I f**ed up!

@poppa51 I didn’t baby wear my first because I was so afraid I was doing something wrong! Now that I’m having a second and will have to…if you see me in the store doing something wrong please tell me!!
 
@poppa51 I see no issue since this is a matter of safety. A mom did this to me when I was baby-carrying, forward facing (she wasn’t high enough so bad for her hips) and I thanked her.
 
@poppa51 Nahhhh you were trying to be polite and nice. She didn’t need to react that way. It’s one thing being like “oh why doesn’t your baby have socks on” and it’s a whole different thing when you’re trying to tell someone they are using their carrier in a way where it can harm their child.
 
@poppa51 Personally I don't think you were in the wrong, your intentions were good and out of concern for the babies safety, I've had one of my mum friends gently correct me on something before and I never took it the wrong way I was grateful then went on to do my own research because I know she's has a good heart and she's never looking to correct others to feel better about herself.
 
@poppa51 You meant well and that's all that matters. The fact that this interaction is still on your mind shows that you care. You care about her baby's saftey and you care about another mother's feelings. You seem like a good person đź’– Don't be so hard on yourself.
 
@poppa51 No, you didn’t. It’s ok, OP. You’re not in the wrong here as long as your tone was ok and you came from a good place.
 
@poppa51 Honestly I think you did nothing wrong. Carriers are notoriously hard to figure out and you were giving friendly advice and not criticizing her parenting choices. She was probably having a hard day.
 
@poppa51 Don’t feel bad, I find it really silly when people get offended about advice regarding their child’s safety. I once asked for advice in a car seat safety group and a lot of people gently advised me about how I needed to adjust my baby’s seat and seatbelt better and I was so grateful for their help as I was clueless at the time. I’ll gladly take any tips if it comes to keeping my child safe and healthy
 
@poppa51 Never feel bad for telling someone this, even if they respond in embarrassment (or just advice fatigue) this is so important to know. I read this article two months after I had my baby, and I had not been babywearing correctly. Better to be prompted by an unsolicited comment to look into it further, than to find out the bad way that you’re babywearing unsafely. You did the right thing, what that mum does with the information is up to her.

Edit: spelling

https://amp.theguardian.com/austral...ay-unconscious-in-soft-sling-nsw-inquest-told
 
@poppa51 Idk, I would absolutely love for someone to share with me if I was wearing my carrier unsafe. As a FTM who’s deeply confused on baby wearing, Ive gone out hoping someone says something if they see something !
 
@poppa51 This happened to me yesterday I saw a dad wearing his tiny baby, he looked so proud! I didn’t have the balls to tell him that the baby was too low.
I could tell how the carrier was hanging so low and the baby was not in the right position.
I was at Costco in Cabo so I wasn’t sure how the dad would have reacted.
When I was in his shoes I would have appreciated someone showing me how to wear my baby correctly. I wasn’t able to wear her the first couple months cause she hated it and after changing carrier and figuring out what I was doing wrong by error and trial. I would have appreciated OP showing me how to fix it.
 
@poppa51 I’m always trying to buckle my baby’s carseat properly and I tried really hard when she was born, but I look at some of her pictures and I am mortified at how badly she was harnessed sometimes. I really wish I had someone there all the time double checking.
As far as carriers, I’m pretty sure I didn’t feel safe using them till she was around 6mo because I always felt like her face was buried even if I did it exactly as the instructions said.
 
@poppa51 Omg I feel you! I live in a country where people raise kids based on how their parents and grandparents raised kids, with little to no research of their own. I see a lot of unsafe practices everyday and people just can't take any feedback. Most people do stuff like cosleeping with blankets and pillows and soft mattresses, wearing baby front-facing in a non-ergonomic carrier, using side protectors for crib and putting blanket on baby, giving baby salt and sugar before 1yo and if you try to say anything they shut you off. It's a very scary level of ignorance that most parents raise their kids on around here. So I just shut up and pray that those babies will be okay. But it makes me extremely sad.
 
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