I’m at a loss

llg06

New member
My son is 3 months old today. We’ve been EFF since about 1 week. He still wakes up 2-3 times a night to feed. I’m so tired. I try to pump him with extra food during the day and he just isn’t having it. I thought by now we’d be down to maybe 1-2 feedings. Any help will be appreciated 🥺
 
@llg06 Have you tried a dream feed? That way he gets a few extra calories before bed? My buddy is 10 months old and I found that sometimes he actually ate better if I spaced bottles out properly (2.5-3 hrs). Then he could actually get hungry.
 
@llg06 A friend of mine who had EFF 3 kids suggested “a big long meal” before bed. She said to make a slightly larger bottle and let baby take as long as they need up to the full hour. She said that the big bedtime bottle worked way better for her than spreading calories over all daytime feeds. We tried it (added 1 ounce to his last bottle when he was about 2 months) and just took it slowly. He slept his longest stretch ever that night, which was 5 hours.

I will say, I’ve heard baby sleep is not linear and that is no joke. He slept really well for what felt like ages and then all of a sudden he was learning to sit and crawl and then teething and it was 6 weeks of struggle. Last 3 nights? Great sleep! Tonight? Who knows!
 
@llg06 Waking to eat 2-3 times a night at that age is incredibly normal. He’s barely even out of the newborn potato phase right now. It should get better eventually without intervention, but you can actively start night weaning once he’s 6 months old. In the meantime, do you have a partner at home? Can they handle at least one of the wakes?

Hang in there ❤️
 
@llg06 Have you tried to feed more often during the day?
If you feed during the day every 3 hours, and do a “dream feed” right before you go to bed (10-10:30 pm), baby might last longer.
I followed 12 hours sleep under 12 weeks and Taking Cara babies course and baby had only one feed at night until around 5-6 weeks, and then just kept doing “dream feed” and baby slept until 6:30-7 am.
In the taking Cara babies course, they say that many parents give a bottle or a boob when baby just needs a pacifier/swaddled or rocked.
The goal is to start dropping those feeds at night and give less and less food at night and more during the day.
My pediatrician said that at 8 weeks old they are developmentally ready to sleep 12 hours straight.
 
@llg06 It’s normal, I’m sorry. Hopefully it won’t last too much longer. Since you’re EFF now can you split the night with your partner? Or alternate nights on baby duty?

My husband and I split the night in shifts until our baby was down to one night feed at around 4 months. Then we alternated nights. We’re still doing that at 8 months and just in the last couple of weeks she’s dropped her 5 am feed.
 
@llg06 All babies are different. My first son woke up like 2 times a night until like 9 months and still wakes up off and on now at 2.5.

My baby now started sleeping through the night without feeding at 3 months.

There isn't really a "normal."

I do feel understand your tiredness, but feeding more during the day won't necessarily help.
 
@llg06 We have been using the schedules found in the book “mom’s on call”. Our son is 3 months old today. He’s been on the schedules since 1 month. He follows the schedule absolutely perfectly. It’s really been a complete life saver. As of now, we put him to bed at 7:30pm, he wakes up once somewhere between 3:30am and 5:00am to eat. Then back to bed until his next bottle at 7:00am.

I work an odd schedule (4pm-midnight), and this schedule allows us both to get a solid 6-8 hours of sleep. I usually come home, in bed by 1:00am, I do the 4:00ish feeding, then go back to bed and sleep until 8-9am. My fiancee goes to bed around 10pm and pretty much sleeps until his 7:00am feeding. I really can’t get over how awesome this schedule is. Honestly, we could just have a great baby in terms of sleep, but it also could be entirely attributed to the schedule, or a mix of both. But, either way, it’s working out great.
 
@clau We also used Moms on Call for our first baby, who slept 12 hours without feeding by 8 weeks, and will be doing so for our 2nd (she's only 2 weeks old so jury's out on how it will work).

I think our previous success was a combination of: 1) having a good sleeper and good eater to begin with, 2) getting wake windows right, 3) putting her down "drowsy but awake" and not feeding to sleep.
 
@llg06 Having night feeds like that at 3 months can be totally normal and every baby is different, however, for both of my babies, finding an appropriate nap schedule/wake windows help get them enough sleep pressure to reduce night feeds. We particularly love Precious Little Sleep book and the FB group access that you get with the book as both the author herself and moderators help troubleshoot sleep challenges. It’s been a live saver for us with both kids!
 
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