Any elementary teachers here?

tonni

New member
Hi all. I have two kiddos, ages 8 and 6. After a long (mostly internal) debate, my husband and I are done with having babies. I originally wanted more. But I feel like my job as an elementary teacher, plus the pandemic, were big factors in our decision. I’m tired. Not sure if that’s good or bad, it just is.

But I’m curious, how many teachers on here have more than two?? Most of my coworkers have one or two. Those who have three have a heavy support system (grandparents in town usually). I mother/teach students all day and then come home to my own kids at night. My husband is awesome, and does a lot, but I’m still drained.

I also wonder if the fact that I taught kids before having my own warned me on how exhausting they are. I already knew what it felt like to be surrounded by children for hours and hours lol. I see parents with big families sometimes seem like they didn’t know what they were getting themselves into.

Sometimes I get jealous of people who have the mental and physical space to have more than two, and wonder if I made a mistake letting my job dictate my family size. But I love what I do and I did take a break from it for a couple years when my kids were tiny. I needed to be back doing what I love for my own identity. And really our decision to stop was more layered than just my job.

I’m open to the idea of adding to our family somehow in the future, maybe through foster care. But some other things to fall into place first.

I guess this is partially a ramble-y vent mixed in with some curiosity! Thanks for reading!!
 
@tonni I'm not a teacher but I want to thank you for your commitment to teaching. I know it's not easy out there and I am so glad there are generous souls like you to keep on for the sake of our littles. And fostering on top of that, you are a saint in my book. Many blessings 💛
 
@tonni I’m a first grade teacher. Before becoming a teacher I wanted 4 kids. After becoming a teacher I was set on two, but once I had my son (he’s 2) I’m currently fence sitting on maybe being one and done! Haha

Teaching young children all day, then coming home to a toddler is brutal!!! Plus my teacher salary doesn’t go very far these days. So I’m crazy impressed you managed to have 2 kids and do what you do! Also happy almost summer break!!!!
 
@tonni I’m kind of a teacher- I teach gross motor in special Ed classrooms (pediatric PT) and I have the elementary school schedule like teachers. My husband is also a HS teacher. We have 4 kids. We are exhausted. My husband coaches football in the fall season and that is the Hardest time with all kids bedtimes and just me- i have to call my mom for backup support and she’s usually super tired from working all day. But she has gotten really close with the kids and we try to only ask for her help when we absolutely need it. I have a ridiculously high level of energy so I rely on that to get me through and love our kids so much even when they’re tantrumy. We make normal teacher salaries and are super poor right now… it’s sad. But I have the mentality that they’re only little for so long and we will only be poor until they’re out of daycare! The students I work with have severe handicaps or autism so I find that I am ridiculously grateful for my healthy kids when I get home. We have parents who fly south during the school year and the other set are doctors so they do help but mostly as requested which we are so grateful for. They retire next month and I cannot wait for the extra help! I find I have happy family moments more than the ridiculously hard moments which makes it all worth it. Also- husband is super hands on. I always wanted a big family and I do feel selfish sometimes for working but like you said- I love my work. I find I’m a better parent when I can be positive and happy for the after school hours then super tired from being a SAHM all day. I’m a very social person. I drop off later at daycare and my husband picks up early due to our two different (primary and secondary) schedules. Probably TMI but wanted to say yes it’s crazy but we are happy with our decision although its SUPER stressful financially.
 
@inthesanctuary Sounds beautiful and stressful!! I think your right - money comes and goes. Daycare costs are ridiculous. My neighbor is a junior high teacher and has 4 and I don’t know how she does it. But her husband stayed home when they were really little, and her MIL is over to help a lot. I’m glad you will get more help from family soon!! It’s not TMI - I appreciate your insight!!

I teach art and don’t have high levels of energy lol. I see 120 students a day, 6 classes for forty-five minutes each. It’s a lot. Plus art is seen as “fluff” so I don’t get the same support as classroom teachers. No one hands me curriculum, and I don’t get push-in minutes for students who need extra help (like they get in math and reading). Sigh. There are perks of course, I don’t have to do standardized testing and get to teach what I want, but it can be pretty exhausting. I actually debated doing OT for a little while, as there is some overlap and I like the idea of working with less students at a time, but can’t afford a medical degree. At least right now.

Thank you again!!!! Hope your end of school year goes well!!
 
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