How do u set up playdates for 3year old?

[eutychus2018]

I have a playful but shy 3 year old boy. He goes to daycare (preschool class) full time and my husband and I work full time. He generally has a good time at daycare (per teacher) but I don't really see him make friends. I want to set up a playdate with my son's classmate to help him make connections at daycare. When I go to pick him up, he usually just runs towards me, I briefly talk to the teacher and we leave. He doesn't seem to have a close friend in particular. When I see him he's just running around on his own (they are usually out in the field). I don't really see other parents and if I do, they are busy picking up their kid and heading home. I have another parents phone number and I've suggested doing a playdate sometime but it never happened as my kid never really showed interest in the other kid. I guess I'm a little shy myself and I find it awkward to strike up a conversation at pick up with other parents when my kid is not really interested in other kids.

Any tips? I thought about putting my phone number on goody bags at next opportunity (I'm thinking valentines) but I've never seen other parents do this so I worry it might look odd.

He does have cousins his age he sees regularly but I think it might help more to do some playdates with his classmates.

 

[spacecadet3767]

@eutychus2018 Honestly...if your kid isn't (yet) super social with peers, and they go to daycare every day, I'd just let it be. My older one was like that, when we'd do things with other kids he'd totally ignore them. Very awkward for the parents lol.

I suspect your kid will warm up to other children soon enough! But it's range of normal to be less interested in other kids at 3.

 

[eutychus2018]

@spacecadet3767 Thank you.. that's reassuring. He has 2 cousins that are the same age and they are way more social.. sometimes it's hard to tell what's normal

 

[spacecadet3767]

@eutychus2018 my second kid is a social butterfly, kids are just different! First kid also got way more interested in peers around age 4, he's a happy and social 8yo who is very well liked, makes friends easily.

 

[sithdoughnut]

@eutychus2018 We have had families send a note home via daycare saying “My kid wants to do a playdate with your kid. Text me!” with a phone number. It’s very friendly and not weird at all! I’d wait until your child has someone they actually want to play with, as others said.

 

[jesuschrist4life]

@eutychus2018 We didn't. Outside of daycare, we would go to parks, zoos, etc and the kids would play with other kids who were there. We also played with neighbors.

We didn't start with structured play dates with a specific person until the kids were in kindergarten.

 

[smccla]

@eutychus2018 As the other commenter said, your son is getting plenty of social interaction at daycare. Many 3 year olds don't have "friends" in the way we think of friends. That will start to develop within a year or two.

 

[kchibikko]

@eutychus2018 Is there a mailing list or something for the daycare class? One thing we've done is to email all the parents and say we'll be at X playground on Saturday morning if others want to join. But that was more for us to meet and chat to the parents. Sounds like your child isn't much in need of playdates yet.

 

[davidseven]

@eutychus2018 We didn’t. I have seen people do like, business cards with their info on them for playdates.

Honestly, if you’re looking for more interaction, I’d try an afternoon or weekend class for your kiddo. Like soccer, swimming, or gymnastics. It’s great for parent interaction and if you have a rambunctious kid, it helps wear them out on the weekends.

 

[katrina2017]

@eutychus2018 I would ask the teacher if they have any insight. Does he not know how to ask other kids to join in? Is she very shy? How does he play when he plays with his cousins? Does one of the cousins drive the play

Maybe once you get some more detail role play how you ask someone to play a game etc

 

[eutychus2018]

@katrina2017 That's a good idea. He's shy. He's generally better at playing when there's 1 kid near him, but once there's more than 1, he usually keeps to himself (and seems happy to do so)