@davidpark Just let her say those things, but don’t come back and say ‘I told you so’ when there are hard moments. Validate her feelings. There will definitely be a lot of hard things even with all the conveniences you guys have, but she’s allowed to be optimistic while y’all are in the little honeymoon phase of pregnancy
@davidpark I know a lot of parents who want a baby because they're cute. I was a SAHM for my 5 and 7 yr old. That was so rough. I just kept telling myself there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Now my days are spent meal planning and house managing. My friends who have new babies are all struggling because their ideal views if having a baby has been shattered by their new screaming babies.
@davidpark No offense but I find it stupid how much people complain about parenting. Makes you sound like giant babies. Yes, it’s hard but so is just about anything worthwhile.
Your wife has the right attitude. It’s all about mindset and being zen.
@davidpark I was worried it was going to be hard and I’m one week graduated. So far its been a slice. Baby sleeps most of the time and when he actually cries it aint that loud and I honestly find it really cute and little bit entertaining. I’m sure it’ll get harder in the coming months and / years but so far its been great.
@davidpark I would do no convincing, she’s pregnant and that’s stress enough why add more?!?
My hubby was so scared about having our first he was prepared for it being so hard, he was nearly sick over it. Fast forward to baby being here and he says he was so pleasantly surprised it wasn’t bad at all. He wishes now he enjoyed that first pregnancy rather than worrying about baby being here and things being so “terrible”, because it didn’t happen.
@davidpark Those seem to be physical things. We’ve found that it’s actually the mental side to it that has been difficult. My partner has been struggling with PPD, lactation issues and body image issues. This has been way tougher than washing poop off your neck at 3am
@davidpark Wait till the first month of adjustment. The lack of sleep will change her mind. We had to sleep in shifts because our son would only sleep on us the first month and a half. Is she breast feeding? Because that's a whole other obstacle IF it goes right.
@davidpark Parenting is super simple. It really isn't that hard.make sure they eat, they're clean, and they don't die.
Ever try doing something super simple... while completely frazzled and sleep deprived?
That's parenting. It's a non-stop 24/7 marathon that has no definite finish line. Every day, they get bigger and less willing to allow directives 1 and 2 and do everything in their power to test the third
If you're blessed enough to have a support system, it's a little easier. You think less space is good, but there's going to be so much stuff. You'll say it's not necessary, and it's not. You'll want it, though, because it makes life a little bit easier. It is the absolute best misery you will ever experience. At the end of the day, when they're happy and playing. Excited when you walk in the door after a long day at work. It's the greatest thing in the world. I can count on one hand the number of times I've slept in since my daughter was born. 99% by choice.
@davidpark I’m experiencing the opposite. She thinks I think to easy about it. She’s 8 months pregnant now. And honestly, I do think there will be hard times. But I’m actually looking forward to everything so much that I’m not to bothered by those things. I’m very confident I’ll manage, we’ll manage.
And now I think about it, a positive mindset always brought me way more than a negative one. Why change it now?
@davidpark I mean this all comes down to the baby tbh. I had two easy ones thank God. I was getting more sleep with a newborn than I was working.
For me the hard part of parenting is actaully keeping up with all the other things like laundry, walking the dog etc. Sounds like you've catered to all these things.
Like not to downplay it either but you just not gonna know til that baby is here. So why stress it's not going to help.
@davidpark Wife and I married for 10 years and this child has brought us to a breaking point countless times. I think it was a mistake sometimes but almost 2 years later I'm starting to feel the love back from my child... The hard part now is being on the same game plan on discipline.
@davidpark I am a pregnant lady chiming in - to me it sounds like she is scared and is actually saying these things as some kind of pep talk to herself. I say this because this is exactly how I feel lol.
I am pretty scared, but I’m hoping that it can’t possibly be as terrible as people make it sound. After all, people continue to reproduce and even choose to have multiple children!
@davidpark Mom of an 18 mo here. I would try to determine if this her psyching herself/yourself up with positive thinking. Personally, I didn’t have family nearby and a post partum doula was worth every penny. I would consider looking into one for the immediate post partum then transitioning those funds to laundry/cleaning after 6-12 weeks.
I think it would be worth bringing up making a plan b for these scenarios together. Like: yeah I think we can manage that! But what would you want to do if we actually started struggling with sleep deprivation, feeding problems, feeling over whelmed? Its better to have a plan you can execute should you need it
