@plantlover Thank you 
may I ask how your oldest is doing now?
may I ask how your oldest is doing now?
Feeling mom guilt over 3 year old attending Pre K due to speech delay
plantlover
New member
@inofk71 Oh man, I kind of miss the days when she only had five words because she never shuts up now, lol. But I had a friend comment the other day about how clear her speech had gotten and Iāve noticed that strangers are able to understand her relatively well. I think weāre getting close to the end of needing speech therapy and OT which is really kind of sad, she absolutely adores her therapists.
@plantlover Iām so glad sheās doing so well 
janefairlight
New member
@plantlover Our oldest is the same! 
I was just reassuring my sister that her 2 yo WILL eventually talk, and telling her to remember that it took our oldest until 3.5 to really start speaking and now at 5 we canāt get her to pipe down. She still has speech issues that we are working on, but she has come SUCH a long way. I remember how scary those early days were when it felt like sheād never get there 
I was just reassuring my sister that her 2 yo WILL eventually talk, and telling her to remember that it took our oldest until 3.5 to really start speaking and now at 5 we canāt get her to pipe down. She still has speech issues that we are working on, but she has come SUCH a long way. I remember how scary those early days were when it felt like sheād never get there katrina2017
New member
@inofk71 Youāre doing the right thing, my friend. Donāt feel guilty. Itās nothing you have done.
I have worked in a classroom for children with autism for a while now and pre-k was my favorite. I met one boy when he was non verbal at age 3; no functional language, just jargon. I recently saw him in middle school speaking in full sentences - initiating conversation.
My cousinās son was non-verbal until the age of 3.5, maybe? Went into a full time pre-k program and has improved so much.
My point is, youāre doing the right thing. Your son will make gains. They might happen super fast, or it could happen gradually over time. But it will happen and itās because you recognized he needed some extra help and you got it for him.
I have worked in a classroom for children with autism for a while now and pre-k was my favorite. I met one boy when he was non verbal at age 3; no functional language, just jargon. I recently saw him in middle school speaking in full sentences - initiating conversation.
My cousinās son was non-verbal until the age of 3.5, maybe? Went into a full time pre-k program and has improved so much.
My point is, youāre doing the right thing. Your son will make gains. They might happen super fast, or it could happen gradually over time. But it will happen and itās because you recognized he needed some extra help and you got it for him.
@katrina2017 Thank you for the reassurance Iāll do anything to help my little man
Iāll do anything to help my little man@inofk71 I was there. My daughter is 8 now and thriving. She actually turned out to be partially deaf and it was HARD itās okay to feel all the feels. We went and worked hard and gave her all the tools possible to succeed and itās just about taking it a day at a time. Sending love your way. Itās so hard to not feel guilty but you are doing everything right love.
christ4life1
New member
@inofk71 Iām an elementary school SLP and used to work in EI. I want to echo (from a professionalās perspective) that you havenāt done anything wrong! We donāt know exactly why some kids have a language delay, but it is ABSOLUTELY and UNEQUIVOCALLY not your fault. Iām so proud of you for recognizing how you can help your child and choosing to put in the work for him
@christ4life1 Thank you for your kind words Iām hoping that with some more private speech therapy and Pre K Iāll finally hear his little voice
Iām hoping that with some more private speech therapy and Pre K Iāll finally hear his little voicecaspianrex
New member
@inofk71 We were in the exact same position. Did a year and a half through covid of early intervention. At 3, I got him in the school system, and it's the best thing we ever did. He is 5 and in kindergarten now. He still receives speech services as well. His language goes in spurts. He adds large amounts of words at a time to his vocabulary and then stalls for a little bit, and we repeat the cycle. He has sight words and does phenomenal with those as well often scoring 100's.
What we didn't know and likely would have never figured out was his love and skill for math. He is adding and subtracting large numbers already and counting to 100 +. His pre-k teacher discovered this and helped foster it while he was in her class. He impressed a few 5th grade teachers last night at a school night out event.
He will grow friendships, and you will have advocates for him at the school. It's hard not to feel like you failed, but some kids are just delayed. Now my son talks all the time and will tell me often he is talking for his baby sister. We have to play the quiet game some days so his dad and I can think!
What we didn't know and likely would have never figured out was his love and skill for math. He is adding and subtracting large numbers already and counting to 100 +. His pre-k teacher discovered this and helped foster it while he was in her class. He impressed a few 5th grade teachers last night at a school night out event.
He will grow friendships, and you will have advocates for him at the school. It's hard not to feel like you failed, but some kids are just delayed. Now my son talks all the time and will tell me often he is talking for his baby sister. We have to play the quiet game some days so his dad and I can think!
@caspianrex Thatās so awesome about your son! Iām really hoping Pre K opens up a whole new world for him, Iām so anxious to hear his little voice and to hear him call me āmamaā.
Thank you for response
Thank you for response
texasstars
New member
@inofk71 My older child had a speech delay. She received early intervention for about a year, then went to public Pre K for 2 years, receiving speech therapy while there. At the very end of the second year of preschool, she dramatically improved. She went from hardly speaking to being the loudest kid in her gymnastics class. She started kindergarten at 5 and has been doing well there.
After all this, Iāve come to realize for her it was part of who she is. She is methodical, likes to fully process things before she speaks, and occasionally still needs a minute to process more complex thoughts. Then I looked at my husband and realize they share a lot of similarities. Sometimes they get lost in whatever activity they find interesting, so much so they literally donāt hear you unless you get really close and/or keep repeating what youāre saying. But itās that same superpower that helps my husband hone in on his work. For my daughter, she just needed that time to focus and process what she wanted to say. Someday I think her ability to focus and methodically process things will help her. In the meantime, we just encourage her. She has done so well and we are so proud of her. Thereās nothing I could have done that would have changed who she is, nor would I want to. Of course, itās much easier looking back and I had similar feelings as you did at the time. We are rooting for you and your son!!
After all this, Iāve come to realize for her it was part of who she is. She is methodical, likes to fully process things before she speaks, and occasionally still needs a minute to process more complex thoughts. Then I looked at my husband and realize they share a lot of similarities. Sometimes they get lost in whatever activity they find interesting, so much so they literally donāt hear you unless you get really close and/or keep repeating what youāre saying. But itās that same superpower that helps my husband hone in on his work. For my daughter, she just needed that time to focus and process what she wanted to say. Someday I think her ability to focus and methodically process things will help her. In the meantime, we just encourage her. She has done so well and we are so proud of her. Thereās nothing I could have done that would have changed who she is, nor would I want to. Of course, itās much easier looking back and I had similar feelings as you did at the time. We are rooting for you and your son!!
@texasstars Thank you for your kind words Iām so hoping Pre K is the key to his language explosion!
Iām so hoping Pre K is the key to his language explosion!@inofk71 This happened with my son. Got him evaluated when he was 2, he had in home services provided by the state. Turned 3 and got an IEP, was sent to speech twice a week, but he wouldnāt stay he just cried and cried so no school speech for him. Instead we took him to weekly speech sessions and he got about 6 months worth of sessions, those were through our health insurance, he made some progress and we we were happy but he was still not speaking appropriately for his age. When he was a a little over 3.5 years old he started talking so much, clearly and in two languages. Your sweet boy will get there, give him some time.
@solomayne Thank you for the reassurance, thatās awesome about your son!
@inofk71 It really is.
I had forgotten that my oldest also had a similar problem. She did not fully speak in 2-3 word phrases until she was 3. Sheās perfectly fine now, except she has trouble pronouncing the r in Spanish, but her English is perfect. The middle one could speak in complete 3-5 word sentences by 1.5. All kids are different. They talk when they want to. Your son will too. The speech therapist said that sometimes kids are not talking but they are listening so once they let loose they will start saying a lot of words because theyāve been listening this whole time.
I had forgotten that my oldest also had a similar problem. She did not fully speak in 2-3 word phrases until she was 3. Sheās perfectly fine now, except she has trouble pronouncing the r in Spanish, but her English is perfect. The middle one could speak in complete 3-5 word sentences by 1.5. All kids are different. They talk when they want to. Your son will too. The speech therapist said that sometimes kids are not talking but they are listening so once they let loose they will start saying a lot of words because theyāve been listening this whole time.