Unplanned 3rd

scrooge

New member
14 weeks pregnant, 3rd child , youngest is 5. This was a planned pregnancy but I can’t help but feel regret and dread.
I forgot how much you lose yourself in motherhood. How insecure you feel while pregnant .
I don’t know if I should start taking antidepressants, I’m so scared it will harm the baby, I don’t even take Panadol because I’m that paranoid .
I guess I’m asking has anyone regretted their planned pregnancy ?
I’m 38 years old
 
@scrooge Hello. Im a FTM at 37. I went through a lot of grief with my pregnancy. I love my baby. I never wanted anything else. But I mourn my freedom. While I was pregnant while I was thinking about the baby and hopes for her, I also was sad at times. Going to the movies? When baby comes I will have to plan a sitter. Wanting to chill in bed playing video games? Not anymore. Going to swim for hours? Can't do it. It was and still is hard.

I went on antidepressants fairly quickly. I knew I needed to be mentally and emotionally able to take care of myself and my child. Perinatal depression is real. Once I got on meds I noticed I felt more excited about her arrival. She is healthy no issues. There are antidepressants that are safer for use in pregnancy.

I wish you the best of luck.
 
@scrooge A girl friend of mine recently went through this. She had a planned pregnancy with her third. Right away she didn’t feel like her normal pregnant self. The sickness was really getting to her and she was so sad she wasn’t able to take care of her girls like she normally does. She was missing events and became very detached with her pregnancy. She was feeling very depressed. After a lot of consideration and talks with her husband, she got an abortion and instantly felt better. It changed everything. It wasn’t a decision she took lightly, but it was right for her.
 
@scrooge Can you contact your doctor? I read before, that there anti depressants you can safely take during pregnancy. And it is normal to feel insecure and scared during pregnancy. Something major is going on with your body, your life will change a lot. Also ask for support from your partner and try to let the beautiful moments in. I was scared and disgusted and exhausted the first half of my pregnancy but then it was as if a switch was flipped and I got so excited when I started to feel him and started to talk to him. Now I miss being pregnant, even though I have a beautiful 14 month old. All he best to you, you are going to figure it out. Changes need some time to get adjusted to.
 
@scrooge I don't like pregnancy at all but I've done it twice and I know I will do it again. I did take antidepressants throughout all my pregnancies and recently increased my dosage. It definitely helped me. I think panadol is less safe than antidepressants.
 
@strange1 How old are your children? The antidepressants didn’t affect your children’s behaviour ?
I’ve been hearing podcasts from doctors who claim the antidepressants cross the placenta and definitely get to the foetus, causing autism and some delays ?
 
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