Ex wants son to travel to TX from IL and I don’t, am I overreacting?

[jeniforjesus]

Me (mom): laid off due to Covid (event planner), live in Springfield, IL with our 12-year-old son and his 2 cats. IL is on lockdown through the end of this month. We haven’t been with family or friends since 4/3, minimal trips out for me only with mask, shower once home.

Dad: lives in Houston, TX area with his parents. He is a waiter part time at a restaurant open to dine-in with restrictions. Plans to take our son to Frio area of TX with his family, an EMT friend and her 12-year-old who are both from Kansas City and will be driving down. They will stay in a rented cabin while in Frio.

Situation: Dad agreed to my respectful refusal to send our son on a flight from St. Louis to Houston but is adamant that we drive. I don’t believe the exposure he’ll have while in TX is worth the potential risk. If it’s not safe to be in a classroom with his peers a few blocks away, how is parading around Texas ok? Also, I’m not a doctor so I’m open to being wrong. We’ve been divorced for 10.5 years and I’ve only ever denied visitation once in the past when dad refused to administer medication prescribed by our doctor. Dad has always had the ability to call/FaceTime/skype/play PlayStation online w our son- communication pipeline is wide open he just doesn’t take advantage of it and I don’t press it.

What do I do here? I mean, I can go to a court and get an emergency order but I genuinely want to know if I’m wrong and should be sending our son. I’d love any opinions or advice you might have. TIA!

 

[newcombe2]

@jeniforjesus Refuse and offer dad make up time later when the virus is not so prevalent.

 

[jeniforjesus]

@newcombe2 Thanks, I have. We are working outside our custody agreement since dad moved to Texas a couple years ago. I’ve always said yes to visits in the past, as he’s never taken the “every other weekend” he was given from the jump.

Thanks again. I’ve really been struggling with this, I don’t want to be a bad guy.

 

[jodilynn]

@jeniforjesus Please delay any trips. Texas has a rapidly increasing Covid rate. They may even go back into lockdown. This is because Texans are all "ten feet tall and bullet proof". Keep your son safe in IL where you can monitor him. Let him go visit when this is over. (Probably around the time when your son can vote or legally buy beer.)