Bedwetting in a 13 yo (X-post from r/Parenting)

thornbearer

New member
My son, age 13 has been having issues with bedwetting, always has been there since around 5 years old. but it's getting really bad now. Hes wearing Goodnites but is constantly leaking through them I don't know what to do. His doctor is saying hell "Grow out of it" but is constantly leaking through his pull ups, I would understand a leak or two, but has completely emptying it. Doctor isn't helping much so i wanted to try reddit and see what other parents had to say. Any different product that I can look into to stop the leaking? Any help appreciated.

(Edit 1: Should I try tape style adult diapers. or is that too far for a boy his age. Will definitely stop the leaking for the time being)
 
@thornbearer If I was in your shoes I would want to ask that doctor: how common is this? Do you have any research or resources on it you can direct me to? If he doesn't grow out of it, what might it be? Is there anything that might cause this we could screen for just in case? What are some symptoms we should look out for that might indicate it's not benign? And what medical issues would those be associated with? At what point does it become something to worry about? I'd probably also get a second opinion, even if I had to pay out of pocket.
 
@lucy85 Thank you, ive asked the doctor how common it is and he says it can happen all the way till 16, we have taken him to get screened and nothing seems wrong with his bladder. I will ask if he might have some sort of medical issue. Again thanks for the help, in the meantime what should i do about him and his leaking he is very embarrsed and will often cry when he leaks through his pull ups and calls himself a baby and whatnot. Im tired of washing his sheets everyday.
 
@lucy85 is there anything I can do at the moment, punishments, reward systems. Maybe even a different product? I have looked far and wide for different pull ups and tried several, all of them seem to not work. maybe some councelling, tried those beeping alarms and he throws them off of himself in his sleep. up to anything at this point.
 
@thornbearer If it was me, I might look into counseling in case it's like an anxiety thing, or something. But by that age I doubt it's something you discipline into going away. I'm not an expert though.
 
@lucy85 I will look into counceling, it might be something to do with his bullying at school. He got into a fight with some bullies in the bathroom, he got pretty banged up there is a video of the fight and people are made fun of him for "Losing the fight" i have already thought about counceling since then since his ego has gone down the drain recently. He might be just to afraid to go to the bathroom. Forgot to mention the handfull of accidents he had during the school year. Only increased the bullying.
 
@thornbearer Poor kid. If he’s miserable about it I wouldn’t consider a reward system at all.

What about limiting liquids before bed, and no soda/tea with dinner as they’re diuretics. That was a huge game changer for us. Plus waiting to pee until right before climbing in for bed.

There are also bed wetting alarms you can set to wake him up every 4 h or so, they’re either like watches or something that buzzes on the bed to wake him up enough to check in with his body.

There are a few bed wetting pajama companies, like PeeJammas, not sure how their sizing is.

What about having just a removable waterproof sheet protector like this directly over the fitted mattress protector?
 
@thornbearer Poor kid those bullies need to be kicked out of school. I hope they have backed off. Bullies usually have miserable home lives. I was bullied really bad by a girl in 7th grade and we made peace one day I guess she tired or bored with me.

Have you tried waking him up in the middle of the night to go pee? I am sure there are other kids his age that do this but I hope you find the cause soon. Good luck
 
@thornbearer Are you seeing a gastro (GI) doctor or your pediatrician? I listened to a GI doc talk about bed wetting and it can actually be attributed to constipation.
 
@thornbearer If the doctor is so cavalier about it then they should give you a prescription for adult sized incontinence products and you should have your medical insurance deliver them to your door.

As everyone else said get a second opinion. At this point you should have at least seen a urologist.

Does your child happen to have a diagnosis that affects executive functioning (ADHD, ASD, etc.) These may affect wetting the bed and if properly managed during waking hours it helps during sleep.
 
@thornbearer Just throwing it out there but have you noticed any other signs like tiredness, drinking more, etc? I only ask as I started wetting the bed just before I was diagnosed with diabetes as a teen.
 
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