Burnt the f out

[megan120711]

I’m in school a couple of times a week, and I have a very part-time job about one evening a week. Otherwise I am home with our kids. My husband works roughly 40 hours a week at a coffee shop doing a variety of things there (barista, roasting coffee, education, etc.). MY HOUSE IS SO MESSY!! And not only that, it’s dirty!?! I want to homeschool and enjoy doing things with my kids but everything is always too messy. I tried the flylady system and it was going so good but I couldn’t do it for 3 days while I had 9 hours a day of schooling and my house is overwhelmingly messy/dirty now. I just don’t know how to cope with this. I feel trapped. What do I do? FlyLady was working well but it was truly consuming all my time. I just need it to be simple but I don’t know if there’s time to keep up on it.

 

[bryony]

@megan120711 You need time to clean. Cleaning is time consuming and when you have kids home all day it’s extremely time consuming, like we spend at least a couple of hours a day and it never feels clean enough especially if there’s no time to deep clean. You need to either make time or have someone else clean or live with the mess. I go through periods of time where I can’t clean without dropping something more important but usually they are transient enough that I can pick up the pieces before it gets bad. I also keep Clorox wipes in all the bathrooms and grout brushes in the shower and I multitask while brushing the kids teeth or taking a shower.

You can implement all the systems but if you don’t actually have the time to do them they are all going to be overwhelming.

 

[jeanxon]

@megan120711 Buy all the cleaning wipes. Window wipes, all purpose, Clorox. Keep them handy and wipe any time you see something dirty. Cordless vacuum - same. Never walk past something you can pickup and put away. Have kids do 10 minute tidies with you - set a timer and pick everything up for 10 minutes. Make it a game. Do it twice a day. Fold each persons laundry by type as you’re doing it - stack of pants, stack of shirts, etc - so you can put each thing away efficiently. Makes the chore easier if you can do all like things at once. I have 5 and some days we are fine and other days I’m taking photos of my house to send to childless friends to make them happy about their life choices.

 

[erickbemis]

@megan120711 KC Davis wrote a book called “How to Keep House While Drowning” which might be helpful.

 

[forgiven_ent]

@megan120711 I wanted to write this same post today. My mom is needing extra help with somethings, my kids are homeschooled, I work a couple days a week, and I’m so so tired.

I was walking down the steps and there’s just garbage there .

I found flylady a little overwhelming. I like Dana White and she totally gets me lol. I have very small simple routines which at the moment have gone by the wayside, but I plan on getting back to. Throwing a load of laundry in in the morning, moving it over in the afternoon… At this point I have a lot of clean laundry in baskets.

I really like having my bed made even if the rest of the room is a mess. It encourages me to keep things tidy so I do that every morning. I also like a clean kitchen. It doesn’t always happen to be totally clean, but if the bed is made and the kitchen is clean I can be a little satisfied with my efforts.

Some of it is having realistic standards. There’s a lot going on for you at the moment. Eating off of paper plates is an option, decluttering so there just less stuff to clean up is totally an option.

Oh and timers are your friend. 5-10 minutes of focused time will do wonders for your home.

 

[thetruthoftruth]

@forgiven_ent I do not fold clothes. Just put them where they go. There is zero difference.
My 4 yr old goes through her drawer 1x looking for a shirt and it destroys the drawer, so I quit folding.

I just line up laundry baskets:
kitchen - towels
bathroom - towels
parent basket
child basket

the kids can sort and fold towels

fast, easy, not overwhelming

hubs and I fold our clothes of course
but otherwise it’s just not required

 

[mummyoftwogirls]

@megan120711 Higher a cleaning lady to come 2 times a month. It will really help. Thanks

 

[missh84]

@megan120711 I guess I’m curious what you mean by this. Is it dirty, like you need to vacuum and clean windows? That takes about 20 minutes a week in my house, or maybe twice a week.

Is it organization/messiness that’s the main issue? There are many options for this… Putting some toys away in bins in a closet and rotating. Getting toys out of the main walkway and into rooms or a basement. Buying dollar store bins for tidiness. Keeping a laundry basket out and dropping misplaced items into it throughout the day so things are clean at the end and you just find homes that last 5 minutes after the kids are in bed.

I like to practice having the kids clean up with me daily, but not gonna lie that as I have more kids that happens less frequently. My 2 year old can do some and my 4 year old needs close supervision to keep him on track, but starting earlier in life is the best way to form a habit and capture them before they get big opinions about everything, ugh.

Any specific struggles? If laundry, sorry, that’s my Achilles heel!

 

[jeremymikeg]

@missh84 Agreed. Here's some advice for when I get in over my head, ymmv

Is it cluttered?
Get some storage boxes and throw as much stuff in as possible and pack it away and maybe sort it out at a less busy season down the road. Add baskets where the clutter piles- a kitchen island with 6 baskets on it is better than a kitchen island with 6 baskets worth of junk all over it

Is it filthy?
Divide and conquer. Anyone who is capable needs to help remove filth, that's an "emergency" to do item

Are the people in the home not doing their part?
Play dumb! Mama doesn't need to pull everyone's weight. Whine because all the bowls are missing, then praise your teenager who so kindly brings out their hoard of dishes and switches the dishwasher. Ask your husband "what chores should we do this weekend" and follow his list like that classic assignment kids do in elementary school where they write the directions for something simple like brushing their teeth or making a sandwich- that will encourage husband to really take ownership so you can take a breather on the mental load without having to have some tiresome conversation first.

Is the routine lacking?
Write it down. Or try and app (I like the "tody" app, you can put in each room and then each chore and the frequency it needs done. It's simple enough that kids can use it. Paper works fine though.) Don't try to clean it all and start from scratch, just write your routine and do what's on today's list, you'll catch up faster than you'd imagine.

No motivation?
Make it a 5 minute race to tidy up together, or a family fun time, or an opportunity for one on one time- don't plan on tidying at stressful times of day, and do remember how refreshing it feels to get a few chores done and use that as your positive motivation if you can