Everyone thinks I’m crazy. Am I?

[tisanewseason]

@jessica It’s exhausting isn’t it!!!

 

[frknfly]

@tisanewseason You’re not crazy at all. You’re just trying to parent in the way that works best for you and babygirl and others aren’t understanding that. The western cultures are obsessed with making babies sleep independently; it’s just deeply woven into the fabric of society. So that’s probably where you’re getting pushback. Keep doing what works for you and know that it’s 1000% biologically and emotionally normal and nurturing for both you and your baby.

 

[tisanewseason]

@frknfly Thank you for your validation, I appreciate it

 

[shinesobright]

@tisanewseason I needed this post! Thank you so much (typing this as he naps with one arm on my arm and his leg against my knee) 16 months

 

[tisanewseason]

@shinesobright You’re welcome! I needed the space to vent so thank you for listening! Currently back in our happy place, very much as you describe, arm on my arm & legs on my tummy

Enjoy your snuggles

 

[katrina2017]

@tisanewseason Our 11.5 month old does 95% of naps on dad, in the ergobaby, on the treadmill or outside walking. 5% boob in mouth with me. He loves it. We love having him close. We love how reliable ergobaby naps are for getting him to go down without a single tear. I don’t know what the plan is when we have a second, but that’s no reason to change how we do things with our first when it works for us.

 

[tisanewseason]

@katrina2017 Yes!! Carrier naps are brilliant too. I used to do a lot more of them but I just wana lie down too these days I reserve them for special days out only now, once a month or so. So sweet that dad is able to spend so much time with him too! My husband sweats too much to carry her for naps

 

[runge12]

@tisanewseason This would drive me crazy but I would never ever tell another mom who wanted to do this otherwise. You do you girl. Whatever feels right for you and your daughter.

 

[tisanewseason]

@runge12 It’s funny because I never imagined that this would be my path! Pre baby I was telling my husband he would have to sleep on the baby’s side so he could just pass her to me when she needed feeding and then he could resettle her afterwards I was all about having my space. Now I wake up if she’s not squished right into my armpit wondering when she’s gona wake up and slide back in hahah

 

[providenciaet]

@tisanewseason We did all contact naps! By 13 months my kiddo was down to one nap a day and trust, I still really needed that nap so we napped together. Honestly I miss it! They don’t nap forever and then you’re still stuck with those issues of when do you get things done etc. So I have zero regrets of spending all that time cuddling and nursing and napping and reading.

 

[tisanewseason]

@providenciaet YES THIS! What about when they stop napping altogether, how will I ever get anything done then you make such a good point and I’d never thought about that, I’m using it next time. Thanks!!

 

[harsin101]

@tisanewseason A reminder for myself, you, and all the other parents: Do. What. Works. For. You.

If your babe gets sleep this way and you are okay with it, do it. You aren't crazy. It's your life. She'll be fine.

 

[tisanewseason]

@harsin101 thanks so much. I honestly love it, it’s my down time too!!

 

[question10]

@tisanewseason I’m so glad you posted this. I’m in tears from all of these supportive comments. I was looking for a non cry it out sleep training method and Google led me to this. I have a 15 month old who is the exact same way. She’s only ever contact napped, sleeps with the boob or she’ll start fussing to look for it to stay asleep, and I have to put her down like I’m defusing a bomb (just recently this month started laying her next to me during naps) and even that only lasts about 5 minutes before she starts looking for the boob and I pick her back up. As I read these I realized YES it’s normal. This is normal, it’s society that’s made us think it’s not. Babies were never born wanting to sleep in a robot bassinet or a crib, they want to sleep with us.

I’m having to remind myself now that this is why I decide to parent this baby the way I wanted. I listened to everyone else with my first and I regret all the time missed because it really isn’t forever. He’s 10 now and I’m lucky if I get a high five. After him we had another baby who passed away at a week old and I got to hold him only once. I promised myself I would never feel bad about holding my baby because of that. So forget everyone else. If their baby sleeps in a crib, great. If you can only work around your baby’s schedule, great. It isn’t forever. One day will be the last day you get to hold them for a nap and you’ll hate it if you let other people talk you into that faster. Parent at your pace and in your way. Parent what feels right for you and your baby, not Jane down the street. You only have a baby for such a short time, everything else will always be there. I’m gonna go hold my baby now

 

[tisanewseason]

@question10 Diffusing a bomb is correct

You’re so welcome! I needed to vent and I’m just grateful there are people who are willing to listen and give advice. I’m so glad to know it helped you too.

I’m so very very sorry to hear about your second baby, nothing I can say will be of any consolation to you but please know I’m sending hugs your way. Go sniff your baby’s head while she sleeps with you mama

 

[fhf1]

@tisanewseason Mom of three here, with two preteens and a 14mo. LO has contact napped since birth, but in a carrier. Different carriers for different stages of growth. If you ever decide you need/want to get stuff done while they nap try putting LO on you in a carrier while awake and tired then nurse to sleep, they’ll still have your heartbeat to keep comfy while they sleep. Mine likes to fall asleep to 90s alternative music and then sleeps 1-2 hours on me or my partner while we go about our day. It’s just what’s worked for us. Do what works and you’ll adapt if/when you need to. I would’ve loved to contact nap with my first but couldn’t get the latch right. I still fed her a breast milk bottle and slept next to her for her whole nap. It’s not just for directly breastfed babies! Mama needs the contact too. Then with my second I contact napped while my first napped with us or played quietly while her sibling slept. It sounds like a special bond you have with your LO. Good for you!

 

[tisanewseason]

@fhf1 Thank you so much great to hear your differing experiences with each of your babies. The carrier is a great way to contact nap but without being tied down to a specific place! We carrier nap when out and about with a sneaky boob, which my friends without kids always find fascinating but definitely less often than I used to now she’s gotten heavier and her naps are longer. This culture of putting your baby down has really damaged our ability to lean into our instincts & biological norms. It’s tragic really.

 

[fhf1]

@tisanewseason Oh yes the sneaky boob is a special talent of mine as well!! We have the Tula and Ergo original carriers that go up to 40 lb, LO is 23lb now. The Tula is better for me to wear because of the high back and DH prefers the Ergo Organic because it’s soft. Baby gets put down to practice walking and to explore. If LO asks for up, it’s up they go!

 

[tisanewseason]

@fhf1 Mines been walking since 9.5 months (14mo now) but when we’re out no one would ever know because she loves being in the sling so much that she’s rarely down on the ground

 

[anceadcathach]

@tisanewseason Why are people so invested in things that have literally no impact on them??? If it's working for you, it's working! End of story.