Will childcare share hinder minority language development?

[aidenb]

I am a SAHM and we do OPOL, I speak to him in the minority language (Japanese) and im the only one that does on a day to day basis as we live in USA. A parent of a mums group im a part of reached out to me to see if we’d be interested in a babysitting/play date swap of a couple of days a week. For example, my kid does 2mornings/week at theirs and their kid does 3 mornings/week at ours etc. My husband works Night Shift so our house is Japanese in the morning, he’s awake during the afternoons, so our house hold becomes English in the afternoons, although I speak to my son in Japanese always, when I’m addressing both its English. And then back to Japanese before bedtime.

My hesitation with this is how much would that affect my sons Japanese development? Will I still be able to speak Japanese to my so while his friend is over? Or do u think I’ll naturally switch to english?

My number 1 goal and the reason I’m so adamant that I’ll stay home with him is so that he can learn Japanese.

Any thoughts, opinions and anecdotal evidence all appreciated here. Thank you!

Edit to add:
Thanks for your input everyone. I’ve decided not to do it as I’m really not looking for childcare right now, and I’d only be doing it to help out the other family. Sometimes I gotta do me, and what’s best for my little family. And it’s given me the push to make steps to try to find a Japanese speaking friend for my son to play with!

 

[jamesmason10]

@aidenb I understand Japanese is important to you, and if you're not interested in childcare help don't do this, but if you feel a break for you and socialising for your child would be good for both of you don't sacrifice everything for language. At the very least make sure your child is getting to play with others at times.

 

[aidenb]

@jamesmason10 Right. I’m not really looking for childcare… but I’m worried about sacrificing too much for language. The only pro for us would be maybe my son will get the socialising he’s missing out on if he were in day care, but he also does swim and gymnastics classes, playground and play dates… and he’s only 21mo. And I feel like he’s just started to pick up words and it’s wonderful to hear him use both! (But still definitely a bit more English leaning).

 

[jamesmason10]

@aidenb Ah, well if he's doing other activities that's fine. Honestly, if you don't really want the help I'm not sure I'd get into an arrangement like that. Language issues aside I'd be worried about it being a burden to be committed to caring for someone else's child a few days a week. Maybe look a bit more for other Japanese families? Or a Japanese tutor/babysitter?

 

[katrina2017]

@aidenb I'd say it'll accelerate your son's English acquisition/production, which may feel like hindering his Japanese - because , essentially, even if you speak to him in Japanese throughout the playdate, the mornings will become predominantly English (as the common language).

I think you should also be transparent about using Japanese with your son to the other family. Language aside, I'd also discuss other parenting choices with the other family but I'm sure other groups here can be more helpful. (And, going from one child to two can be quite chaotic, even if it's temporary!)

When my older child was 2+, my children started going to childcare (in English, the majority language), and within two weeks, English had taken over. Now, after quite some time, both my children speak the minority language with me (they hadn't for a while and it took a bit of time/effort to get them to), and they're doing really well (I think) considering, so it's worked out fine.

I guess what I'm saying is - yes, this childcare option will likely have a potentially negative effect on your son's Japanese language acquisition (by strengthening the English) but that doesn't mean that in the long run, he won't be able to speak Japanese well - especially since you say it's something that's very important to you.

 

[assana]

@aidenb I live in Australia, my friend is Japanese and her husband is Australian (Doesn't speak Japanese)

She only speaks Japanese to them and I'm sure speaks English when the husband is home - her kids are 3 and 5 and their Japanese is amazing, even better than their English tbh!

頑張ってね！

 

[godmadegorillas]

@aidenb I'll share my experience in case it helps you, I hope it's not too irrelevant. My younger kid (age 2.5) goes to daycare and the older one (5) didn't but he attended a lot of playdates. I've always spoken to them in the minority language ( even at home even though their dad doesnt speak my langauge, though tbh he's picking up too after so much repetition), unless I'm addressing them as part of a group of kids who don't speak the minority language which hasn't been that often. I would say that the younger who's currently going to daycare in the community language is learning both languages pretty well. The older one was okay in the majority language but quickly improved a lot once he started kindergarten. Overall, I haven't noticed anything concerning in terms of their language development even though they had different experiences so far. So I'd say take it one day at a time and do this arrangement if you like the idea of having some rest from parenting for a few hours a week and for your child to socialize.

 

[hobster777]

@aidenb In my experience, but it's just me, it hasn't hindered anything. My son has been in daycare in the community language since he was 9 months. He's 2.5 now and still is mostly verbal in the minority language, which I always speak to him at home. We also Facetime my relatives, watch tv and read books in the minority language. Between myself and my partner we speak the community language, but I always address my son in my language.

So I think it can work. It's really about the connection you build to the minority language in the time you have with him.

 

[aldredian]

@aidenb Honestly, I'd look into finding a nanny that speaks Japanese and try and find another family interested in speaking Japanese and do nanny share that way. For extra Japanese exposure.

But as someone mentioned, it's more whether you get something out of this setup from a social perspective for yourself and maybe for bub. I do feel though that if bub's play dates are in English, they're going to prefer English over Japanese.

I will also recommend you ONLY speak Japanese to your son even if husband is home. That's what I do (I speak Mandarin). I only speak Mandarin to my son even if I'm mid-sentence in English with my husband.

What this has done is I've established a relationship and a pattern that mummy is always Mandarin and daddy is English. And further, my husband is picking Mandarin up along the way. I'm needing to translate for my husband less and less these days.

My son started daycare at 2.5yo which is after he started speaking both languages and even though daycare is only in English, he still only speaks Mandarin to me. I spend 1 day a week with him at home for full Mandarin exposure and try and visit my parents once a week or at least every other weekend. That and arranging Mandarin play dates for him. That is probably the most important part. Even the socialising part I try to get as much exposure and I think that helps with keeping the language. If you can find Japanese playgroups for bub, then you're killing 2 birds with one stone.

One other idea. Maybe you tell the other parent that you speak Japanese to your son and would prefer to continue to do that even with the swap. Are they interested in exposing their child to a different language? Maybe they'll be up for it.

 

[aidenb]

@aldredian Thank you. This was the push I needed to try to find a Japanese speaking friend for him!

 

[bassplayer72]

@aidenb Not recommending one way or the other, but if you do do the childcare swap thing, what if you only talked to all the children in Japanese, and your son had to be the interpreter for his friends? Could super impress his friends and make him take pride in his ability. You could make a game of it or set up some sort of system that rewards him for interpreting.

 

[aidenb]

@bassplayer72 This is a great idea if the kids were older. Only 21 months here

 

[bassplayer72]

@aidenb Haha that certainly changes things.

 

[tone2133]

@aidenb My wife is Japanese and we are also doing OPOL, and she regrets putting out daughter in childcare. She felt that our daughter missed formative years in language acquisition.

In my experience, I've been around other families with sahms and their children's Japanese are stellar. Obviously this isn't the sole reason why the kids are more fluent but it was something I noticed.