Do people with kids work *harder*?

[sniffaroo]

@whitm11 I just think the hustle and grind American work culture isn’t permeating to the younger generations because they’re not seeing any payoff from working harder. If you’re never going to be able to buy a house or retire no matter how hard you work, why would you work hard?

 

[whitm11]

@sniffaroo I don't disagree, but this is also a depressing thought.

 

[kedata]

@whitm11 From my experience, hard working people keep working hard. Laidback people remain laidback.
Nothing to do with their family commitments or age group. Everything to do with their working styles and work life balance approach.

 

[katrina2017]

@whitm11 Idk about your office but I'm 39, have young kids, and I absolutely never give anything at work my "all." I don't have the care or capacity

If I had a passion for the work I bet I would

 

[jblazy]

@whitm11 This is super biased and discriminatory. There is nothing wrong with not working outside of working hours. Everyone has the right to their privacy and personal time. Maybe they aren't being paid their worth? Maybe the parents are spending more time at work bc their focus is split more?

Correlation does not equal causation - and subjective correlations you've noticed means absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things.

This sort of thinking can get you fired. If you wouldn't say something like this about a parent, you sure as hell shouldn't say it about single people.

I'd encourage you to work through it in therapy/supervision.

 

[whitm11]

@jblazy Oh, I'm in therapy, alright.

 

[clone93]

@whitm11 I am definitely not working harder than I did before kids… because I can’t. Lol!

 

[fakemail]

@whitm11 I don't see this pattern at my work.

 

[living_abundantly]

@whitm11 I have noticed no difference. I can think of two colleagues who don’t have children but work a ton and are really dedicated to the job. It might just be a younger v older thing. Younger people might just be better at setting boundaries on working hours.

 

[spacecadet3767]

@whitm11 Not I. I do good work during the hours I'm paid for and communicate so people know what to expect.

 

[lovergirlz]

@whitm11 We have a pretty good 50/50 split parents and non parents on a wfh team and I do notice that the parents are the ones who can get the deliverables in without working extra hours. I don’t know if it’s because time management is such a big part of life for parents or if it’s because I literally cannot work after a specific time due to daycare pick up, and then by the time I can log back in again, I just want to sleep.

I also do notice that the parents on my team take much, much less PTO. We work with sick kids at home and then for the most part work when we’re sick too. For me it’s because I know there’s worse illnesses lurking in our future and I don’t want to waste pto for just a cold, etc (ie I’m saving them for the stomach bug from hell, or hfm, etc).

 

[whitm11]

@lovergirlz Ugh. I am so with you on that. I have not taken a "me" break in like, forever. Each time I take PTO it's to do something for the kids or for my family or to cover for my husband being out of town.

 

[princessbychrist]

@whitm11 In my experience, no. I worked 7 days a week for years, was always willing to stay late and go above and beyond. Until I had kids…. Now there’s not much that would keep me in the office after 5. I’m not logging back on after they go down, mama is tired.

 

[lemondrops]

@whitm11 I don’t know. I literally prioritize my kids over work, and never do more than I have to. Used to get a ton of overtime but now I don’t care and decline to stay late.

 

[jamesd010391]

@whitm11 I haven’t really noticed this. I have seen research that working moms are more productive than their childless counterparts, but not sure how reliable that is. I’m definitely more efficient since having kids because I don’t work after hours, but my childless coworkers are equally reliable.

 

[kudyapi]

@whitm11 I agree with people saying that boundaries are important and also that is important to avoid creating a bias in your mind that people work harder if they have kids (or don't if they don't).
But reading this did bring up something unexpected in my personal experience. I had previously experienced some serious workplace trauma and even after changing jobs, I was struggling HARD to be motivated to go into work. Everything just felt so pointless and I was in a tough place mentally.... well, I found out I was pregnant and was incredibly sick and nauseous the entire time and couldn't even function. My boss was amazing and understanding and just met me right where I was at with my responsibilities and even let me work remote as much as needed (this is not the norm at my workplace so I highly appreciated the accommodation). I thought for sure after having a baby I'd be even worse at my job.... well now that I'm back it's like I've found new life and energy! This baby really helped me feel like a capable human again and also like I had a purpose. Truly opposite what I imagined.

I know that's not everyone's experience, but I think parenthood can be so positive in unexpected ways and I hope that more workplaces see that ❤ (and create better parental leave and flexible policies that don't punish parents... this flexibility could also benefit people that don't have kids)

 

[imoss]

@whitm11 Gen Z won’t work beyond what we’re paid. If a deadline is missed either the employee sucks OR if severe OT is NEEDED to meet deadlines that’s the employers problem for setting unrealistic goals and deadlines.

 

[isluv4real]

@whitm11 I don’t think working crazy hours means people are working harder. I work hard from 8-4:30 but I’m not working a minute later unless it’s a very extenuating circumstance. I have really good work/life boundaries and 4 kids.

 

[revdstephen]

@whitm11 Nope. I actually took up a flex job which is a 9 to 5 only. Without kids I could have taken more opportunities which were in a bigger city. I actually worked a lot in my 20s. I’m around 40 now and I have to look after my family and my health.

 

[diane44]

@whitm11 I’m preaching to the choir here, but give me a mom over anyone to get things done and multitask — and keep others on track!