@hisvictor My brother suffered from what I now realize was Oppositional Defiant Disorder. It made my life as his sibling a living hell. It made my parents life a living hell. He needed medical grade intervention but my parents could never admit how bad it was in order to get to that point.
@youfailme I run a school program that provides services for kids who need therapeutic intervention. Sometimes it works really well, and sometimes it doesn’t. It depends on a lot of factors. When parents are involved and working together with service providers, there is usually progress
@cliquely Yup.. Can't help but resent them (sister for me), but at the same time feel terrible that you do because it's not like they chose to be that way.
@cloudssync There's good evidence it's very similar to ADHD in some ways too, and the same meds that help kids with ADHD can help a lot of kids with ODD as well! Alongside parental involvement and therapy, those kids can make a ton of progress, and can even go on to live totally normal and well-regulated adult lives with enough help during childhood.
@cliquely I’ve a cousin with that diagnosis. I thought, to myself, is that a real thing. Then I spent a whole day with the kid. It’s so real. I remember his mom said, sit down or you won’t go to the park and we’ll stay inside doing nothing. He immediately stood up more and said he wanted to stay inside and do nothing. Like little dude, of course you want to go to the park. But that drive is so strong. And it was so hard for his parents. He was kicked out of kindergarten. Then first grade. He wouldn’t potty train.
Buuuuut fast forward 12 years, that kid is doing effing fantastic by every modern measure. The defiance that left is minor and hell maybe he’ll challenge injustice in the world and not take no for an answer! I’m so glad his mama did research and got effective tools and didn’t just try to break his spirit. Good luck!
@hisvictor How verbal is your 4 yo? I had a terrifying experience when my kid was about 3.5 at a park where he just took off right towards the street. We caught him literally just in time. He also would run out of daycare as well when he first started. They did social stories with him and that helped some. He stopped leaving the classroom. Perhaps you could get a few library books about not wandering away.
A tracker is fine and all, but I would definitely recommend alternative methods as well to explain why you don't run away. And if you are concerned he won't respond to that or cannot control his impulses, it might be worth a visit to the pediatrician.
@dierato Very verbal. This was clearly him acting out. He was so scared when he got brought home by his dad. We just cried and cried. Books about not wandering away? I’m open to it. Stranger danger shit. Yes.
@hisvictor Be careful with the "stranger danger" thing. On the whole, strangers are much more likely to help a lost kid find their parents than to harm them. You don't want to scare your kid into not asking for help if he's lost.
