Concerns about extreme 'cry it out' for a 10 week old

@gladaonkth Im pretty sure all sleep training/ cry it out methods are now warned and advised against by some national medical boards, Australia being one off the top of my head.
 
@gladaonkth Babies don’t even begin to be able to self soothe until 6 months and it’s not a fully developed skill/ability until 3 years old

This need-neglect culture has driven me insane. Sleep training (CIO, Ferber) are defined as need neglect (key word) and even CIO and Ferber method do not reccomend doing so until at least 4-6 months when a baby is able to suck their own thumb or put a pacifier in their mouth.

10 weeks? That’s insane. And I’m sorry but if your baby is crying so damn hard they vomit and you don’t go to help them, you’re making it worse.

Some babies cry a little before sleep. Letting it go on endlessly for hours until they dissociate and pass out from crying exhaustion and overtiredness, get piss poor sleep and vomit, you’re a piece of shit. (Not you op, them)
 
@izraeli3 It's bad and you should soothe your baby.

But I think you are overshooting the mark.

Babies with colic will cry for hours for no reason

And guess what they turn out fine.

The vomit issue however is strange.

Getting a baby to stop crying is hard.

And they will cry for what ever reasons.
 
@htbarrelracer Babies with colic are being soothed, know their parent is there and trying to be comforting. There’s a huge difference between a baby being held in their parents arms while they cry, and being left alone in the dark to cry. Huge difference.
 
@gladaonkth The CIO method is emotionally damaging for babies. They don’t “self-soothe” they “turn-off”. In building safe and healthy attachments, parent(s) must attend to baby every single time they cry. Crying is COMMUNICATION not manipulation.
 
@forbincol Baby's cry in rem sleep. And settle themselves.

The idea parents must settle every cry and be perfect creates the atmosphere of pressure on new parents.

Lots of baby with colic cry for hours a day are they all emotions dmged?
 
@gladaonkth Yes it is abusive. Even though I am against CIO in general, it isn’t recommended to do it until like 6 months. I would report them at the very least for the monitor thing and the vomit.
 
@gladaonkth My baby naps in my arms for every nap and sleeps with me at night. I have never let her cry for more than a minute. It gives me a physical reaction when she cries, like feels like my heart is breaking. I cannot imagine how this mom is not concerned. And it’s also weird that these parents are not doing their own research. If I took parents advice from my parents, there would be bumpers in my daughters crib and I would be giving her sugar water to sleep. I don’t think cps would do anything because they probably don’t deem leaving her to cry as abuse, but it’s absolutely sad and not effective at that age. And you would think after she vomited they would have never done it again. I worry about this babies future. These parents do not seem to have common sense.
 
@gladaonkth Some say you can start the CIO stuff at 4 months but most of waft I’ve read and did with my first was not before 6 months. In either case 10 weeks is absurd
 
@gladaonkth Yup. This is co-signed abuse. Standard protocol for most gen-x and millennial babies. Aka - the trauma generation.

It is super a hot topic because parents that do it, cant face the favt that they are permanantly damaging their child’s nervous system, and baseline nuero response patterns for life.

There is a couple of great meta-data books and papers about it. One being “The Science of Mother-Infant Sleep.”
 
@gladaonkth I have a friend who successfully sleep trained her infant at 10 weeks old. It was an extreme case where no one was able to function due to strong sleep issues. They hired a sleep consultant, and went at the cry it out method very intentionally and carefully. It had made a world of positive difference in their lives- this is just to say that there is a theoretical world where a 10 week old can be sleep trained to a degree, however- the way this couple is going about it seems to lack the care and tact necessary, and there is no professional guidance.

If it was going to work, it should have worked by now. Clearly something is wrong/ this lil babe isn’t ready for this strategy yet.
 
@gladaonkth Wow these people sound atrocious!! That poor sweet baby girl doesn’t know she hasn’t been abandoned. 😭 this makes me want to break into their house and cuddle that poor thing.
 
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