Hello. I am an adult survivor of child neglect and abuse. Like many of us, I had no idea how bad what I was experiencing was at the time it was happening.
Part of the abuse was scapegoating and playing the role of identified patient. I was put in therapy around 8/9 years old due to “behavioral issues” which I now understand was normal behavior for a neglected and abused child, but my parents were of the mindset that there was something horribly wrong with me and took me from doctor to doctor to do every possible test because my parents were not satisfied that the evaluations I had were always pretty much inconclusive. I’ve even looked back at the notes I could get from a therapist I saw in high school and they paint a portrait of a generally normal kid who was unhappy because of instability at home.
Now here is my question: when I was somewhere between 9 and 12 years old, I saw a child psychologist/psychiatrist (she did therapy and not strictly meds) for 2 years (she was a med resident) who just played card games with me every session. I’m sure there was some minimal dialogue sometimes maybe for the first 5 minutes, but often she just asked me what game I wanted to play and then we played uno or other similar games for an hour. I loved this therapist, but I have no idea why she took this approach.
Part of me asking is I’m not sure if my therapists knew that I was being neglected and abused? The only thing I can think of is perhaps that therapist just wanted to give me that hour of respite and pleasant interaction with an adult, but that would mean she knew, no? I’m bewildered why it was never reported, I had teachers that I know for a fact knew because they pulled me out of class to ask me about things at home.
Part of the abuse was scapegoating and playing the role of identified patient. I was put in therapy around 8/9 years old due to “behavioral issues” which I now understand was normal behavior for a neglected and abused child, but my parents were of the mindset that there was something horribly wrong with me and took me from doctor to doctor to do every possible test because my parents were not satisfied that the evaluations I had were always pretty much inconclusive. I’ve even looked back at the notes I could get from a therapist I saw in high school and they paint a portrait of a generally normal kid who was unhappy because of instability at home.
Now here is my question: when I was somewhere between 9 and 12 years old, I saw a child psychologist/psychiatrist (she did therapy and not strictly meds) for 2 years (she was a med resident) who just played card games with me every session. I’m sure there was some minimal dialogue sometimes maybe for the first 5 minutes, but often she just asked me what game I wanted to play and then we played uno or other similar games for an hour. I loved this therapist, but I have no idea why she took this approach.
Part of me asking is I’m not sure if my therapists knew that I was being neglected and abused? The only thing I can think of is perhaps that therapist just wanted to give me that hour of respite and pleasant interaction with an adult, but that would mean she knew, no? I’m bewildered why it was never reported, I had teachers that I know for a fact knew because they pulled me out of class to ask me about things at home.