graciegirl
New member
My 17 year old has literally going to drive me insane. He has been hanging around some kids from school I can’t stand. School had always been awful. He literally hasn’t passed a math class since 5th grade. He has done summer school and been able to make up the credits with extra help from us and a tutor. Last semester he flunked 3/almost 4 classes. He only passed history because I emailed all the teachers to try and get a plan in place for this semester. The history teacher was the only one who emailed back and said if he turned in an assignment he would pass. My son said he did but he didn’t. I found it in his computer and submitted it so he would at least pass that class. He is in credit recovery with the football coach doing 2 classes and will have to do 2 more online and 1 this summer to be caught up for senior year and that’s if he fails nothing else. I swear he did it on purpose this last semester. He said he hates school and is moving out as soon as he is 18. He will turn 18 in August and won’t graduate til next May.
The kids he is hanging around with he does play football with but one of them didn’t even suit up for a game because of grades. Over the summer I did catch him vaping and he admitted the kid from the team is selling them because his cousin owns a shop. I did make him take a drug test then and nothing showed up but have keep finding them and when I do I throw them away.
He does work but doesn’t make much money. He had quite a bit saved until football started last year and then couldn’t work much. But part of the problem is he buys other people food, drives everyone around wasting his gas. I also see on his bank account him sending people money on PayPal and cash app but he said he didn’t do it.
We have life 360 on his phone but he gets mad at me and turns it off or pauses it. I did put an AirTag in his car because I don’t trust him. He paid for most of his truck but I paid for the rest and pay the insurance. His “friends” have trashed the inside and h has let them. One wrote on the dashboard and back seat with sharpie and have broke stuff inside. I tell him nobody is allowed in it but that gets ignored. He has 2 really good friends he still sees at school and plays video games with but they hate these other friends.
If I let him do anything and tell him what time to be home he will ask to stay longer and I say no he says I said please and will do it anyway. I have taken the keys away but if I don’t let him drive to school he refuses to go and I can’t drag him there. The last time I took his keys and took his brother somewhere he broke our glass screen door.
We did do a therapy appointment that he refused to drive to with me and drove himself. I had to wait outside because the waiting room was getting remolded and I ran to the gas station for 10 minutes and came back and he was in his truck. He said the guy said he didn’t have to stay if he didn’t want to talk. His dr wants to test him for add to see if that’s part of the school problem which he agreed to but now he refuses to do the paperwork.
I am at my wits end trying to figure out what to do. I turn off his internet so he can’t play games. Put screen time on his phone while he is at school but then I have to block his number because I am trying to work and he will text me over and over.
H has only seen his biological dad 2 times in the last 2 years. He had an awesome step dad and he tried to help but he doesn’t know what to do either. My son tells me I am crazy, I am the one that needs therapy. He can scream but if I raise my voice he tells me to stop yelling. He tells me to hit him so he can call the cops.
I tell l him I can’t handle the constant lying and attitude. I have even asked the teachers why they don’t do detention for ditching class anymore. It seems like a lot of the time the teachers only care about the smart kids that are going to go to college. I want him to graduate. I know vaping can cause changes in teens but I am not convinced it’s drugs. He tells me he is moving out when he is 18 and going no contact with me, I know that is coming from his friends. My kids are really spaced apart, he has. 36 year old sister and a 28 year old brother who is disabled. Even his sister tells him you can’t lie to mom, she knows everything.
Sorry this is so long, thank you if you made it through. Just need some advice.
The kids he is hanging around with he does play football with but one of them didn’t even suit up for a game because of grades. Over the summer I did catch him vaping and he admitted the kid from the team is selling them because his cousin owns a shop. I did make him take a drug test then and nothing showed up but have keep finding them and when I do I throw them away.
He does work but doesn’t make much money. He had quite a bit saved until football started last year and then couldn’t work much. But part of the problem is he buys other people food, drives everyone around wasting his gas. I also see on his bank account him sending people money on PayPal and cash app but he said he didn’t do it.
We have life 360 on his phone but he gets mad at me and turns it off or pauses it. I did put an AirTag in his car because I don’t trust him. He paid for most of his truck but I paid for the rest and pay the insurance. His “friends” have trashed the inside and h has let them. One wrote on the dashboard and back seat with sharpie and have broke stuff inside. I tell him nobody is allowed in it but that gets ignored. He has 2 really good friends he still sees at school and plays video games with but they hate these other friends.
If I let him do anything and tell him what time to be home he will ask to stay longer and I say no he says I said please and will do it anyway. I have taken the keys away but if I don’t let him drive to school he refuses to go and I can’t drag him there. The last time I took his keys and took his brother somewhere he broke our glass screen door.
We did do a therapy appointment that he refused to drive to with me and drove himself. I had to wait outside because the waiting room was getting remolded and I ran to the gas station for 10 minutes and came back and he was in his truck. He said the guy said he didn’t have to stay if he didn’t want to talk. His dr wants to test him for add to see if that’s part of the school problem which he agreed to but now he refuses to do the paperwork.
I am at my wits end trying to figure out what to do. I turn off his internet so he can’t play games. Put screen time on his phone while he is at school but then I have to block his number because I am trying to work and he will text me over and over.
H has only seen his biological dad 2 times in the last 2 years. He had an awesome step dad and he tried to help but he doesn’t know what to do either. My son tells me I am crazy, I am the one that needs therapy. He can scream but if I raise my voice he tells me to stop yelling. He tells me to hit him so he can call the cops.
I tell l him I can’t handle the constant lying and attitude. I have even asked the teachers why they don’t do detention for ditching class anymore. It seems like a lot of the time the teachers only care about the smart kids that are going to go to college. I want him to graduate. I know vaping can cause changes in teens but I am not convinced it’s drugs. He tells me he is moving out when he is 18 and going no contact with me, I know that is coming from his friends. My kids are really spaced apart, he has. 36 year old sister and a 28 year old brother who is disabled. Even his sister tells him you can’t lie to mom, she knows everything.
Sorry this is so long, thank you if you made it through. Just need some advice.