodwork, and I’m discussing the GD test at my next appointment.

The only time weight has been brought up was with my PCP, who is known to be fatphobic, and told me my back hurt because I was obese and not because I was pregnant at the time (he was wrong). I told my midwife about the interaction (in tears) and she reiterated that she’s unconcerned about my weight, and since that visit has even removed my weight from my post-visit notes. I’m also planning on dropping my PCP because he’s consistently been a jerk.

My general advice to everyone who is plus size and pregnant is to, if you can, find a doctor who will focus on your lab work and development of the baby. If they discuss weight, set boundaries and tell them you want them to focus on these other, far more important items. If they refuse, look for a new doctor. You deserve to be treated with respect both during and outside of pregnancy, regardless of weight.