@shanaynay It’s so SO hard. My 14 month old woke up at 10:30 last night, wouldn’t fall asleep again until 2:00am, and woke up again at 5:45am. I am an attorney by day and a mama at all times, but I am STRUGGLING with the lack of sleep. One day at a time — I just really try to keep things in perspective that this is all setting my son up for good emotional health.
@musicismath Hi! Sorry for the question completely unrelated to this post, but how has life been working as an attorney while being a mama? How long have you been practicing and do you think going to law school while having a baby at home would be feasible? My dad did it while I was a newborn but he also wasn’t the birthing parent or primary caretaker.
I’ve had an itch to make the career switch for years (teacher here!) and I know I would be going from one very high stress job to another, but I just can’t shake the feeling of wanting to make the plunge. I have multiple attorneys in the family so I feel like I have a more realistic expectation of the job, but all of them are men or child free women. My current hesitation is having a 6 month old cling on (and the cost of law school lol) but I haven’t even taken the LSAT so I know she’d be older by the time I did actually start any schooling. So sorry for the ramble, but I’d appreciate any thoughts you want to share! Feel free to DM me if you have a moment!
@shanaynay Do you have a partner who can let you sleep in in the mornings? That’s what I did until 1 year, then we started trading off nights. Her sleep is no better at 15m, so unfortunately making it through the first year might not change anything
@shanaynay My baby is 12 weeks and my sleep schedule looks pretty much like yours except I sleep later and pump before bed. Earlier today I wondered out loud if I was dying because I've never felt so sleep deprived. I don't know how long I can keep doing this
@redrosie1029 Hey friend, I’ve been in your shoes. Everyone’s baby is different so you really can’t compare timelines but the newborn stage is almost always the hardest. Baby sleep ebbs and flows, you will get good nights and even good weeks. If you can set up a safe bedsharing place (safe sleep 7) you will maximize sleep. Good luck! You will get through this! Early morning light, lots of proteins, and Omega fats.
@shanaynay My daughter was like this, some nights she would wake up every 45 minutes. She's 26 months now and (mostly) sleeps through the night. I can't tell you much about her smaller days because I was so sleep deprived. We didn't sleep train but one particular night I physically could not get out of bed. Nine days of almost total sleep deprivation will do that, she cried for an hour. I beat myself up about it for weeks. I saw someone say one day at a time and it's 100 percent true!
@shanaynay You could always do what my MIL suggested to me and swing baby upside down by the ankles. It's supposed to switch their days and nights around.
@shanaynay You can start to put boundaries. A huge part of parenting is teaching babies how will they just self teach?? If they only know one way to sleep they don't magically learn other ways. Grown kids can be told but babies need to be shown. What'd baby's schedule? You don't have to cio to sleep train. I ssr with my baby and picked up and put down a million times. Yes they cried bc they were mad and confused but I helped them through it. Then they slept all night. Your health is important too
@shanaynay I don't know and I feel the exact same with a 9mo
My partner is very pro CIO but does not pressure me. I feel so desperate sometimes I wonder if he's right, but I know he's not I'm just freaking exhausted. He doesn't say it, but I feel sometimes he thinks I deserve to be tired because I don't sleep train. I don't want to destroy myself for my baby but I don't know where to draw the line either
@albinoguitman He doesn't say that so maybe I'm making it up, I think he just feels the solution is obvious. Yes thank you, we do cosleep which helps me get through each night!
@shanaynay Cosleeping has saved my sleep. He still wakes about maybe four to eight times a night, but I don't wake so fully and feel reasonably rested.
My tiredness is manageable so long as I also take myself to bed at a reasonable hour - in bed by nine pm. I have to be really strict with myself to not mess about on my phone until ten pm, because that hour sleep makes a huuuuge difference. Baby (toddler now - weeps) does let me do a couple of hours of sleep in my own bed, before I transition into his floor bed. I do find I get some really lovely deep sleep those first few hours. Husband generally does the first 'settling' session for the first wake up.
So top tips:
Cosleeping
Ideally shifts with partner / outsource one wake up do you get a slightly longer sleep
Maintain a really strict, boring bedtime for yourself
Oh also agree try to feed them something filling before bed. We often give greek yoghurt, which he quite likes.
